Summer Breeze

 Psychokittensenshi611

 

 	Her hands felt like the warm summer breeze on my cheeks.  "You can’t 

 love me."  She said it like a rule; a law.  Somewhere, it had been written that I 

 would not, could not feel this emotion that ran deep inside my veins alongside my 

 blood.

 	"I do!"  I wanted to shout at her, but it came out as only a whisper.  I was 

 so afraid, yet so contented just to be with her.  "I love you"...

 	"But you can’t!"  She was able to shout out me.  She pulled me closer to 

 her face, her sweet breath like dark purple irises on my lips.  "You’re... you are 

 everything I can not be.  You’re...so pure...so utterly pure."  She closed her eyes 

 and bent her head, as if to avoid staring back into mine.  "I can never be what 

 you deserve."

 	My heart felt like it would sink down in my chest or rise above it at any 

 moment.  Couldn’t she see?  Couldn’t she open her eyes and her heart?  "I don’t 

 know what I deserve"but you’re what I want.  You’re everything I could ever 

 want and you’re what I need."  She was shaking, her hands were shaking on my 

 cheeks.  The breeze was faltering.  "Hotaru-chan, please," I touched her chin 

 gently.

 	She looked up at me once again, tears trickling down her pale cheeks in 

 small rivers of diamond tears.  "Oh Chibi-Usa," her lips shook out the words.  

 "How could you want me?"  I wiped the tears gently from her cheeks.  "I’m...the 

 darkness"and you’re the light.  You are life and I am death."  She looked down 

 at her knees again.  "How could you love me?"

 	"You’re wrong, Hotaru-chan!"  I could feel my heart rising higher, into my 

 breasts and hands and feet, spreading inside of me.  "You may be death, but you 

 are also rebirth.  You begin life, starting anew in a cycle that I have yet to 

 understand."  I leaned close into her face, wanting to feel her iris breath again.  

 "You are everything I could ever want, Hotaru-chan.  You are beauty in the 

 darkness.  You are my light."  Her lips were so close to mine.  "How could I not 

 want you?"

 	Her face flushed, pale cheeks that never seemed to tan turning a light 

 crimson.  "Don’t say that, please don’t say that…"

 	And, suddenly, it didn’t seem to matter to her what she had shouted 

 before.  When I leaned in just enough to feel her soft, full lips upon mine…well, 

 that was the end of everything and the beginning of something completely new.  I 

 could feel her hands at the base of my neck, tugging at the ends of my hair.  I 

 couldn’t stop myself from touching her pale arms, letting my hands meander up 

 to her shoulders and down her back.  She was so warm, so soft, like sheets of 

 silk left out in the sun.  I felt her lips pull away slightly from mine, and I moved 

 away a bit, just enough to end the kiss but still to feel her warmth.  She sighed 

 heavily onto my cheek and rested her head on my shoulder.

 	"Chibi-Usa," she said, her voice barely above a whisper.  "We can’t be 

 together like this."

 	"What do you mean?"  I nuzzled my head on top of hers, catching the 

 scent of her hair.  Lilacs.  I smiled.

 	"We can’t be…be lovers."  She moved slightly, her voice slightly softer.  

 "You’re to become Princess of Crystal Tokyo in the future.  You are going to 

 inherit a crown.  You can’t…be with me…"

 	"Hotaru-chan."  I felt that warm, rose colored feeling rise in my chest once 

 again.  Sparks could fly off of my fingertips.  Mountains would crumple at my very 

 whim…or at hers.  I could do anything with this feeling.  I could do anything with 

 her.  "I want you, I need you.  I love you.  All that I ask of you is that you give me 

 a chance, you give us a chance."  She sobbed lightly into the curve of my neck.  

 "Please, Hotaru-chan…the future isn’t unchangeable.  Just me coming to the 

 past all these times has changed it."

 	"But…"

 	"Hush, Hotaru-chan."  I cradled her head close to mine.  I smiled slightly.  

 "Normally, I’m the one crying to you."  We both chuckled a bit.  "Hotaru-chan, I 

 just want you to…to let me love you.  Just for awhile."

 	"But don’t you see?  Can’t you see that if I let you then – "

 	"Then what?"

 	She paused, moving away from me and wiping her tears.  "Chibi-

 Usa…this can’t work."

 	"No, what would happen?"

 	"Don’t you see, it can’t work, because – "

 	"No, don’t ignore me."  I pulled her closer once again.  "What would 

 happen if you and I became a couple?"

 	She was quiet, just staring back into my eyes and quivering a bit in my 

 arms.  She didn’t even seem to breathe.  Her lovely, thin frame rest so close to 

 mine on the floor of her dimly lit room.  Pale hands and feet seemed even paler 

 in comparison to her dark clothes.  My little black angel.  "I can’t tell you…not 

 now…"

 	"What is it, Hotaru-chan?"  I pulled her onto my knees.  "I’ve told you a 

 secret I’ve kept from you for awhile now.  Why can’t you tell me?"

 	She swallowed audibly.  "I’ve loved you for as long as I can remember.  

 Since I first met you, Chibi-Usa.  And if we are together, and I let myself love 

 you…it’ll just be like everyone else.  I don’t want you to leave…to go away like 

 everyone I’ve loved…"

 	"I could never go away from you."  I couldn’t feel anything for a minute.  It 

 was like my heart stopped beating in my chest.  My veins continued only to pump 

 the crimson feeling of love I felt for her.  And then, whenever my heart decided to 

 start up again, I was kissing her.  It was with a kind of fierceness that she kissed 

 me back.  Her small caresses and fierce kisses and explorations made me weak 

 in my knees.

 	The silver and golden rays of sunlight drifted into Hotaru’s room.  I just lay 

 there for awhile, surrounded by her sweet scent and wrapped in her arms.  The 

 shadows of tree leaves left dark spots across her blanket and bare midriff.  I 

 couldn’t help but stare at her.  God, she was beautiful.  Lying there like that.  Her 

 hair a bit messed up, strands sprawled out behind her head on her pillow.  Her 

 eyes were closed, but I knew them with just a memory.  Dark purple, almost 

 black, deep as any ocean but clear as a sunny sky.  How could one human being 

 be so perfect, so utterly beautiful in every way?  How could someone like her 

 love someone like me?

 	I kissed her shoulders, just for the feeling of her silken skin on my lips.  

 There was nothing more I wanted in the world than to be there with her, lying in 

 her comfortable bed, bathed in the strong light of the sun or the pale, comforting 

 light of the moon.  There was no other place that could soothe me like this.  Her 

 arms were my only shelter, her lips my only release.

 	She stirred a bit, her muscles moving slightly underneath my lips and 

 hands.  I rested my head by her breast, loving the sound of her heart beating 

 beneath my ears.  Her breathing relaxed me…deep and smooth and soft all at 

 once.  I closed my eyes, just loving the feel of her beside me, underneath me, all 

 around me.