view old/stories/starcrossed.txt @ 4:69f0191c9016 moonlitnights tip

added error.log and access.log
author Robert McIntyre <rlm@mit.edu>
date Tue, 22 Jun 2010 13:42:35 -0400
parents fc00894c1d4a
children
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1 Salutations. Sorry for the length of time it was between stories . .
2 . actually, no, I'm not too sure if I am. I got three E-mails
3 regarding Toujours. One asked me when the next chapter was coming
4 out, another condemned my actions, and a third was a fiction idea. A
5 few E-mails here and there that tell me you enjoy my reading, or hate
6 it, and the reasons why would be very helpful for not only better
7 stories but my actual will to write them. Address is the same if you
8 want to E-Mail me: Saturn_Knight@hotmail.com . Anyhow, this is the
9 idea of the person who E-mailed me, and thus dedicated to her. Enjoy,
10 Maggie.
12 Yet another overcast, cloudy day in Japan. The wind ripped through
13 the trees, scattering leaves across the lush green grass of the park
14 where both Hotaru and Chibi-Usa were sitting. It was on the cooler
15 side, and neither girl had anything warmer than a heavy sweater,
16 though neither wanted to move from their location. However, a stray
17 gust of wind caught Hotaru off guard, causing her to shiver and pull
18 her arms tighter around herself.
19 "Are you cold?" Chibi-Usa asked, worried that her friend might
20 catch a chill and become sick. Hotaru only had time to nod once
21 before she was moved, being rearranged by Chibi-Usa . "Here, what if
22 I sit like..." Hotaru's back was moved against the other girl's chest
23 and a set of arms found their way around her body, clasping around
24 her stomach. Chibi felt a little odd with the position, thinking she
25 was behaving too much like her mother and Mamoru, but she wanted to
26 keep her friend warm. Hotaru smiled over her shoulder, her eyes have
27 closed with sleep, before she settled into her friend's body,
28 thinking the position was all too right.
29 "Tired too huh?" The pink haired girl asked, adjusting her body so
30 that Hotaru's shoulder didn't hit her directly in the rib. Once more,
31 the quiet girl nodded, yawning as if to accentuate Chibi's point
32 before growing still. "Yeah, sleep on me." Chibi mumbled with a smile
33 on her face, "You're like just like Artemis." Hotaru didn't rise a
34 reply, only the quiet, steady sound of her breathing was heard in the
35 still of the park evening. The smaller girl's mind began to wander,
36 looking her friend over thoughtfully before coming to an unusual
37 conclusion, 全he trusts me enough to sleep...and with her that's a
38 pretty big thing.' Chibi thought, trying to hold as still as possible
39 though her body tried to make her fidget. 選've only seen her sleep
40 in bed at home, in my room on the floor, or with Puu, but...' Her
41 tiny, soft hand brushed some of Hotaru's hair from in front of her
42 eyes, 鮮ot me...not like this.'
43 A mix of emotions began to work their way through Chibi's system:
44 happiness, flattery, excitement, but also uncertainty and doubt.
45 閃aybe she's just to exhausted...I made her run around a lot today.'
46 She thought to herself, pursing her lips as she again commanded her
47 body to remain still. 全he's probably just too tired to stay
48 awake...but....maybe she trusts me? Of course she trusts me, she's my
49 best friend! She tells me things she'd never tell anyone
50 else...but...' Chibi shook her head quickly to clear her thoughts,
51 the ends of her hair slapping her in the face. The movement roused
52 Hotaru, who took a deep breath and opened her eyes.
53 "I fell asleep..." she thought verbally, sitting up, putting a hand
54 to her face and rubbing the open palm down her cheek. "I'm sorry."
55 Hotaru spoke aloud and turned to face Chibi, her voice sounding
56 groggy and disconnected. The pink haired girl glanced away, looking
57 hurt. 選t was an accident...' She stood up, brushing her jeans off,
58 全he didn't do it because she trusted me.' This quick movement
59 startled Hotaru, who fell back onto her ankles and looked up at Chibi
60 questioningly.
61 "Let's go home." The smaller girl said with a slight snip in her
62 voice that made Hotaru wonder what she did wrong. 全he's.....not mad
63 that I fell asleep on her, is she?' Hotaru thought as she got to her
64 feet and balanced herself from the uneasy equilibrium of someone who
65 just woke. Putting a hand on Chibi's shoulder to keep herself
66 upright, Hotaru got a sharp look and quickly withdrew it. 全he's mad
67 at me,' the black haired girl thought, looking to her feet and
68 wrapping her arms around herself. 全he's upset that I fell asleep on
69 her...maybe I should just go home for the night...' "I'm really
70 sorry, Chibi-Usa....I swear."
71 "I know you are." Chibi answered, thinking 禅hat's why it hurts...'
72 "Come on," and she started in the direction back to Usagi's house not
73 waiting to see if Hotaru followed.
74 選'm sorry.....' Hotaru thought, hanging her head and beginning to
75 follow after her friend who had a considerable lead on her, 選 didn't
76 mean to assume too much trust...'
78 Back at the Tsukino residence, both girls sat on the floor in
79 Chibi's room in complete silence. The blatherings of Usagi were heard
80 through the walls as she yakked away on the phone to one of her
81 friends. "When she's done, I'll call Michi-Mama and go home." Hotaru
82 said, not looking at Chibi, in a timid, almost frightened voice.
83 塑ou're mad at me and I'm afraid I'm going to ruin things if I
84 stay...'
85 "If you want to," Chibi replied, picking up a manga that was on the
86 table next to her and started flipping through the pages. 全he's that
87 upset with herself....she can't trust me anymore? We used to sleep
88 over all the time, why is it different now?' Drawings of various
89 characters flew by her as she furiously turned the pages, 糎as it
90 because I was holding onto her?' Hotaru noticed Chibi's obviously
91 riled demeanor and heaved a sigh, thinking 全he can't wait for me to
92 leave...I'm sorry! I didn't mean to assume!'
93 Neither said a word after that, and Usagi hadn't closed her mouth
94 for a full 10 minutes. Hotaru hugged her legs to her chest, her chin
95 resting on her tight-covered knees with her eyes cast down onto the
96 floor. She was thinking, which was always a dangerous thing,
97 especially in the emotional state she was in now. Hotaru remembered
98 all the fun times she and Chibi-Usa had in the past: parties, sleep
99 overs, playing at the park, or even just sitting and spilling their
100 hearts out to each other. 羨ll of that's over now...' The silence
101 senshi told herself, 腺ecause you let yourself fall asleep when she
102 was holding you....now she's going to know how you feel, and she's
103 going to tell you to go away because she's in love with HIM.'
104 Chibi glanced at her friend, a little concerned. Even if Hotaru
105 wasn't speaking aloud, she couldn't hide her ragged breathing and how
106 her arms clutched her legs tighter with every passing second. 全he's
107 that mad at me? Oh Hotaru, don't hate me... I just wanted to make you
108 comfortable...' Hotaru let out a swift, uneven breath as she clutched
109 her legs tight enough to make her knees crack. 前h gods, no... don't
110 take it out on yourself... I better say something...' "Puu said that
111 Helios was asking about me again." Chibi remarked, saying the first
112 thing that came to her head, but instantly wondered if it was the
113 right thing to do.
114 Hotaru gave Chibi a look as if she'd just struck her, her mouth
115 hanging open for a fraction of a second before she caught herself,
116 only nodding in response. 全he's telling me about HIM...' Hotaru
117 thought, mentally hissing the last word, not even wanting to think
118 his name. 全he's doing it because she wants me to know she's still in
119 love with him, and that thing at the park was just a friendly
120 thing...' She swallowed hard and rested her forehead on her knees
121 now, looking down at the floor, her face hidden.
122 選'll never be able to be anything more than a friend to her. She's
123 always going to see me as just a friend. No matter what I do...god,
124 don't start here, you're only going to embarrass yourself.' But she
125 couldn't hold it in anymore, and the tears started to drip from her
126 eyes, quickly being absorbed into her tights. Hotaru daren't make a
127 sound.
128 "I want to go back and see him soon," Chibi said, looking out the
129 window, only trying to make Hotaru happy. She figured that the reason
130 Hotaru was so upset was that they were so physically close to each
131 other and she'd gotten uncomfortable. "I wonder what our wedding is
132 going to be like?" The pink haired girl mused aloud, closing her eyes
133 to picture the event. "I want lots of flowers, and music, and
134 everyone's going to be invited." She paused to consider something,
135 tilting her head, "And I can have a really big cake, cus I know
136 Usagi's going to be a pig and eat it all."
137 Hotaru started to shake, 糎hy is she doing this to me?' the tears
138 were flowing harder now and she had to give everything she had to
139 avoid sobbing loudly and running out of the room. 選s she trying to
140 hurt me? I didn't think she'd do that...did I make her that mad? Oh,
141 Chibi don't do this to me...please!' But, she only nodded, fighting
142 to keep her sniffles silent as she listened to her friend continue.
143 "Oh, and a really big dress. I want one that's pink and white with
144 little yellow bunnies on the veil, so he has to laugh when he kisses
145 me." Chibi smiled faintly at the thought, but only for effect. Her
146 heart wasn't in it. She was only saying what she thought Hotaru
147 wanted to hear, and looking out the window, she didn't notice that
148 the black haired girl cringed and tightened her hands into fists at
149 the mention of a kiss. Chibi-Usa continued, "Then comes the
150 honeymoon...where do you think he and I should go?"
151 Hotaru thought for a moment, knowing full well where she wanted to
152 send Helios, but only shrugged her shoulders. She would be
153 nice....she had to be, Chibi loved him, and she had no choice but to
154 accept that. Her friend was happy with this guy, and she would be
155 happy for her. Even if it killed her.
156 "I want somewhere romantic..." Chibi-Usa said, making her best
157 effort to sound wistful, and dreamy, "Because...you know, honey moon
158 stuff." That was the straw that broke the camel's back. Hotaru simply
159 couldn't take it any more. Giving in to her body's desires, she
160 simply let go and allowed herself to sob. It terrified Chjbi; it
161 didn't seem human, so much agony was reserved for the damned. It was
162 followed by a short, but loud scream as Hotaru slammed her fist into
163 the floor in frustration with herself and the situation. A soft,
164 sickening cracking sound issued from the blow, but it was completely
165 disregarded. "Hotaru....?" Chibi asked carefully, as a tear soaked
166 face raised from to look upon her. Hotaru's eyes were bloodshot, and
167 her skin was discolored from the tears and the dirt that was on the
168 knees of her tights from falling earlier.
169 "What, Chibi-Usa? What?" Hotaru managed between sobs, angry, but
170 not at her friend. "Want advice on what you should do with HIM!?"
171 That scared Chibi-Usa, who had frightening flash backs of Mistress 9,
172 and the sheer destructive nature that Hotaru possessed. Unable to
173 control herself, Hotaru bawled loudly, though Usagi's faint
174 conversation continued in the background. "I can't take it
175 anymore....I can't....I just can't!"
176 "Take what Hotaru!? You've been mean to me ever since the park! You
177 get mad at me cus you fall asleep, and then tell me that you didn't
178 mean to! You didn't know how happy it made me for you to show how
179 much you trusted me!" Chibi was just as agitated as Hotaru now, and
180 was speaking before she thought. 前h god, that's only going to make
181 her mad...please don't hurt yourself anymore... Please....'
182 "What?! You got mad and ran away when I told you I was sorry! I
183 just was so comfortable with you, and so happy to be around you that
184 I fell asleep! I said I was sorry!" Hotaru was too worked up to grasp
185 the situation, normally very keen on things, she simply couldn't see
186 where their messages got mixed up. "I didn't mean to!"
187 "You....trusted me?" Chibi's voice dropped from a yell to a
188 whisper. 選t wasn't a mistake...oh gods what have I done?!'
189 "Hotaru...oh no, no, no...gods no..." she approached the black haired
190 girl who took a step back and stood defensively to the advancement.
191 Her hand was already bruised a hideous, deep purple that marred her
192 alabaster perfection. 前h Hotaru what have I done to you?! But....why
193 did you get so mad? I have to know....' Swallowing hard, Chibi asked
194 the question that could make, or break their friendship, "Why did you
195 get so mad when I mention Helios?"
196 "Why...?" Hotaru asked, shaking her head, "Why...? Because you talk
197 about him like he's some kind of god! You tell me all the time about
198 how much you miss him, or how much you want to go back to see him."
199 Ignoring the pain that started to throb in her fingers, Hotaru
200 continued. "I'm jealous, Chibi-Usa. JEALOUS! I'm not perfect!"
201 "Jealous of what?! You're my best friend, I tell you EVERYTHING! I
202 tell you things I could never tell him!" Chibi shouted back, now
203 aggravated by Hotaru's unneeded jealousy. "Why are you so upset?!"
204 "Because I'm in love with you, that's why!" Hotaru yelled at Chibi
205 before she could even realize what she'd said. Both of them stood in
206 shock, Chibi-Usa's mouth dropping open as she stared at her friend
207 who suddenly grew sheepish, turning away as she mumbled "Because I'm
208 in love with you...I'm sorry, I'll go." Hotaru made a quick move for
209 the exit, but Chibi was much faster than she and grabbed onto her
210 injured arm, getting a short yelp of pain from Hotaru.
211 "I'm sorry....I didn't mean to....just don't go, please?
212 Stay....let me get you some ice for that hand...stay here, ok?
213 Promise me you'll stay here at least until I get back from the
214 kitchen." Chibi looked at the now quiet Hotaru who only nodded and
215 sat down on the bed, holding her bruised hand gingerly. Chibi-Usa ran
216 from her room, nearly colliding with Usagi who was in the kitchen,
217 still talking, and fixing herself a snack.
218 "What's all the yellin' about?" Usagi asked her daughter, who was
219 already filling a bag full of ice. Her mouth was packed with
220 chocolate donut, a glass of milk in her hand, and the phone cradled
221 against her shoulder. "And what's with the ice?"
222 "God you're nosy," Chibi said, closing the freezer and putting the
223 ice bag into a clean dish towel so it wouldn't freeze Hotaru's hand,
224 "Hotaru hurt herself and I'm getting her ice. Why are you stuffing
225 your face again?"
226 "Cus I'm hungry, duh." Usagi said over another bite of donut,
227 mumbling something incoherent to the person on the other end of the
228 phone before walking out of the kitchen and back to her room.
229 "You're always hungry..." The pink haired girl grumbled while she
230 hurried back to her room to find Hotaru still seated on the bed, her
231 tear stained face looking towards the floor. "Here you go.." Chibi
232 offered the ice carefully to Hotaru who took it and applied it to her
233 injury with a soft whine. "I'm sorry....Hotaru, really. I was only
234 mad cus I thought you were upset that you fell asleep on me...that
235 you were mad at yourself for accidently doing that...that you didn't
236 trust me."
237 "I trust you..." Hotaru whispered quietly with a shake of her head,
238 "Otherwise I wouldn't have done that...I thought you were mad at me
239 for thinking I could be that way with you..." She sighed, adjusting
240 the ice to not put pressure on the injury, "And...I guess after I
241 told you what I did, you don't want to see me anymore. You're
242 supposed to be with hi-" she caught herself, and released a
243 controlled breath, "With Helios... I won't get in the way..."
244 "I...don't know if I want to be with him anymore." Chibi confessed,
245 looking desperately at her friend, "It just feels so fake when I'm
246 with him, like I have to be someone I'm not. It didn't used to be
247 like that, I used to be able to talk with him for hours, and just
248 enjoy being next to him...." Her red irises grew larger as she came
249 to a realization, "Just....like I am with you."
250 "You....you mean that?" Hotaru asked carefully, being certain not
251 to get her hopes up for nothing, demanding that she stay in control
252 of her body. Chibi only nodded and placed a hand on Hotaru's cheek.
253 The two looked into each other's eyes, Chibi-Usa's hand cupping her
254 friend's face comfortingly.
255 "You really scared me, Hotaru...I've never seen you like that." Usa
256 began, gently touching the shoulder of Hotaru's injured arm, "I don't
257 want you to hurt...You should have hit me, I was the one being the
258 jerk..."
259 "No..." The black haired girl shook her head, "I could never
260 purposely hurt you like that. You know I care about you too much...I
261 love you, Chibi..." She didn't expect an answer back, and was content
262 with just saying it to let her friend know how she truly and honestly
263 felt. "I'm going to have trouble explaining my hand to my parents,"
264 Hotaru quickly changed the subject, "They're going to worry abo-" She
265 was quickly silenced by Chibi-Usa who placed a single, slender digit
266 over her lips.
267 "I love you too Hotaru..."