Stepping Stones to the Future   

                        

                      

 This is a fanfic about Tomoyo and

 Sakura . It is a darker story than my previous 

 ones and it made me cry as I was writing it on 

 paper. I know that all of you are more 

 knowledgeable about CCS than I am, but I hope 

 you will like the story anyway. There are some 

 female to female interactions but no hentai , 

 and as always please send your comments to me at

 rphjas@lycos.com. This is the reason I have begun 

 writing again since 1975. I get to hear from you

 and please, comments good or bad are always 

 welcome can't get better without them because

 I still want to put my dreams into words for 

 you. Humbly yours Joe Saunders rphjas-san at

 rphjas@lycos.com .

 

 At the Daidouji Estate:	

 

 Tomoyo was satisfied with her preparations. 

 Everyone in the mansion was sound asleep and 

 her bedroom door was locked. She had laid out 

 several of her most precious treasures of Sakura

 on her large four poster bed. She had 

 painstakingly placed the camcorder and tripod in

 the right location. The light in the gigantic 

 room was at the perfect intensity. A soft 

 melancholic melody could be heard in the 

 background as Tomoyo worked in the room. Lying 

 on the bureau next to her sewing bag, the 

 manilla envelope waited to receive the soon to 

 be completed videotape.

 

 Gazing into her mirror, Tomoyo made some adjustments to

 her long lavender hair-tweaking a ribbon here or a bow there.

 She judged her appearance before the mirror. She 

 looked like an expert doll maker's masterpiece.

 Beautiful lavender hair fell on her shoulders and

 behind her back. Luminous lavender eyes 

 sparkled in her seemingly porcelain-like face. 

 Her long dress was a beautiful egg-shell blue 

 covered with red lace, bows, and trim. Tomoyo 

 sadly smiled at her reflection, but she could 

 not cry because all of the tears had been shed 

 during previous nights. 

 

 “I must look my best for my Sakura-chan.” thought Tomoyo as she 

 steeled up her willpower. Picking up a small 

 rubber eraser from the bureau top, she clasped 

 both hands around it and brought them to her 

 chest as if she were praying. 

 

 “Now for you, my Sakura-chan.”whispered Tomoyo.

 “My one last gift to you...“

 

 

 At the Kinomoto home: 

 

 

 

 

 Sakura picked at her food even though she was 

 hungry. She had been uneasy throughout supper.

 

 

 Touya's teasing bounced off her ears and went

 unnoticed. Her loving father's questions about 

 her

 

 day were lethargically answered. At the end

 of supper, she lazily waved at her father and 

 elder

 

 brother as they went to their respective 

 jobs. After finishing her chores, she listlessly

 climbed the

 

 stairs and walked into her room.

 

 

 

 

 “Welcome home, Sakura.”said Kero while he was

 playing one of his favorite video games. 

 

 

 

 

 “OhHi , Kero.”said Sakura as she went to

 her desk to start her homework.           

            

 

                    

                                 

                                 

                      

 

 

 Kero flew up to the desk, licking his lips in 

 anticipation of the evening dessert. 

 

 

 

 “Hey, 

 Sakura where's my dessert?!”exclaimed Kero as

 he angrily plopped down on her

 

 desktop.

 

 

 

 

 Sakura looked at Kero with a dazed expression

 and said,“Sorry, Kero-chan. Let me go back

 

 

 downstairs to the kitchen and bring you my share.”

 

 

 

 With heartfelt concern, Kero said, “Don't 

 worry about it, Sakura. You don't seem like your

 usual

 

 self today. What's wrong?”He flexed his 

 tiny biceps and continued, “Is that Li kid making

 

 

 trouble for you? If so, I'll change into my 

 true form and bat him around like a soccer ball!

 

 

 Sakura shook her head and answered,“No, 

 Kero-chan - He's been treating me ok. It's just 

 that

 

 my heart has been feeling like a tick's 

 been sucking the blood out of it until only a 

 withered husk

 

 will remain. Oh Kero-chan, I can't

 put it into words!”concluded Sakura with a 

 sigh.

 

 

 

 Kero thought for a moment with his hand

 balled under his chin. He asked, “When did this 

 feeling

 

 start, Sakura?”

 It started sometime

 after school and continued as I skated along with

 Tomoyo-chan. It has

 

 gotten worse since I got 

 home and I can't figure out what it is!”

 answered Sakura in a frustrated

 

 voice. 

 

 

 

 

 Kero responded,“Calm down, Sakura. Banging 

 your head against a wall won't solve anything.

 

 

 Kero mused,'Since all of the Cards have been 

 sealed and Eriol has left, I don't think it is

 

 

 anything serious. Maybe you just left your 

 recorder at school!”

 

 

 

 Sakura angrily swatted 

 at Kero who nimbly dodged her hand. “It's not 

 that simple, Kero!”yelled

 

 Sakura. “I think 

 this is a premonition, but I just don't know what

 it is about!”

 

 

 

 Kero guiltily looked at Sakura. “I'm sorry for 

 trifling with you, Sakura. I wish

 that I could help

 

 you better with this problem.

 Hey maybe a nice hot bath and a good night's 

 sleep will help you

 

 clear everything up in the 

 morning!”

 

 

 

 

 “You're probably right, Kero-chan.”said 

 Sakura. “And I am sorry I tried to hit you. I 

 know you

 

 were only trying to cheer me up.

 

 

 

 

 Kero puffed out his little chest and said , 

 “Apologies accepted, Sakura. Trust the great and

 

 

 powerful Guardian Beast! All will be well by 

 morning and I'll even forgive you for not 

 bringing

 

 me any dessert!

 

 

 

 Sakura weakly 

 laughed at Kero's posturing and remarks. ”You're

 probably right, Kero-chan and I

 

 am way too out 

 of it to do anything constructive tonight.”

 

 

 

 

                                 

                                 

                                 

          

 

 At The Daidouji Estate:      

                                 

                                 

         

 

                       

                                 

                                 

 

 

 Tomoyo had about five minutes before the 

 camcorder and tape player turned on 

 simultaneously.

 

 She had been secretly rehearsing

 and preparing for this evening's performance for

 over a week.

 

 While completing some minor 

 adjustments to her hair and dress, Tomoyo did 

 another quick run-

 

 thru of where she would stand

 and the words she would sing from the lyrics she

 had

 

 painstakingly written and memorized. She 

 still clung onto the little eraser that Sakura 

 had given

 

 to her at their first encounter. She 

 thought, “Now I can say the words to Sakura that

 I never dared

 

 to say. I can use my camcorder,

 melody, and lyrics that I wrote from my innermost

 heart and

 

 reveal my true feelings this one and 

 only time.”

 

 

 

 'I must perform perfectly.'mused

 Tomoyo as she walked to the small tapedx

 placed on the

 

 floor which divided her bed into 

 symmetrical halves.

 

 

 

 “For my beloved Sakura-

 chan,“whispered Tomoyo. She inhaled deeply and 

 then slowly exhaled

 

 - blowing away the facial 

 masks that she used in her everyday life.

 

 

 

 “Now

 my soul is bare for Sakura-chan to see.”

 

 

 

 The 

 camcorder and tape player clicked on and Tomoyo 

 began ...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 At the Kinomoto home:

 

 

 

 

 Tossing and turning in her bed, Sakura tightly 

 hugged the CardCaptor Sakuradoll that

 

 Tomoyo-

 chan had given her long ago.Beads of perspiration

 rolled down her face and soaked her

 

 pajamas. Her

 features were contorted into looks of pain , 

 distress, and denial. Gasping for air,

 

 Sakura 

 bolted upright in her bed. She opened her eyes 

 and frantically tried to quiet her racing

 

 heart.

 

 

 

 

 “Hoe! what was that all about?”cried 

 Sakura. But like wisps of smoke or fluffy clouds,

 the

 

 nightmare refused to be captured. Trembling,

 Sakura got out of bed and went to her desk. She

 

 

 somehow knew that she had to open the drawer 

 where the Book of the Star Cards was kept.

 

 After

 opening the drawer, Sakura noticed a white light

 coming from the deck. She urgently

 

 pickedthrough

 the pile of Star Cards until she found the source

 of the light. It emanated from the

 

 lastCardthat

 appeared when she had overcome Eriols final 

 challenge. The light was pulsing as

 

 if it were 

 a heart beating. Suddenly, an arrow of light shot

 out of the Card and passed through the

 

 window 

 into the darkness engulfing Tomoeda . The Card 

 flew behind the arrow of light. As the

 

 startled

 Sakura watched these events, her hand 

 accidentally touched the Light and Dark Card. 

 In

 

 an instant, the two spirits of Light and Dark

 materialized and stood before their Mistress.

 

 

 

 

 As always, they were holding each other and 

 looked regal beyond human comprehension.

 

 

 

 In a

 feathery voice, Dark whispered,“Your soul mate's

 heart is at it'sfinal breaking tonight and

 

 will

 soon beat no more in this world. This heart cries

 for mending but is willing to remain

 

 shattered 

 for all time to insure your future happiness.” 

                                 

             

 

                   

                                 

                                 

 

 

 In a similar voice, Light began to speak.“The

 path to that heart is revealed by the arrow of 

 the

 

 last Star Card. Follow the light quickly if

 you wish to mend the Heart which my love Dark 

 doth

 

 speak”

 

 

 

 Before Sakura could inquire about

 their cryptic remarks, Dark and Light disappeared

 into their

 

 Card.

 

 

 

 Sakura frantically grabbed 

 the Key resting between her breasts and spoke 

 the Words of Power to

 

 release it. With cheetah's

 speed, she summoned Fly. White wings burst 

 through her pajama top.

 

 Without changing her

 garments, Sakura opened the window and raced 

 after the last Star Card in

 

 the dark night of 

 Tomoeda. Sakura's heart beat rapidly and she 

 willed her magic to fly as fast as

 

 the winds. 

 “I must find this person!”Sakura thought. “But

 I wonder whom it could be? Is it

 

 Syaoran?“

 

 

 

 At the Daidouji estate:

 

 

 

 

 

 Tomoyo had viewed the completed videotapeseveral

 times. Tears trickled from her lavender

 

 eyes and

 wetted the dress. Lovingly, she enclosed the tape

 and sealed the envelope. In her

 

 beautiful 

 handwriting, the envelope proclaimed'To My 

 Special Someone 'My Only Love -

 

 Sakura-chan'

 

 

 

 

 She sealed the envelope and lifted her sewing

 bag revealing a pair of newly sharpened

 scissors.

 

 With one hand still holding the 

 eraser, Tomoyo firmly grabbed the scissors and 

 walked to her

 

 bed. She laid down and arranged 

 some of her favorite hand-sewn costumes that 

 Sakura had worn

 

 when she was capturing the Clow

 Cards.'But, unfortunately those days are over', 

 thought

 

 Tomoyo. 'Only in my heart do such 

 moments still dwell. Sakura has chosen Syaoran 

 and I never

 

 had the courage to open the gate 

 allowing me entrance into Sakura's heart. He got

 there first.'

 

 whispered Tomoyo as she stared at

 an enlarged photo of Sakura on the ceiling. The 

 picture had

 

 been difficult to place there 

 tonight, but it was worth it. Her tears flowed 

 more freely as she

 

 looked at the picture of 

 Sakura - branding every feature in her heart and

 soul while her right hand

 

 came upwards to her 

 soft pale neck.

 

 

 

 

 Suddenly a light appeared in Tomoyo's 

 darkened room and she quickly sat up from her 

 macabre

 

 position. A surprised Tomoyo saw a 

 Sakura Card spinning in mid-air at the foot of 

 her bed.

 

 Faster and faster it twirled -bathing 

 the whole huge room with a heavenly light and 

 making

 

 Tomoyo feel faint and dizzy even though 

 she was sitting on her bed.

 

 

 

 

 Then the sound of breaking glass filled the

 room as Sakura flew headfirst into Tomoyo's

 

 

 bedroom.“Tomoyo-chan - Tomoyo-chan, what are you

 trying to do?”cried Sakura -bleeding

 

 from 

 several cuts on her arms, hands, and face. With 

 her natural athleticism, Sakura leapt from

 

 the 

 floor and grabbed Tomoyo's wristforcing the 

 steely jaws of the scissors away from her soft

 

 

 neck.

 

 

 

 For the first time, the shocked Tomoyo 

 wore none of her everyday masks and had no 

 cheerful

 

 answers for Sakura's question. Her 

 delicate gasping mouth opened and closed like a 

 land-bound

 

 fish seeking water. Before Tomoyo 

 knew it, the scissors were in Sakura's trembling

 hands. The

 

 emotions of anger, fear, and concern

 warred over the landscape that was 

 Sakura's face

 and

 

 eyes. However, concern with a touch of fear

 and desperation won the battle on Sakura's face.

 Her

 

 wings fluttered weakly and Sakura panted. 

 The cuts from the broken glass burned her nerves.

 She

 

 felt like she would collapse on the floor. 

 Instead, she willed herself to sit by 

 Tomoyo's 

 side and

 

 violently threw the scissors across the

 room.

 

 “Tomoyo-chan Why?”asked Sakura as the

 evening's pent-up emotions in her heart 

 erupted in

 

 full force. The tears flooded from her 

 emerald-green eyes and stung her cuts. She looked

 at

 

 Tomoyo's sad face as if to find the answer 

 there. Tomoyo bent her head to her chest, 

 whispering

 

 softly between sobs the manilla 

 envelope-a videotape-on my bureau...Puzzled, 

 Sakura

 

 squeezed Tomoyo's hands. With one eye on

 Tomoyo, Sakura found the manilla envelope and

 

 

 read Tomoyo's notation

 admiring the lovely 

 handwriting. Tomoyo looked up and saw Sakura's

 

 

 cheek turn fiery red. Sadly, Tomoyo realized that

 all of her plans for Sakura had failed. She was

 

 

 supposed to be dead. She had not anticipated her

 beloved Sakura's dramatic arrival. But instead

 

 

 of dropping the envelope in revulsion, Sakura 

 reverently opened the envelope and tenderly

 

 

 plucked out the videotape. She walked to the VCR,

 turned on the TV, and walked over to

 

 Tomoyo's 

 bed.

 

 

 

 

 “May I sit next to you, Tomoyo-chan?”asked

 Sakura. Tomoyo looked with awe at her beloved

 

 

 and nodded. The empty Card stopped spinning and 

 it's light dimmed enough for the two girls to

 

 

 watch the screen. Sakura held Tomoyo's hand with

 all of her might as the tape started.

 

 

 

 

 

 On the

 TV screen, Tomoyo appeared.'She looks like an 

 angel.'thought Sakura. Tomoyo was

 

 bathed in 

 light and her beautiful voice could be heard.

 

 

 

 

 “Sakura-chanIwanted to give you one final

 gift. It is a song I wrote for you and only you.

 I

 

 know you are crying right now because of my 

 death. I willed for my Mother to give you this

 

 

 video after my private funeral. But please my 

 Sakura-chan. Do not cry for me! My time in this

 

 

 world is done. Your quest for the Clow Cards is 

 complete. Your need for me is over. I only desire

 

 

 your eternal happiness and a joyful future with

 Syaoran. Like your Mother, I will be in Heaven- a

 

 

 Guardian Angel only for you. And when your 

 life's journey is done, I will be waiting for 

 you

 

 with open arms to hug you and loving hands 

 to guide you into Heaven. Maybe there you and I

 

 

 can be in love together because on Earth our Love

 can never be.”,Tomoyo paused- closed her

 

 eyes,

 and clasped her hands to her chest. She inhaled,

 opened her delicate mouth, and began to

 

 sing...

 

 

 Sakura stared at the TV - mesmerized by 

 Tomoyo's lavender eyes and angelic beauty. A 

 blush

 

 bloomed on her cheeks. Her tears freely 

 flowed and a warmth filled her heart and soul. 

 After

 

 finishing the beautiful song, Tomoyo said,

 “I will always be with you My Beloved Sakura-

 chan. I

 

 have loved you since I first saw you in

 Tomoeda Elementary and this eraser has been the 

 most

 

 precious gift I have ever received because

 it came from you”Tomoyo whispered as she

 

 

 lowered her praying hands and opened one 

 revealing the plain rubber eraser. This is only a

 

 

 temporary separation, My Love. I am just going

 ahead of you to my destiny.Tomoyo's armsspread

 wide as if to engulf Sakura. A smile appeared on

 her face. However, her lavender eyes

 

 seemed to 

 lose their color.“Sayonara Sakura-chan I will

 watch over you and Love you

 

 forever.”Tomoyo 

 knelt on the carpet as if to pray slowly the 

 picture blurred and faded away

 

 into oblivion.

 

 

 

 

 Sakura's heart bled more freely than any 

 lacerations from the broken window could do. 

 Crying,

 

 Sakura

 

 thought,'I've hurt Tomoyo-chan

 so deeply.'Though her heart was bleeding from 

 sadness and

 

 regret, Sakura felt the seed of love

 that she had always had for Tomoyo sprout and 

 grow

 

 watered and sunned by Tomoyo'srevelation.

 “So Dark and Light were talking about Tomoyo-

 

 

 chan!”thought Sakura. “She has been suffering 

 all of this time because her love for me was

 

 

 never returned by me for her. I -I am responsible

 for breaking her heart again and again - until it

 

 

 shattered and made her want to end her life..“

 

 

 

 

 Sakura turned to face Tomoyo. Tomoyo had not

 moved since Sakura had come to her bed. Her

 

 hand

 limply rested in Sakura's grip. Her head was 

 still lowered and tears dripped from her

 

 cheeks.

 Sakure gently removed her hand from Tomoyo'sand

 reached for Tomoyo's face.

 

 Tomoyo cringed at 

 Sakura's tender touch - anticipating a face 

 filled with revulsion and anger.

 

 Sakura cupped 

 Tomoyo's cheeks and slowly lifted her head so 

 she could look deep into

 

 Tomoyo's lavender eyes.

 Tomoyo looked at Sakura's face and was stunned by

 the love and

 

 tenderness that gleamed from the 

 emerald green eyes.

 

 		

 

 “Sakura-chan...?“

 whispered Tomoyo. With loving motion, Sakura 

 pulled Tomoyo's face to her

 

 own and gave Tomoyo

 a passionate kiss. Tomoyo's fragile body wilted 

 under the kiss. Her arms

 

 reached around Sakura's

 waist and hugged her tightlylike a drowning 

 sailor would to a life-line.

 

 Sakura's hands 

 stroked Tomoyo's cheeks and fingered her glossy 

 lavender hair. Her slender body

 

 pressed against

 Tomoyo's and eased her body to a prone position.

 Tomoyo's eyes fluttered and

 

 she realized that 

 sometime during this magical waking dream her 

 dress had disappeared from her

 

 pale body. “Have

 I died and reached my ideal vision of Heaven?” 

 thought Tomoyo.“My Sakura-

 

 chan is in my armskissing me, loving me...Healing me!”

 

 

 

 Suddenly

 Tomoyo's lavender eyes opened and drank up the 

 sight of her Beloved Sakura pressing

 

 against 

 her. The Card Mistress was smiling at Tomoyo. Her

 naked body glistened from her

 

 exertions to 

 reach out and mend Tomoyo's heart with the Glue 

 of Love.“Tomoyo-chan...I'm

 

 sorry for all of 

 your pain and suffering.”whispered Sakura. 

 “It's all my fault!”cried Sakura as

 

 tears mixed

 with the bloody cuts on her face.

 

 

 

 With 

 surprising strength, the porcelain-skinned Tomoyo

 forced Sakura to sit upright on the large

 

 bed. 

 “My Beloved Sakura-chan!”cried Tomoyo “You came

 to save me, but you've injured

 

 yourself! Please

 let me treat your cuts!

 

 

 

 

 “Oh Tomoyo-chan My Love,“roclaimed Sakura 

 her emerald green eyes sparkling with

 

 Love and

 Happiness. 

 

 

 

 Tomoyo quickly kissed her Sakura-

 chan and ran to her bathroom.             

                       

 

          

                                 

                                 

                                 

 

 

 As she waited for Tomoyo, Sakura gazed at the 

 empty Star Card. It had stopped spinning and it's

 

 

 light was pulsing like a human heartbeat. 

 Sakura bowed her head to the Star Cardandquietly

 

 

 thanked it as well as Dark and Lightforshowing

 her the path to her One True Love.

 

 

 

 

 Tomoyo returned with a moistened towel, a 

 first-aid kit, and two sets of softlinenpajamas.

 “Ok

 

 Sakura-don't move,”said Tomoyo.FirstTomoyo

 looked over Sakura's body with piercing

 

 lavender

 eyes. She nodded and began to lick and kiss 

 Sakura's cuts and scrapes. Sakura swooned

 

 in 

 bliss. Tomoyo gently patted each wound with the 

 warm wet towel. She tenderly applied

 

 antibiotic

 ointment and bandages to each wound - pouring her

 love for Sakura into every

 

 movement. Satisfied 

 that her work was completed to perfection, Tomoyo

 said, “I think I treated

 

 all of your cuts, My 

 Beloved Sakura-chan. But do you hurt anywhere 

 that I can't see? Do I need

 

 to call foradoctor?”

 

 

 

 

 Sakura answered, “No but thank you My 

 Tomoyo-chan. I don't need a doctor. But I do need

 

 

 You My LoveMy Tomoyo!“

 

 

 

 Tomoyo beamed as 

 brightly as the empty Star Card. She gently 

 embraced Sakura and kissed her.

 

 “Oh My Beloved 

 Sakura-chan!”cried Tomoyo. “How often have I 

 dreamed of hearing those

 

 words from you and of 

 being your Love!“

 

 

 

 Sakura hugged Tomoyo and 

 kissed her.“If you can ever forgive me Tomoyo-

 chan, I will promise

 

 you that your daysof

 loneliness and suffering will never return 

 because you are My Soul Mate-

 

 My Beloved-My 

 Tomoyo-chan.”confessed Sakura. “I want to be 

 yours - Forever.”

 

 

 

 Tomoyo cried with tears of

 pure happiness. “My Dearest Sakura-chan, you have

 made my dearest

 

 wish come true!”

 

 

 

 With love 

 and happiness, Tomoyo and Sakura embraced once 

 more and Magic flared in the

 

 bedroom. The broken

 window was miraculously restored. The Star Card 

 brightened and slowly

 

 faded. However, it's face

 was no longer empty because it now bore a 

 hologram of Sakura and

 

 Tomoyo kissing and 

 embracing each other and over their heads 

 floated a red Valentine-

 

 shaped Heart.

 

 

 

 

 THE END

 

 

 

 

 

 

 Author's comments:

 

 

 

 I was hoping to write the 

 lyrics of Tomoyo'ssong for you. The words were 

 clear in my dream.

 

 However, Dawn's light faded 

 the verses into obscurity. Maybe it's better that

 way so you - the

 

 reader - can imagine your own 

 lyrics to Tomoyo's song of love confessed but 

 unrequited on

 

 Earth, of her plea for Sakura's 

 mortal happiness in spite of her suicide, of 

 Tomoyo's wish of

 

 being Sakura's Guardian Angel 

 throughout her mortal days and immortal life, and

 of her final

 

 words of goodbye to Sakura. I know

 I am not a CCS expert like many better writers 

 and fans of

 

 the anime and manga, but I hope you

 will forgive any inconsistencies in this fanfic 

 and enjoy it as

 

 it is written.           

                                 

                                 

                 

 

                

                                 

                                 

       

 

 Humbly yours, Joe Saunders at 

 rphjas@lycos.com