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1 Tomoyo and the Visitor
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2 A Tomoyo and Sakura Story
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3 By G. P.
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4 Please send comments to: treeandleaf2002@yahoo.com
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5
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6 Note: all names and characters are property of CLAMP. This story is
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7 in no way meant to infringe on their intellectual property rights.
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8
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9 I.
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10 Tomoyo first heard it while reading in the garden: a faint shuffling
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11 noise by the big beech tree. She rose and walked over, looking for
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12 the source of the sound. Then it moved, a small feathery body
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13 flopping in the short grass. Leaning over, she saw a little orange-
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14 brown bird with black wings, not quite a fledgling, cheeping in
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15 fright. She looked up into the leafy branches of the tree, shading
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16 her lavender eyes from the midday sun, but could see no nest.
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17 Kneeling, Tomoyo undid the blue ribbon of her straw bonnet and used
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18 it to deftly scoop up the tiny creature. It was noisy, active, and
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19 did not seem to be hurt. Gazing at the lost little bird, she felt an
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20 odd kinship. Smiling, she whispered,
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21
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22 “You almost look ready to fly. I’ll ask Mother if you can stay until
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23 you’re ready.”
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24
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25 Cradling the bonnet, she walked to the house and opened the massive
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26 front door. Her footsteps echoed as she walked the long hallway to
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27 the stairs. Bounding into her room, she placed bird and bonnet on her
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28 dresser and pulled up a chair. As she contemplated the tiny creature,
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29 it regarded at her with large, watchful eyes. Then it began to chirp,
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30 moving about in the bonnet, eyes fixed on Tomoyo, who said to herself,
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31
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32 “You’re hungry, aren’t you? First let me see just what you are, and
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33 then we’ll see what you want to eat”.
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34
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35 With a smile she rushed downstairs to the library, and rushed back
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36 clutching her Firudo Gaido Nihon no Yacho, A Field Guide to the Birds
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37 of Japan. Looking at the bird, half expecting it to be gone, she
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38 scanned the colored plates to try and identify it
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39
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40 "It's a hawfinch, cocothraustes cocothraustes, of the Fringillidae
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41 family". Tomoyo carefully sounded out the difficult Latin words.
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42 "Your name is bigger than you are", Tomoyo giggled to herself. She
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43 read on, "‘they are shy birds, spending most of their time hidden in
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44 the treetops eating seeds and caterpillars'. I guess grubs would be
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45 OK for you. I'll be right back!" She flew downstairs, to beg one of
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46 the guards to take her to the pet shop. Already, she was in love with
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47 it.
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48
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49 II.
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50 The next day Tomoyo, practically beaming, asked Sakura during lunch,
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51 "Would you like to come to my house after school? There's something I
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52 wanted to show you".
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53
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54 Sakura, intrigued, nodded her head and replied, "Sure. Let me call
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55 my Father to see if it's OK. I don't have any chores today".
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56
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57 After homeroom was dismissed, Sakura walked out with her friend and
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58 saw a single, darkly garbed bodyguard standing by the black Cadillac.
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59 The guard opened the back door, bowing low, her long, brown hair
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60 hanging straight down. When Sakura clambered in, she was surprised by
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61 the roominess of the car's interior. As the car sped away, she turned
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62 to Tomoyo and said,
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63
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64 "What did you want to show me?"
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65
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66 Tomoyo smiled broadly, "You'll see"
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67
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68 Tomoyo glanced at her friend, delighted by her intense curiosity.
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69 Tomoyo loved surprises, and the sweet anticipation they caused. She
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70 snuggled into the plush seat, thought about Sakura, and the hawfinch,
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71 and felt a wonderful glow.
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72
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73
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74 III.
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75 Sakura gazed at the little bird, hopping merrily in its large,
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76 silver cage. Her eyes widened as she exclaimed,
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77
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78 "Kawaii! Tomoyo-chan, it is sooooo cute!"
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79
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80 Tomoyo tilted her head and smiled brightly as Sakura asked, "Did you
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81 give it a name yet?"
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82
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83 Tomoyo shook her head no, and in a conspiratorial whisper, as if the
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84 young bird would be embarrassed to hear such a thing, answered,
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85
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86 "I don't know if it's a boy or a girl".
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87
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88 Puzzled, Sakura blurted out,
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89
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90 "How can you tell?"
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91
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92 Tomoyo blushed and looked at the floor, whispering,
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93
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94 "I...I don't really know"
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95
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96 Sakura, realizing what she was asking, blushed, hid the nervous
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97 giggle behind her hand and whispered,
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98
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99 "S..sorry"
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100
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101 Tomoyo looked up, all smiles, took her hand, and asked.
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102
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103 "Would you like some tea?"
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104
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105 And the two girls raced down together to the massive kitchen.
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106
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107
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108 IV.
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109
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110 Over the next week, Tomoyo spent hours with the little bird. She
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111 sketched it, painted it, carefully weighed and measured it's food,
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112 cleaned the cage, and overall attended it with more care than the
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113 most doting of mothers. Most of all, she loved to just sit and watch
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114 as the hawfinch explored it's cage, played with the little golden
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115 bell she bought, and gamely tested its wings in a flurry of flapping.
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116 She knew it would be ready to fly soon, and though she would miss her
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117 companion, she grew excited at the thought of the fledging soaring
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118 into the vast, open sky. After a nearly-rushed dinner, she excused
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119 herself to go to bed, ran upstairs, and burst through the bedroom
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120 door. There, she found the bird dead.
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121
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122 At first, she thought it asleep, though in an odd, twisted posture.
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123 But looking closely, she realized it had suddenly, inexplicably died.
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124 Staring, she put her hand to her heart and felt her legs weakening.
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125 It couldn't be...it had been gaily hopping and chirping just before
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126 dinner. With a shaking hand she opened the door to the cage and, with
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127 a slender finger, lightly nudged the warm, stiff lump, which slid
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128 slightly on the bottom of the cage. She turned away, stunned,
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129 sickened, her eyesight graying on the periphery, as she felt queasy
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130 and faint. Just then, the phone rang.
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131
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132 She reeled backwards, mechanically reaching for the pink cell phone
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133 and holding it to her ear.
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134
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135 Sakura stood puzzled when the phone was picked up with no greeting.
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136
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137 "Hello? Tomoyo-chan?"
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138
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139 Silence.
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140
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141 "Tomoyo-chan, are you there? Are you all right?"
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142
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143 Trembling, Tomoyo exclaimed in a rush,
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144
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145 "Sakura-chan it's dead I...I… oh Sakura-chan I'm sorry it's all
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146 right don't worry it's all right it's..."
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147 Tomoyo broke off in a fit of sobbing.
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148
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149 "Tomoyo-chan, what's the matter, are you all right?" Sakura shouted
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150 out as the phone went dead.
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151
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152 Tomoyo sat on her bed; fists clenched into tight little balls,
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153 weeping hysterically. It was so young, just ready to fly. Why? Why
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154 did it die now? Why, with a whole life ahead of it, why did it have
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155 to die? Before it could even fly it was dead. The overwhelming
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156 unfairness of it all staggered her. She sat crying, unheard in the
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157 vast, empty house. Unable to move or see through her tears, she only
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158 barely heard the frantic pounding on her window. Turning, she saw
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159 Sakura perched on the ledge outside her room, wings disappearing from
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160 her staff as she prepared to break through the glass. The sight of
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161 the auburn-haired girl threw Tomoyo into a blind panic. She rushed to
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162 the window and opened it carefully, taking Sakura by the hand as she
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163 stepped into the room. By habit she smiled brightly, but the words
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164 wouldn't come, and the tears wouldn't stop.
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165
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166 Sakura beheld her friend in fear and wonder. Never, ever had she
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167 seen Tomoyo like this. Always cheerful, always composed and never,
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168 ever sad, the dark-haired girl looked shattered as her smile
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169 dissolved in a renewed flood of tears. She turned away from Sakura,
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170 arms flailing as if to ward her off. Hysterically she begged,
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171
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172 "Sakura-chan go away please go away I'm sorry please please please!"
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173
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174 Tomoyo shut her eyes tightly as a tempest of emotions raged inside
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175 her. The sudden death of the little bird still tore at her in a raw,
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176 uncontrollable grief. But for Sakura to see her like this was even
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177 worse. Never, ever had she allowed Sakura even a glimpse of her
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178 private sorrow, or of the passionate love that lay unrequited for so
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179 long. She had dedicated herself to her beautiful friend, and vowed
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180 never to burden her beloved with her own sadness or longing. And if
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181 most of the time her joy at just being with Sakura was genuine, it
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182 was sometimes a mask to hide her own hurt, and protect the precious
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183 happiness of her one, true love. But now, she had hurt Sakura through
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184 her grief for the bird. Struggle as she might, the little creature's
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185 death was a pain she could not still, a bitter cup that overflowed
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186 and spilled over. Her mask shattered, she felt naked and ashamed and
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187 alone. Better she were dead than this.
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188
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189 Sakura stood with her arms at her side, utterly helpless as Tomoyo
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190 huddled in the corner. The sight was wrenching, and Sakura was at a
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191 loss. Glancing about the room, she saw the door of the silver
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192 birdcage open, and the motionless, feathered form within. Looking at
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193 her still sobbing friend she understood, and felt her own heart break
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194 for Tomoyo's loss. And if she did not comprehend all of Tomoyo's
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195 grief, or it's secret cause (which was Sakura herself), she knew
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196 enough to run to her love and enfold her in her arms.
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197
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198 "I'm so sorry, Tomoyo-chan. I'm so sorry it had to die."
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199
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200 Tomoyo felt the warm presence wrapped around her, melting the icy
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201 pain in a passionate, loving hug. On her cheek the warm wet of her
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202 tears mingled with Sakura's own as her friend held her tightly.
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203 Sakura's love cut through the haze of guilt and shame like a fiery
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204 sword. Tomoyo turned and shifted, laying her head on Sakura's
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205 shoulder, hugging her tightly. How strange it was that she felt such
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206 comfort here in the arms of her love, when seconds ago the mere
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207 presence of the girl had thrown her into a horrified frenzy. Her iron
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208 guard for once lowered, she gave herself up to the sadness, and
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209 softly wept for the little bird. As the shadows of night covered them
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210 they lay in a bittersweet embrace, hearts beating together till sleep
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211 stole their pain away.
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212
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213 Tomoyo awoke to the twittering of birds, and bright sunlight
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214 streaming through the open window. She smiled to find Sakura in her
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215 arms, still asleep. She remembered the hurt of the bird's death, and
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216 felt the echo of grief deep inside. But Sakura's magic was not only
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217 in the Cards, for she had blessed Tomoyo with the solace of her love.
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218 As the dark lashes fluttered, Tomoyo kissed her tenderly on the
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219 forehead. Waking, she smiled, and then looked at Tomoyo with sudden
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220 concern. But Tomoyo smiled back and whispered,
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221
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222 "I'm OK now. Thank you, Sakura-chan. Thank you so much."
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223
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224 Sakura gazed into the deep blue eyes and then smiled again. Slowly
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225 the two rose, slightly stiff from sleeping on the floor. Sakura
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226 looked at the window, and the sun, and froze.
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227
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228 "Hoeee, what if oniichan goes to wake me up for breakfast?"
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229
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230 Tomoyo giggled, and whispered, "You’d better go."
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231
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232 Sakura looked at her uncertainly.
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233
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234 "Smiling, Tomoyo said, "I'm all right, really. It's still a little
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235 sad, but I'm all right."
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236
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237 Sakura looked wistfully at her friend and hugged her tightly. She
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238 looked out the window and saw a bank of low clouds that would hide
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239 her flight home. With another hug they parted, and Sakura flew
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240 through the window as Tomoyo watched in awe. Then, turning with a
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241 sigh, she looked at the cage, and wondered what to do.
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242
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243 Her Mother, home for a rare weekend without work, sensibly placed
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244 the hawfinch in a plastic bag and put it in the refrigerator. Tomoyo
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245 made the preparations, starting with a small pouch. She was unsteady
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246 in needlepoint, but her Mother helped with the more complex stitches.
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247 She talked on the phone with Sakura several times that day,
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248 reassuring her that things were fine. As they worked, Tomoyo asked
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249 her mother in an anguished voice why something so sweet and innocent
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250 had to die before it had even flown. For a long time, Sonomi sat
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251 silent as she worked the needle and thread. Finally, she looked up
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252 and said,
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253
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254 " I asked that when Nadesico was dying. I asked her. Through all the
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255 pain she smiled at me and said,
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256
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257 'But Sonomi-chan, we're just visitors here. We can't stay forever' “
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258
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259 The two sat in silence while Sonomi cut and tied the last thread and
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260 held up the finished work.
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261
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262 "There, all done."
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263
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264 At sunset, Tomoyo gently took the little bird from the bag and
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265 wrapped it in a white silk scarf. Placing the cold, enshrouded body
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266 in the pouch, she took a small shovel from the tool shed and dug a
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267 little hole under the tree. Kneeling, she carefully laid the pouch in
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268 the warm earth and looked one last time at the design, a needlepoint
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269 hawfinch soaring through a cloudless sky. Then she patted the dirt
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270 down and stood with lowered head and folded hands. With eyes closed,
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271 she thanked the little visitor, and begged it to find peace here
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272 under the beech tree. Turning, the little girl left the gathering
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273 dark to go find her mother, and to cry.
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274
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275
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