rlm@2: WARNINGS: There are no sexually explicit scenes in this, but sex is discussed quite openly. LIME warning. The rlm@2: sex discussed is guys with guys, and girls with girls. YAOI and YURI warning. This openly mocks romantic and rlm@2: lemon fan material. PARODY warning. There are refrences to 10 year old girls having sex, for the sake of humor. rlm@2: SEX AMONGST CHILDREN warning. I'll repeat, though, that this is a PARODY PARODY PARODY PARODY rlm@2: PARODY. I'm NOT advocating child pornography. rlm@2: Now, for all of you that weren't scared off (all two of you), here's the fic. rlm@2: ************** rlm@2: "To-ya, I can't wait any longer, I must tell you! I love you!" rlm@2: "What, do you really mean that, Yuki?" rlm@2: "Oh yes, To-ya, oh yes, I do. With all my heart. Hold me, my love." rlm@2: "With the greatest of pleasures, Yuki-chan. May I call you that?" rlm@2: "Only if I may call you To-ya-chan." rlm@2: In perfect synch, their lips, the texture of a morning glory, came together. Their emotions were as pure as the rlm@2: crystalline dewdrops on the leaves of a morning glory. But quickly a blush came to their cheeks, and they split. rlm@2: Their inexperience made them shy. rlm@2: "My happiness is complete," sighed Yukito. "Now I can spend the rest of my like dedicating myself to you. All that rlm@2: will matter to me now is you, and only you." rlm@2: "I will think only of you," promised Touya. rlm@2: "We will be together forever, I know it." rlm@2: "Yes, beyond eternity, for every lifetime after and before." rlm@2: Yukito's delicate features turned to pale horror. "What, my love, have I said something wrong?" rlm@2: "No, you could never be wrong. It is I. Before you pledge yourself to me, I must tell you my horrible secret." rlm@2: "Yuki-chan, you have kept a secret from me? You have hurt me, and the pain is scratching away at my heart." rlm@2: Yukito wept. "Oh, forgive me! I never wanted to bring you anything but joy and delight. The truth is, I don't even rlm@2: know what my secret it. All I know is that there is something dreadfully different about me, but I'm not sure what." rlm@2: Touya laughed. "I already know that." rlm@2: "Really?" rlm@2: "Sure. You're not human." rlm@2: "Is that all? Whew, what a relief. I thought it was something important." rlm@2: "Let us forget these trivialities. Come, let's go to your house to lose our virginity, in exactly half an hour since our rlm@2: first kiss." rlm@2: "Be careful with me, To-ya-chan. I am frightened of pain, but desire the pleasure, and feel some odd compulsion to rlm@2: satisfy your every whim." rlm@2: "I will be as careful with you as I would be when break an egg shell." rlm@2: "Oh, To-ya-chan." rlm@2: "Oh, Yuki-chan." rlm@2: They kiss passionately, this time with no reserve, and there is doubt whether they will get so far as Yukito's house. rlm@2: But, to the disappointment of all, they only reached second base before they were interrupted. rlm@2: "Hello, onii-chan! Hi, Yukito-san. Hey, why are your shirts open?" Sakura asked. She was holding the hand of an rlm@2: euphoric Tomoyo. The grins on their faces were wide and sloppy. One might assume they saw hickeys on the girls' rlm@2: necks, but then quickly wave that thought as ridiculous, since they are, after all, only ten years old. rlm@2: Yukito was not in the slightest thrown off by Sakura's observant eyes. "Oh, To-ya-chan and I were just making out. rlm@2: Tomoyo, what are you staring at?" rlm@2: "I love Sakura-chan," the girl chanted, in a disturbing stoned-like manner, "And she loves me. I love taking pictures rlm@2: of Sakura-chan. I love kissing Sakura-chan. I love taking pictures of Sakura-chan kissing me. I love Sakura-chan. rlm@2: And she loves me. I love Sakura-chan's body. I love taking pictures. I love taking pictures of Sakura-chan's–" Sakura rlm@2: gave her lover a coy smile, which shut Tomoyo up. The dark haired girl turned [further] into a blubbery mass of love rlm@2: for Sakura. rlm@2: "Tomoyo-chan and I had wild, lesbian sex just ten minutes ago," Sakura explained, "and we even got it on tape! rlm@2: We're going to Tomoyo-chan's house to watch it on her gigantic screen while we fuck each other again like the rlm@2: nymphomaniacs we are. Wanna come?" rlm@2: "Maybe some other time. At the moment, Yuki-chan and I would like to make passionate love." rlm@2: "Oh, I see." rlm@2: "Sakura-chan," Tomoyo thought aloud in a dreamy voice, "I have this adorable outfit I made just for you. It's this rlm@2: pink leather bodice with bunny ears, full of frills and bows. Would you wear it while we...?" rlm@2: "Of course! You know I love showing myself off to you. Would you like me to before we–" rlm@2: "Oh, yes, please! And then..." rlm@2: The two ran off, for waiting any longer would be impossible. rlm@2: Yukito sighed. "Isn't love beautiful?" rlm@2: "Quite, my little snuggle bunny. But enough about my sister and her sex-crazed lover . We have our own loving to rlm@2: do." rlm@2: "Yes, we much catch up with them. Kiss me, To-ya-chan." rlm@2: "What, here, in the middle of the street?" rlm@2: "Right here, right now. It's more exciting like this." rlm@2: "Oh, Yuki-chan." rlm@2: "Oh, To-ya-chan." rlm@2: A storm of flowers encompassed them as they embraced and learned true happiness. rlm@2: ~Fini~ rlm@2: Next Episode on Voltarian Mush! Will Touya and Yukito have heart-to-heart talks about how much they love each rlm@2: other? Will Sakura and Tomoyo have animal sex five times in six pages, or only four? And will Syaoran join in on rlm@2: the fun? Maybe! But we promise, there will be no Kero-chan! So tune in for the next, never-to-come, Voltarian rlm@2: Mush! rlm@2: ************** rlm@2: I wrote the first half of this after I got a couple of frustrating messages on the ccs yaoi ml based on my ‘Nothing rlm@2: Personal' fic, complaining that I had mangled the characters. But I do not think I wrote the characters any more out rlm@2: of character than in the sappy fics that these same people gushed over. I love a mushy fic just as much as the next rlm@2: person, but that doesn't mean that they're not any less true to the original story than, say, an angsty fic or a crossover. rlm@2: The story is meant to be humorous, do not get offended insulted. ;) rlm@2: -- Lizabell Waters rlm@2: lizabellwaters@hotmail.com rlm@2: