rlm@2: Dear Sakura
rlm@2: by Amazoness Duo and G.P.
rlm@2: amazonessduo@hotmail.com
rlm@2: pearsong1954@yahoo.com
rlm@2: 
rlm@2: 
rlm@2: Dear Tomoyo-chan,
rlm@2: 
rlm@2: At our house there is a vine in the garden. It has been there for
rlm@2: many years, since I was a child. Most people do not pay attention to
rlm@2: it, for it looks like a dead bush, and is overshadowed by the many
rlm@2: gaudy flowers around. it. It is called a "peniocereus gregii", or
rlm@2: Night-Blooming Cereus. When I was six, my Mother told me about this
rlm@2: flower. She told me because I was not happy so much about my
rlm@2: appearance. I did not feel as pretty as my sisters at the time, and
rlm@2: was sad. So, Mother took me into the garden and showed me this most
rlm@2: pathetic looking little plant. I remember this surprisingly well. She
rlm@2: asked me, "Fanren, what do you see here?" I told her I saw a plain
rlm@2: looking plant. She answered, "You see with the eyes of a fool, who
rlm@2: looks once and knows nothing. Watch this plant at night". In our
rlm@2: family, when Mother speaks it is wise to listen. This is true in many
rlm@2: Chinese households, you know, but is especially true in ours. I could
rlm@2: tell you many amusing stories about this. 
rlm@2: 
rlm@2: So, in the middle of summer, with no school to worry about, I went
rlm@2: into the garden each night to watch the plant. There was nothing much
rlm@2: to see, but I was not only obedient, but also very curious. Then one
rlm@2: night, a thing most amazing happened. I had nearly fallen asleep when
rlm@2: I noticed the little buds on the twiggy stems seemed to have moved.
rlm@2: To my wonder and astonishment, they blossomed that night into the
rlm@2: most beauteous flowers I have ever seen. They were like pale stars
rlm@2: with a golden center, delicate and intricate with a fragrant scent
rlm@2: that wafted over the entire garden. I stared at them all night, at
rlm@2: that beauty which had been hidden during the day. How easy it would
rlm@2: have been to miss them entirely. It was magical to share that warm
rlm@2: summer night with the beautiful flowers, but with the first ray of
rlm@2: light at dawn the petals withered and the blossoms dropped to the
rlm@2: ground. That morning I talked to Mother, and told her of the wonder I
rlm@2: had seen. I asked her if it would bloom again that night, for I very
rlm@2: much wanted to see it once more. She shook her head, and said the
rlm@2: plant only bloomed one night every year. She said that sometimes the
rlm@2: most radient beauty is hidden away, and can only be seen by those
rlm@2: with patient hearts.
rlm@2: 
rlm@2: This was a good lesson for me, as I was not a patient girl. I am
rlm@2: still not the most patient of women, as my family would no doubt tell
rlm@2: you. So perhaps this lesson did not work as well as Mother may have
rlm@2: intended. But what I have always remembered is the surprise of seeing
rlm@2: such beauty so unexpectedly. I felt that delightful surprise when I
rlm@2: first saw you and Sakura-chan at our house those many years ago.
rlm@2: Aiyaaa, I do not think I have ever seen such adorable girls in all of
rlm@2: my life. And then, to my astonishment, there was Sakura's brother and
rlm@2: his most attractive companion. Such splendor was enough to break
rlm@2: one's heart. I felt like this again during your most recent visit. I
rlm@2: knew from the picture that Sakura-chan showed me that you were very
rlm@2: beautiful. I thought surely you were a model, or perhaps an actress.
rlm@2: But I was not quite prepared for you in person. Tomoyo-chan, I was
rlm@2: enchanted. 
rlm@2: 
rlm@2: Mother can be very cruel, for when I told her this she said I am
rlm@2: always being enchanted. She is maybe perhaps right, I suppose. Mother
rlm@2: says I am too fickle, and like a bee dance about from flower to
rlm@2: flower, never working hard enough to gather any pollen. Or perhaps
rlm@2: she is frustrated that I have never married. But you are a flower
rlm@2: this little bee has been unable to forget. You are of course a most
rlm@2: beautiful woman. I do not have skill enough with words in this
rlm@2: language to speak of it properly. But seeing you kept me up at night,
rlm@2: and I longed to be with you. I have known many beautiful girls and
rlm@2: women, but most of them are tedious. Often their attractiveness is
rlm@2: dimmed by their vanity, and I quickly grow tired of their
rlm@2: companionship. But your company was delightful. You are bright, and
rlm@2: charming, and most witty. Your loveliness is so natural, as if you
rlm@2: were blithely unaware of it. Somehow that only makes you more
rlm@2: attractive. 
rlm@2: 
rlm@2: I am sorry. I have been writing this while looking at pictures of
rlm@2: you Sakura has given me. They are quite terribly distracting, and I
rlm@2: should put them away so that I may finish this letter. But I will
rlm@2: not, because they are wonderful to look at. Thank you so very much
rlm@2: for them. Anyway, I quite fell under your spell. I appreciate that
rlm@2: you are telling me that you are bound to Sakura-chan. However, I
rlm@2: could see this for myself, as you look at her with such tender
rlm@2: regard. It is curious, because from the way Sakura-chan talked about
rlm@2: you, I had assumed the two of you were once lovers. She speaks of you
rlm@2: with such affection and awe. But oddly, she later seemed quite
rlm@2: perplexed by what I was hinting at. She is most deliciously cute when
rlm@2: she is confused about things, is she not? I was even further baffled
rlm@2: myself when I saw the two of you together during your visit. Your
rlm@2: love was most charmingly evident, but she did not seem to quite
rlm@2: understand it all. It was very baffling to me, though perhaps I
rlm@2: understand more now after your letters. Yet I wonder if anyone really
rlm@2: knows Sakura-chan's heart just now? 
rlm@2: 
rlm@2: Thank you for your most forthright honesty. Though it is beautiful,
rlm@2: it saddens me somewhat that your love is so constant. I myself feel a
rlm@2: longing for you, and know your presence would brighten life up quite
rlm@2: a bit. But most of all I am sad for your heart that has no rest, and
rlm@2: knows such pain. Sakura herself is in a turmoil these days. She is
rlm@2: always talking about you, and sighs when she speaks your name. I have
rlm@2: heard her crying at night, in the kitchen and the garden. She misses
rlm@2: you so, and is much like a little lost child without her mother. I
rlm@2: hope that all goes well with your plan to fade away from her life.
rlm@2: What you say is very logical indeed, and must certainly be true. But
rlm@2: hearts are strange, and sometimes what we think does not seem to
rlm@2: matter to them. They are impertinent, and have their own way of
rlm@2: things. Maybe I am sympathetic with hearts, for they are like me bit,
rlm@2: yes?   
rlm@2: 
rlm@2: Being with you was a most delightful surprise, for if our meeting
rlm@2: was as brief as the Cereus blossom, it was also as beautiful. I will
rlm@2: pray for you and Sakura-chan at the temple today. May all the gods
rlm@2: and spirits protect your hearts.
rlm@2: 
rlm@2: 
rlm@2: My best regards,
rlm@2: 
rlm@2: Fanren
rlm@2: 
rlm@2: PS- I will be in Tokyo next year, and will most gladly accompany you
rlm@2: to the local clubs in Tomoeda. Aiyaaa, I cannot wait to dance with
rlm@2: you!        
rlm@2: 
rlm@2: 
rlm@2: Dear Fanren-san,
rlm@2: 	What you said about the Night-Blooming Cereus was beautiful. Ieran-
rlm@2: sama is a very wise and knowledgable woman. It's true that if your
rlm@2: heart is patient enough, you can find the most stunning beauty. I'm
rlm@2: very lucky that it didn't take me long to find it. But it certainly
rlm@2: caught me by surprise. I had never dreamed that I would discover such
rlm@2: a gorgeous creature on this planet, not just in her appearance, but
rlm@2: also in her shining spirit. It was almost too much for me at the
rlm@2: time. I remember coming home and lying in my bed, staring up at the
rlm@2: ceiling in amazement, my heart lost in confusion at the sheer bliss
rlm@2: that the cute girl at school had stirred within me. I didn't get much
rlm@2: sleep that night. Actually, I haven't gotten much sleep since that
rlm@2: night. There have always been costumes I have designed just so I
rlm@2: could see her in them, videotapes to watch her actions from times
rlm@2: long since passed, and thoughts of her to keep me from sleep's gentle
rlm@2: embrace. 
rlm@2: 	But you are right. Patience is necessary to see the beauty that is
rlm@2: so often hidden right in front of us. I know that patience certainly
rlm@2: helped with Sakura-chan. Sometimes it takes her a while to understand
rlm@2: things, but I was happy to wait for realization to dawn upon her,
rlm@2: helping her gently along the way. You're also right about how cute
rlm@2: Sakura-chan can be when she's confused. I always loved seeing her
rlm@2: like that. In the end, Sakura-chan always wound up fixing things. She
rlm@2: has an awe-inspiring determination that is really unstoppable when it
rlm@2: comes out. I don't know if you've had a chance to see it, but her
rlm@2: eyes sparkle like emeralds when it takes hold of her.
rlm@2: 	Thank you for letting me tell you all this. I can't tell Sakura-
rlm@2: chan because I don't want to burden her with any of it. It has helped
rlm@2: quite a bit to be able to talk to you. I don't think you're fickle at
rlm@2: all. I think that your heart wanders. But when you find the right
rlm@2: person, the one who holds your heart, then it will stop its journey.
rlm@2: I hope that you find this person soon. You are a very delightful
rlm@2: woman and I think anyone would be extremely lucky to have your
rlm@2: company.   
rlm@2: 	I'm sending this at the same time as I send my final letter to
rlm@2: Sakura-chan. It pains me so much to do so, but I know I have to. The
rlm@2: thought that I'll never see her again tears at my heart. It was so
rlm@2: hard to see through the tears while I wrote it. I'm lucky I didn't
rlm@2: have to tell Sakura-chan in person because I don't think I could
rlm@2: have. I already miss her terribly. My heart will always belong to
rlm@2: her, no matter where she is. Please keep an eye on her for me. Her
rlm@2: happiness means everything to me. I can't stay or I'll ruin that
rlm@2: happiness. If she continues looking, she may unravel her new life
rlm@2: because of me. I couldn't bear to see her lose all of that. And even
rlm@2: if she quit searching, I don't think my heart would last much longer
rlm@2: if I stayed in her life. I wanted to fade out slower, to disappear so
rlm@2: that I would only be a distant memory to her. But I can't. I'm afraid
rlm@2: that everything is too close to the edge. I have to leave her life
rlm@2: now before it's too late. But it hurts so badly. It feels like I'm
rlm@2: leaving a piece of myself behind. I will always love her. That's why
rlm@2: I have to fade away. 
rlm@2: 	Fanren-san, thank you again for all of your help. I look forward to
rlm@2: seeing you in Japan someday. Perhaps you can tell me what has become
rlm@2: of Sakura by then. Right now I would love to dance. I'll always
rlm@2: remember it as such a beautiful activity, a song of hearts. Thank you.
rlm@2: 
rlm@2: Sincerely,
rlm@2: Daidouji Tomoyo