rlm@2: This story is a songfic about ChibiUsa a while after Hotaru has died in rlm@2: a battle. The song is ‘Melodies of Life’, a beautiful song from Final rlm@2: Fantasy 9 sung by Emiko Shiratori and written by Nobuo Uematsu. The rlm@2: gorgeous characters were created by the wonderfully talented Naoko rlm@2: Takeuchi. rlm@2: rlm@2: Melodies of Life rlm@2: By Amazoness Quartet rlm@2: amazonessduo@hotmail.com rlm@2: ---------------- rlm@2: rlm@2: ~Alone for a while I've been searching through the dark rlm@2: For traces of the love you left inside my lonely heart rlm@2: To weave by picking up the pieces that remain rlm@2: Melodies of life--love's lost refrain~ rlm@2: rlm@2: Why did you have to leave me? I loved you so much. I still do. rlm@2: That’s why it still hurts so badly whenever I think about you. My mom rlm@2: says I’ve been growing distant, that I’m always lost in thought. That rlm@2: can’t be good for the next Queen of Crystal Tokyo. But I can’t help it, rlm@2: Hotaru. I miss you. When I close my eyes, I can still see that shy rlm@2: smile of yours, hear your soft voice calling me. I’ll always love you, rlm@2: even if we can’t be together. Why wouldn’t you let me come with you? rlm@2: Maybe I could have helped. And even if I couldn’t, at least we would rlm@2: have died together. You told me when you had grown up again that it was rlm@2: to fight alongside me. Why couldn’t I fight alongside you then? I know rlm@2: you wanted to protect me, but it hurts so much without you. It’s so rlm@2: hard to keep going. But every time I falter, every time I fall, I can rlm@2: feel you there with me, helping me make it through. rlm@2: rlm@2: ~Our paths they did cross, though I cannot say just why rlm@2: We met, we laughed, we held on fast, and then we said goodbye rlm@2: And who'll hear the echoes of stories never told? rlm@2: Let them ring out loud till they unfold~ rlm@2: rlm@2: You were always so sad, Hotaru. Just lurking under the surface, rlm@2: like you could never completely escape it. Even when I could lure that rlm@2: smile out of you or hear your laugh, it was still there. I could never rlm@2: completely cure that sadness inside of you. I told you that we’d be rlm@2: together forever and you smiled a little sadly and didn’t say anything. rlm@2: I always wondered why you looked on the dark side of things so often, rlm@2: but I was determined to show you that things could work out. That you rlm@2: could have a happy ending. But now as I look back on it all, was I just rlm@2: naïve? Did you know all along that it would come to this? All the rlm@2: dreams we had shared will never take place now. All the promises I had rlm@2: made of our beautiful future together. I wanted to keep them so dearly, rlm@2: Hotaru. And I’d probably promise you them all over again if you were rlm@2: here, even after all that’s happened. rlm@2: rlm@2: ~In my dearest memories, I see you reaching out to me rlm@2: Though you're gone, I still believe that you can call out my name~ rlm@2: rlm@2: Looking around feverishly, I find myself once again in my bed. rlm@2: Looking next to me, I almost expect to see you there, asleep after a rlm@2: passion filled night, or maybe just reading a book as you watched me rlm@2: dozing. Your beautiful pale body seemed to shine in the moonlight, rlm@2: though I needed no such prompting to go to you. I swear I can hear your rlm@2: voice sometimes, even though Diana says she doesn’t hear anything. rlm@2: Careful not to wake my guardian cat, I sneak outside to the balcony. rlm@2: Its cold out, but I don’t care. Not anymore. I remember when I used to rlm@2: find you out here late at night, staring at the stars. I’d ask you to rlm@2: come back inside but you’d always say you weren’t tired. I would go rlm@2: back in for a few seconds and come back with a blanket for the two of rlm@2: us to share. Sometimes I’d ask what it was and other times you’d look rlm@2: like you didn’t want to talk about it. But it didn’t matter because we rlm@2: were together. Is that what you were trying to teach me whenever I’d rlm@2: feel bad about not being able to fix things for you and you’d tell me rlm@2: that wasn’t what was important? I hug myself tighter as the cold starts rlm@2: to set in. I don’t want to go back inside now. Not yet. rlm@2: rlm@2: ~A voice from the past, joining yours and mine rlm@2: Adding up the layers of harmony rlm@2: And so it goes, on and on rlm@2: Melodies of life, rlm@2: To the sky beyond the flying birds--forever and beyond~ rlm@2: rlm@2: When I look back on things, it seems like a blur sometimes. When rlm@2: we first met, when I saw you smile for the first time, when you rlm@2: returned to me, when we first kissed, when we would share our hopes and rlm@2: dreams in each other’s arms, when I saw you for the last time with that rlm@2: determined look on your face... I’m crying again, I realize. I should rlm@2: hide it before mother sees, but I can’t find the will. She wants me to rlm@2: be strong, to work my way through this, but I’m not as strong as you. rlm@2: You suffered through so much, Hotaru. You took it all and yet you rlm@2: continued on. You would never admit it. You never saw the strength in rlm@2: yourself that I always saw in you. rlm@2: rlm@2: ~So far and away, see the bird as it flies by rlm@2: Gliding through the shadows of the clouds up in the sky rlm@2: I've laid my memories and dreams upon those wings rlm@2: Leave them now and see what tomorrow brings~ rlm@2: rlm@2: Sometime later, I find myself sitting barefoot on the hill where rlm@2: I spent so much time as a child, leaning against an old tree that has rlm@2: grown there. Here I can lose myself in my memories and forget all rlm@2: that’s happened. The birds are beautiful, Hotaru, but not as beautiful rlm@2: as the fireflies. Sometimes I’ll come out late at night and watch them. rlm@2: Sometimes I even think I see you amongst them, carefree and happy at rlm@2: last. It may last for just a split second out of the corner of my eye, rlm@2: but that sight alone gives me the strength I need to push forward. I rlm@2: know I can’t have you back, but sometimes its nice to pretend, ne? I rlm@2: smile a little as I watch the city in the distance. I don’t know what rlm@2: lies ahead of me, but I promise I’ll always remember you, that I’ll rlm@2: always love you. rlm@2: rlm@2: ~In your dearest memories, do you remember loving me? rlm@2: Was it fate that brought us close and now leaves me behind?~ rlm@2: rlm@2: I’ve lost you so many times. I had thought that this time would rlm@2: be no different, that we’d find ourselves in the other’s arms before it rlm@2: was through. But it didn’t work out that way. It was such a cruel trick rlm@2: fate played, letting me fall in love with you before snatching you away rlm@2: from me. But I would do it all over again if I had the choice. It was rlm@2: so painful, but the joy you made me feel was worth so much more. I know rlm@2: we’ll be together again. Because... because I know that you love me, rlm@2: too. rlm@2: rlm@2: ~A voice from the past, joining yours and mine rlm@2: Adding up the layers of harmony rlm@2: And so it goes, on and on rlm@2: Melodies of life, rlm@2: To the sky beyond the flying birds--forever and beyond~ rlm@2: rlm@2: “ChibiUsa-chan..?” rlm@2: I hear a soft voice whisper behind me, ripping me from my rlm@2: thoughts. That voice... My heart starts beating furiously as I sit up rlm@2: on my knees. It’s almost impossible to breath as I struggle to turn rlm@2: around quickly enough. It’s.. you... Standing up, I almost fall back rlm@2: down again. My vision blurs as tears start to form in my eyes. “Hotaru- rlm@2: chan?” I ask weakly as I stumble towards you. You merely smile, dark rlm@2: eyes shining with the inner beauty that made me fall in love with you rlm@2: in the first place. I throw myself into her arms, you stagger back rlm@2: under my assault. Sobs wrack my body as I hold onto you tightly. I’ve rlm@2: missed you so much. There’s been so much I wanted to tell you, but rlm@2: words escape me right now. I want to hold on to you for eternity, to rlm@2: never let go again. I can feel your fingers brushing through my hair rlm@2: and I feel myself sobbing more uncontrollably at the memories. Looking rlm@2: up, I see tears in your own dark eyes. Oh, Hotaru... rlm@2: rlm@2: ~If I should leave this lonely world behind rlm@2: Your voice will still remember our melody rlm@2: Now I know we'll carry on rlm@2: Melodies of life rlm@2: Come circle round and grow deep in our hearts rlm@2: As long as we remember~ rlm@2: rlm@2: I want to hear you promise me that we’ll always be together, that you’ll never leave my side again, rlm@2: but its enough for me just to have you here with me now. I know that this time we don’t need promises like rlm@2: that. Because this time I know that we’ll always be together, even if one of us dies. Because you were with rlm@2: me through every step I took while you were gone. Just as I’d be there with you. But I’m so glad to have rlm@2: you here like this nonetheless. Clutching onto you tighter, I bury my face against your shoulder. rlm@2: Your answer to all of my unasked questions sends a warm spark through my body as your lips rlm@2: press against my own. I feel myself kissing back with all the strength I can muster as the tension from the rlm@2: past few years drains away from me in the space of seconds. I feel alive again in your arms. Truly alive. rlm@2: “How..?” I ask softly. rlm@2: You just smile again and kiss me softly. “I love you, ChibiUsa-chan.” rlm@2: I love you, too, Hotaru. And I always will.