view old/stories/ccs-destiny.txt @ 2:fc00894c1d4a moonlitnights

[svn r3] moved all the bad stuff to 'old'
author rlm
date Fri, 19 Feb 2010 20:53:12 -0500
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1 Author’s note: Hello! ^-^ This is another Tomoyo & Sakura story
2 (like a good deal of my fanfics) and it has some dark issues that it
3 deals with. It isn’t exactly a lemon, but it does have some
4 suggestive moments between two women. I don’t own these characters
5 though I’d do almost anything to own Tomoyo-chan. ^-^ But then I’d
6 have to own Sakura, too, just so she wouldn’t get lonely. ^-^;;
7 Anyway, this fanfic comes from a discussion G.P. and I were having
8 about the possibilities of Sakura’s vast powers after her life
9 started to break down with her marriage to Syaoran and the consequent
10 loss of Tomoyo as a major force in her life. The original idea was
11 much darker, but the characters had their own idea where this story
12 was going. ^-^;; I really hope you enjoy it. ^-^ I always love
13 feedback, so if you have a chance when you’re done with the story, I
14 would love to hear from you. ^-^
17 Don’t Close Your Eyes
18 by Amazoness Duo
19 amazonessduo@hotmail.com
23 What was the start of all this? When had things started taking a
24 turn for the worse? Sakura wasn’t quite sure anymore as she looked
25 back on things. She had a difficult time remembering the last time
26 she was truly happy. The wedding? The honeymoon? Sometime afterwards?
27 The marriage had been dreamlike at first, the novelty of being a
28 married couple making it all the more amazing. It had seemed
29 wonderful. She could finally be with the man she loved always. But
30 things hadn’t worked out quite the way she had planned. She had a
31 hard time connecting with Syaoran. He had a difficult time with his
32 own emotions. Her emotions seemed like a complete mystery to him,
33 like another language. He saw her overemotional behavior often as a
34 sign of weakness and couldn’t understand her pain. Nor could he truly
35 take part in her joy. And so her heart had languished.
36 If that had been the only thing, it might have been bearable. But
37 as time went by, things became worse. Syaoran had always been a
38 jealous person. And now that she was his bride, his possession, he
39 was even worse about it, even to her friends and family. She was
40 confused and hurt with how he treated them. She found that she could
41 not come to him with her misery of being away from them and alone in
42 Hong Kong. The only one she could really talk to about it was Tomoyo,
43 and unfortunately she had heard less and less from the dark haired
44 beauty as time went by until she stopped hearing from her altogether
45 several months before.
46 The phone call from Sonomi had startled her out of a peaceful
47 sleep. At first she thought it was a phone call from Tomoyo but
48 Sonomi’s pain wracked voice quickly shook that thought. She had never
49 heard someone hurt that badly before as Sonomi tried to speak on the
50 phone. A cold chill had run through Sakura’s body as she waited. It
51 had to be about Tomoyo. There was nothing else it could be. And deep
52 in her heart, she already knew what the phone call was about. Tomoyo
53 had killed herself. Sonomi had found her in her little apartment with
54 her wrists slashed. Her broken best friend had bled to death on her
55 floor, all alone in the middle of the night. The simple suicide note
56 left by Tomoyo was just like her, sweet and kind with hidden pain
57 behind it. Apparently, she hadn’t intended for Sakura to ever find
58 out about her suicide, mentioning in the letter how she had faded
59 from Sakura’s life and that now she could leave without worrying
60 about making the brunette sad. Sonomi had other ideas instead of
61 keeping it from Sakura. Sakura had curled up and cried for what felt
62 like an eternity.
63 Tomoyo’s death had shattered Sakura’s heart into thousands of
64 splinters, all lodged painfully in her soul. Syaoran could not mend
65 her heart after that point. She was too far gone, living every day in
66 an emotional agony. She was fairly sure that he didn’t love her
67 anymore. He rarely spent time with her now and the luster of their
68 early marriage was gone. And she had finally come to the realization
69 that she hadn’t loved him in the first place. He was important to
70 her, to be sure, but she had never fallen in love with him. Everyone
71 had pushed her into a relationship with him. And she had gone along
72 with it, believing that they all knew her heart better than she
73 could. And she had been wrong.
74 Pulling up her staff, Sakura closed her emerald green eyes. She
75 didn’t know when things had started going wrong, but she didn’t care
76 by this point. She was the most powerful magician in the world. With
77 all of her magic, fixing things should be easy enough. There was a
78 slight quiver in her heart of fear, but she pushed it away. It was
79 too painful to keep living on this way. Tomoyo, Syaoran, her family,
80 it had all slipped away from her. Clutching the staff tighter, she
81 began to focus all of her magic. “I’m going to put all of this
82 right,” she whispered. As she finished chanting, the world around her
83 began to grow fuzzy, distorted. Colors began to bleed together,
84 reality swirling around her. Faces and images, smells and sounds
85 tormented Sakura as the world around her twisted and pulled. Her own
86 body began following suit, her hand dropping the staff as her fingers
87 began to dissipate in a swirl of light. It felt like she was being
88 pulled apart, piece by piece. A shrill scream shattered the world
89 around her and everything went dark.
91 Some time later, Sakura woke up with a pounding headache. It was
92 still pitch black, but it was now deathly silent. What had happened?
93 Nothing was coming to mind. Everything was distant, like it had all
94 been a dream that was quickly fading away. Perhaps that was all it
95 had been. A horrible nightmare brought on by the stress of Tomoyo’s
96 death and her own weakening relationship with her husband. A sad sigh
97 escaped her lips as she shifted in bed. Good. She was home in bed. It
98 had all been a bad dream after all. She could feel warm arms around
99 her, naked skin against her own as they lay haphazardly under the
100 sheets. She snuggled closer, holding on tightly herself. “Syaoran...”
101 she whispered. She desperately wanted comfort right now, but at least
102 she knew he was there, even if he was asleep. She buried her face
103 against his shoulder and got a face full of long hair. It smelt of
104 lilacs. That was strange. She couldn’t remember that scent before.
105 Nor did she remember Syaoran’s hair being quite so long. Now that she
106 thought about it, the body that was pressed firmly against her didn’t
107 feel much like Syaoran’s either. Her bare leg moved up along the
108 other figure’s long bare leg as Sakura’s confusion grew to a breaking
109 point in her head. The body felt much softer, much more curvy than
110 her husband’s. It also seemed smaller. Her leg finally stopped
111 between the other figure’s legs. This wasn’t her husband at all. This
112 was a woman.
113 Sakura nearly fell out of bed after slipping away from the sleeping
114 figure. What was going on here? How had she woken up naked in bed
115 with another woman? None of this was making any sense. The person in
116 bed should be her husband. If it had all just been a bad dream then
117 she should have woken up to find herself at home in bed with him.
118 Unless... It hadn’t been a nightmare at all, had it? Then her magic
119 must have gone freakishly wrong to have her end up here. Noticing a
120 discarded nightie on the floor, Sakura snagged it and quickly pulled
121 it over her head. She dimly realized that it fit perfectly, as it if
122 were her own even though she had never seen the garment before.
123 Standing up silently in the dark room, Sakura waited for her eyes
124 to adjust. The room she was in definitely wasn’t the one she shared
125 with her husband. It looked elegantly decorated and beautifully done.
126 Whoever had made up the room had done so with great care. There were
127 long ethereal curtains around the bed that Sakura had slipped out of,
128 obscuring the woman within. She was lying on her back, her long dark
129 hair spread around her head on the pillow she was using. The sheet
130 had been pulled mostly off of her from Sakura’s quick escape from the
131 bed. She was obviously a very beautiful woman around Sakura’s age.
132 But that still didn’t explain why they were sharing a bed. Especially
133 in such an intimate way. Sakura’s cheeks flushed crimson as she
134 covered herself with her arms self-consciously. What had her magic
135 done?
136 The woman on the bed stirred in her sleep, startling Sakura nearly
137 to death before going back to her contented slumber. The Cardmistress
138 let out a weary sigh of relief. Her curiosity began gnawing at her
139 again. She had to know who the woman was and what was going on.
140 Leaning forward, her fingers grasped onto the thin fabric of the bed
141 curtains. Pulling them aside, Sakura squinted in the darkness, trying
142 to make out the familiar face of the sleeping woman. Realization hit
143 her with a sudden ferocity. “Tomoyo-chan!” she exclaimed in shock.
144 The last she had seen of her was at the funeral. Her knees went weak
145 at the sight, the body of her best friend stirring again after her
146 sudden outburst. How could it be? Tomoyo was dead. She had seen her.
147 There was no way... But she had used her magic to fix things. Had she
148 saved Tomoyo?
149 Yawning tiredly, the dark haired woman in question blinked up at
150 the brunette who was leaning over her. A sleepy smile crossed her
151 lips as she propped herself up on one elbow. She seemed unabashed
152 about her nudity in front of Sakura. “Sakura’s up early. Did Bara-
153 chan wake you up again? I still don’t know which of us she likes to
154 wake up more often.”
155 Sakura could do nothing but stare at the dark haired woman in front
156 of her. This was all too much too quickly for her to understand.
157 Tomoyo was back. And she was here for some reason. Or Sakura was
158 there. One or the other. Had she called her Sakura and not Sakura-
159 chan? She’d never heard that before. She barely heard what Tomoyo
160 said. She only nodded weakly. Tomoyo’s hand reached out, stroking
161 Sakura’s cheek lovingly. Sakura felt a dark blush creeping up on her
162 cheeks as Tomoyo leaned up and kissed her. It was long and sweet, the
163 pale woman taking her time to savor the kiss. It was very slow yet
164 passionate, beginning to send a warm feeling through Sakura’s whole
165 body. Wide eyed, she slumped back to her knees when the kiss finally
166 finished, now even more confused than ever at what had happened.
167 A giggle came from Tomoyo as she watched the bewildered woman on
168 the floor near her. Sakura was always so cute, even when she was
169 tired. “You should get back to sleep, Sakura. We have a big day
170 tomorrow. If Bara-chan comes back in, I’ll take care of her,
171 darling.” Taking Sakura by the hand gently, she pulled her back onto
172 the bed next to her, snuggling close once more. She rested her head
173 on Sakura’s chest, her long dark hair spilling across Sakura like a
174 blanket.
175 Sitting in shock, Sakura could do nothing but stare at the girl
176 lying against her. Just what had she done with her magic? Things had
177 changed quite a bit. And why had Tomoyo kissed her? Just what was
178 going on? Sakura blushed deeply in the darkness, trying to sort past
179 the knotted feelings inside of her. Tomoyo was back. That was the
180 important thing. This time around she hadn’t killed herself. She was
181 alive. And happy. Sakura wrapped her arms around Tomoyo protectively,
182 prompting Tomoyo to snuggle closer. Sakura yawned, closing her eyes.
183 After all of the stress and sudden shock, she passed out quickly.
185 “Mama?” a tiny voice meandered through Sakura’s head. It sounded
186 distant, miles away. But it slowly became closer, more insistent. She
187 felt a tug on her nightgown from small hands. “Mama?”
188 Blinking tiredly, Sakura sat up in bed. Closing her jade eyes, she
189 stretched, yawning. Last night sure had been... “Mama?” a small voice
190 interrupted her thoughts, irrefutably nearby. Sakura’s eyes shot open
191 suddenly. It hadn’t been a dream. Again. She was really here. With
192 Tomoyo. And... “Bara-chan?” she asked curiously. The little girl
193 smiled, happy to have her attention. Just who was the young lady? Was
194 she Sakura’s daughter? Or Tomoyo’s? She and Syaoran had discussed
195 children on occasion, but it had never happened. Was this Tomoyo’s
196 daughter then? She had Tomoyo’s stormy blue eyes with dark brown hair
197 down to her shoulders. “Mama, can you put these ribbons in my hair?”
198 she asked sweetly, holding out a handful of green ribbons to Sakura.
199 Sakura just stared at her for a minute, slowly taking the ribbons.
200 Who’s daughter was she, then? This whole thing wasn’t making any
201 sense. She decided to be more careful the next time she decided to
202 use her magic to fix everything.
203 A gentle giggle came from the other side of the room, drawing
204 Sakura’s attention. Tomoyo was already dressed in a business outfit,
205 her hair done up beautifully in braids. “You’re finally awake,
206 Sakura. You must have been tired last night. I would have woken you
207 up earlier, but I couldn’t bring myself to. You look so pretty when
208 you sleep.” Looking back in the mirror as she finished adjusting her
209 outfit, Tomoyo sighed dreamily.
210 Sakura just sat in bed, clutching the sheets against her body. Her
211 emerald eyes darted from the girl in front of her to Tomoyo and back.
212 The little girl was still watching her patiently, her little hand
213 holding the ribbons out to the dazed woman. Sakura found herself
214 slowly reaching out for them, not quite aware of what she was doing.
215 This pleased the younger girl who eagerly gave up the little fabric
216 strips. The ribbons hung heavily in Sakura’s hand, practically
217 demanding her full attentions. They were so much safer than
218 contemplating what was going on. Beautiful lavender ribbons. They
219 brought back memories of braiding Tomoyo’s hair, her fingers lost in
220 Tomoyo’s lavender tresses. She didn’t notice the curious look that
221 Bara was giving her, nostalgia replacing her confusion for the time
222 being. The last she had seen of Tomoyo was at the funeral. It had
223 been the single most painful event in her life. Nothing could have
224 possibly prepared her for it. She still woke up crying at night, but
225 there was no comfort in waking up. The nightmare had been very real.
226 But this time, it was only a nightmare. Tomoyo was alive and well.
227 She had the same bright, gorgeous smile that Sakura remembered her
228 wearing so beautifully. She felt like she had finally been let out of
229 a sealed coffin. Poisonous thoughts that had plagued her nearly every
230 day since the dark haired woman’s suicide had left her feelings so
231 tired and weak, always on the verge of collapse. But now she couldn’t
232 even remember all of them, as if they had been nothing more than a
233 dream. And for all intents and purposes, they were. She was the only
234 one who could remember what had happened before she had fixed things.
235 She still wasn’t sure exactly what she had fixed, but she was content
236 in the knowledge that Tomoyo was still alive and well. She had needed
237 her best friend terribly over the past few months and going on
238 without her had been almost impossible. No, that wasn’t true. She had
239 needed Tomoyo for much longer than the past few months. The past few
240 years of her marriage. No, that wasn’t right either. She had needed
241 her ever since she left for Hong Kong. Ever since she left Tomoyo.
242 Tilting Sakura’s chin, Tomoyo gave her a petal soft kiss, savoring
243 the wondrous feel of Sakura’s lips against her own. Even after all
244 the years they had been together, she never got tired of the simple
245 joys of living with the brunette. Her lips lingered on Sakura’s for a
246 long moment, the warmth in her heart wrapping around her like a
247 blanket. Her lithe fingers delicately stroked the bottom of Sakura’s
248 chin as she finally pulled away, smiling happily as she did. “I’m
249 going to check on breakfast. Don’t take too long, you two.”
250 Sakura watched Tomoyo’s retreating form with wide eyes, her fingers
251 lightly held against her lips. She was more awake now and the shock
252 had had time to set in so she couldn’t just push it aside the way she
253 had the night before. No, that wasn’t entirely the case. She was
254 still most definitely shocked. But the idea of pushing this off was
255 impossible. She was dense, but she wasn’t blind.
256 “Mama?” Bara’s voice reached out again, taking a hold of Sakura’s
257 thoughts and leading her back to the ribbons in her hand.
258 “Oh... Hai, let me fix these for you,” Sakura said after a moment’s
259 hesitation. Her voice came out surprisingly better than she would
260 have thought, given the circumstances. While her fingers were busy
261 with the ribbons in the little girl’s hair, her mind was still
262 focussed a minute earlier on the kiss. It had felt so natural, so
263 warm and loving. It was with some shock that she realized exactly
264 what it was. The kiss of a couple that has had quite some time to
265 grow completely comfortable with the other. Granted, Tomoyo kissed
266 rather differently from Syaoran, more gentle and slow, but the basis
267 was still there. The years were apparent in the kiss. Her shaking
268 hands settled in her lap. Her eyes slowly began to scan the room. In
269 the morning light it was much easier to see the room’s design. The
270 room was very neat, everything seeming to accentuate everything else
271 like a well designed costume. It was definitely Tomoyo’s doing. But
272 at the same time, there were tell tale signs that she shared the
273 room. Little stuffed animals at odd places, trinkets on the dresser,
274 cluttered yet organized chaos lurking around the room. And most
275 importantly, a picture of the two of them by the bedside, both in
276 wedding gowns, along with numerous other pictures of the happy
277 couple. Bara showed up in quite a few of them as well. Apparently
278 Tomoyo still did an excellent job of documenting everything for
279 posterity. And why wouldn’t she? If they were married then she had
280 even more reason to be making her memorial videos and documenting
281 Sakura’s life. Her loving and devoted wife. “Hoe...” Sakura slumped
282 back on the bed, by now too lost in thought to notice the little girl
283 mentioning that breakfast is probably ready or that she had already
284 walked out the bedroom door. Just what had she changed? She was
285 fairly certain that it was one specific thing, but how could it have
286 had such drastic affects?
287 “Sakura?” Tomoyo asked softly, startling Sakura from her thoughts.
288 The pale woman was standing at their bedside. She had been watching
289 the brunette for a minute or two now, but Sakura hadn’t noticed her
290 arrival. Sakura was like a book to Tomoyo. Her favorite book, of
291 course. Her feelings always came across perfectly, even when Sakura
292 didn’t quite understand them. The years they had spent together had
293 only made it easier to tell what Sakura was feeling. She could tell
294 that Sakura was having trouble with something but she wasn’t sure if
295 she should say anything yet. Sometimes offering a subtle hand made
296 much more of a difference than a strong grasp. She was there for
297 Sakura and her wife knew that. If Sakura didn’t want to say anything,
298 then that was all right. Though it usually didn’t take long before
299 Sakura told her whatever was on her mind. Sitting down next to the
300 Cardmistress, Tomoyo placed her hand atop her wife’s, squeezing
301 gently. “Are you all right?”
302 Sakura couldn’t answer for a moment. All she could do was look at
303 the dark haired woman, listening to her gentle voice, transfixed by
304 her stormy blue eyes. Her free hand came up slowly of it’s own
305 volition, the tips of her fingers tracing Tomoyo’s silken skin. Her
306 fingers brushed through Tomoyo’s soft hair as they continued up along
307 her cheek. Sakura’s heart had nearly stopped in her chest. “Tomoyo-
308 chan!!” Sakura threw her arms around Tomoyo, holding onto her as
309 tightly as she could, her body shaking as she buried her head in the
310 crook of the dark haired woman’s neck. The reality of the situation
311 hadn’t quite dawned on her until that moment. Until then, she had
312 still been confused, lost in the situation presented before her. But
313 now the how and what hardly mattered to her. Now that she was
314 surrounded in Tomoyo’s presence, her soft, gentle touch, her warm
315 skin, her intoxicating scent, it was all that mattered. “You’re
316 really here... Oh, Tomoyo-chan!” Tears that Sakura thought she could
317 no longer shed spilt down her cheeks, sliding down Tomoyo’s shoulder.
318 Coherent thought was beyond her. There was merely a sea of emotions
319 and she was Alice, riding through it all in a tiny jar, tossing and
320 turning in the waves. She could feel Tomoyo’s hand lightly rubbing
321 her back, the pale woman’s soft voice whispering reassurances in her
322 ear. She cried even harder, clutching onto Tomoyo with all of her
323 strength. “I won’t let you go again, Tomoyo-chan... I won’t...” she
324 sobbed weakly.
325 “I wouldn’t dream of going anywhere without you, Sakura,” Tomoyo
326 whispered comfortingly. She gently brushed Sakura’s hair from her
327 damp eyes with her free hand, still stroking Sakura’s back with the
328 other. What had started as a small concern in her mind had suddenly
329 turned into a blaring alarm. Something was definitely wrong. A
330 nightmare, perhaps? No, Sakura usually woke her up when she had
331 nightmares, wanting her to tell her it would be all right. Whatever
332 this was, it was affecting Sakura immensely. The brunette was acting
333 as if she had died. The possibility of magic was open, but aside from
334 the magician’s library she had insisted on adding to the house for
335 Sakura and the occasions that Sakura would use magic when it was just
336 the two of them, the Cardmistress hadn’t had to deal with any real
337 magical crisis for years. But now wasn’t the time to pursue it. Right
338 now she just wanted to take away Sakura’s pain. The cause could wait
339 until later. Pulling away ever so slightly, Tomoyo leaned down and
340 began to kiss away Sakura’s salty tears one at a time, her hands
341 resting on the brunette’s shoulders. Sakura could only look back at
342 her with watery jade eyes that tugged at Tomoyo’s heart. ‘Oh, Sakura-
343 chan... I’m so sorry. You should never have to look out at the world
344 with such sad eyes. I’ll do anything to make that pain go away.’
345 Sakura sniffled as Tomoyo kept kissing away the last of her tears.
346 Her body still shook though she had finally quit crying. She watched
347 Tomoyo the entire time, her eyes following the sweet motions and the
348 concerned yet reassuring look on the dark haired woman’s face.
349 Tomoyo’s soft lips remained on her skin for a few seconds at a time,
350 lingering on each little tear drop before miraculously whisking it
351 away and moving to the next. Each kiss soothed Sakura’s weary mind,
352 like bandages for her soul. It was nice. Warm. Loving. The tumultuous
353 sea of emotion that had risen up around her like a tsunami slowly
354 began to calm into a peaceful, serene ocean with Tomoyo at it’s
355 center. She had reached out for her, pulling her away from the
356 shipwreck she had found herself lost in. Just like Tomoyo always had.
357 Her kisses continued across Sakura’s warm cheeks, trailing the last
358 of her tears. Sakura moved her head to the side, her eyes finally
359 closing. Her lips met Tomoyo’s, Sakura’s last tear dripping past her
360 chin, forgotten. Sakura felt her whole body still as she kissed her
361 best friend. She didn’t know quite why. Tomoyo’s kisses had been
362 coursing through her bit by bit. She wanted to feel them... Needed to
363 feel them, to know that they were there. That Tomoyo was alive and
364 well. In her arms. She kissed Tomoyo softly at first, but found
365 herself eagerly complying as Tomoyo began to kiss her more
366 passionately. She couldn’t remember what was the dream anymore. She
367 only knew this moment. There was so much she wanted to tell Tomoyo
368 but had never had the chance to. And now that she was, Sakura found
369 herself in tears even thinking about all the things she wanted to
370 say. But this felt like the perfect way to get across all of the
371 nuances in her heart. Finding out that they were married had come as
372 a huge shock to Sakura. It had never crossed her mind before that
373 such a thing would have ever been possible. But now it didn’t seem to
374 matter. Her lips parted slightly and for a brief moment she felt
375 Tomoyo’s tongue dancing with her own. The rest of the ice in her
376 heart melted. It was delightfully sensuous, insanely slow. The dark
377 haired girl kept drawing out the moment, kissing Sakura with a gentle
378 intensity that shook off the painful bonds that had shackled Sakura’s
379 heart.
380 Relaxing into the kiss, Tomoyo allowed herself to stop worrying
381 herself to death for the time being. Yes, this was certainly her
382 beloved Sakura. Whatever the problem was, she would help the brunette
383 with it if it reared up again. For now, she wanted to bathe her in
384 the love that filled her heart near bursting. Sakura’s kiss had been
385 hesitant at first, unsure of herself. But it had quickly grown to the
386 wonderful breathless kisses that had marked some of their most
387 treasured moments together. Sakura’s arms slowly wrapped around her
388 neck as they continued kissing. Tomoyo leaned into Sakura, enjoying
389 the warm feeling of their bodies pressed together. For the dark
390 haired woman, kissing Sakura, or just being with Sakura for that
391 matter, was like being out in a shower of Sakura petals, each one a
392 piece of her beloved’s heart raining down about her. It was the
393 purest joy, the deepest happiness. And it only fed her limitless love
394 for the woman in her arms. “I love you,” Tomoyo whispered. “With all
395 my heart.”
396 “I love you, too, Tomoyo-cha... Tomoyo.” Sakura smiled softly. It
397 was a small, genuine smile. Yes, that other place, that dark place
398 must have been a dream. A nightmare. It was all fading as quickly as
399 one. How could she have gotten so worked up over a bad dream like
400 that? Tomoyo was alive. Tomoyo was hers. They had a beautiful
401 daughter and a wonderful life together. There was no reason to
402 indulge in nightmares any longer. “I love you, too.”