The story contains some sexual scenes so don't read it if you're 

 underage. Right, like if you'd listen to me, but don't come to me 

 when your psychiatrist tells you you're not quite normal!

  The story takes place after the senshi defeat Neherenia. So Hotaru 

 reached her normal age again and lives with the Outers and ChibiUsa 

 with Usagi and her family. Hotaru is about 14 and ChibiUsa a bit 

 younger.

  Before we begin I would like to thank Naoko Takeuchi for creating 

 the beautiful legend of Sailor Moon.

  These characters ain't mine, I'm just borrowing them for a while.

 

  This story is a continuation of the story "Hotaru's pain", but it 

 makes sense on it's own too (but it makes more sense if you read 

 Hotaru's pain first).

 

   Hotaru's pain part 2

    Featuring Hotaru and ChibiUsa

     By The Ghost of 'lectricity

 

 

  Hotaru ate her lunch in silence as her classmates laughed and had 

 fun around her. It seemed like nothing had changed from yesterday. 

 Her classmates were still ignoring the silent and a bit weird 

 black-haired girl in the back row.

  What was wrong? Everybody had seen how she healed the boy 

 yesterday, everyone had stood in the circle around them as she put 

 her hand on the boy's head and made the blood disappear.

  They weren't calling her a witch. Well, at least not more than 

 once. But still she didn't know what they were thinking about her. 

 She knew they were talking about her, but she did not know what 

 they were saying. She saw a pair of eyes turning her way but as 

 soon as her eyes wandered across the room to meet them the pair 

 quickly turned away.

  <Okay, let's see now... Mio thinks I'm a... a witch > It was still 

 hard for Hotaru to say the word, even in her mind. <She stated that 

 pretty clearly. How about the others? Mio's been walking around the 

 class talking to everybody all day. Why does she want to make 

 everyone hate me?. Why is she so mean to me? ...just because I'm 

 better in history?... What about Ryu?. 'Twas almost funny how he 

 thanked me in the morning... so respectful and official... but he 

 said he'd have lunch with me > At these thoughts Hotaru blushed.

 <He's not even in the room now... he was talking to Mio a while 

 ago... maybe she persuaded him not to eat with me... maybe he just 

 forgot... >

  Hotaru was watching Mio wander around the class, as the blue 

 haired girl was making sure she wouldn't let anyone out. Hotaru was 

 feeling like she was trapped inside a circle. Inside a circle of 

 people, turning their backs to her. Suddenly a shadow fell over 

 her...

  "Hi!"

  "R- Ryu..."

  "May I sit down? Why are you so amazed? I said I'd have lunch with 

 you."

  "I... I thought you forgot..." Hotaru replied silently.

  "How could I forget? You saved my life."

  Hotaru remained silent and was looking down.

  "What?! Aren't you proud of what you done?" Ryu asked surprised.

  "I... I don't know. Now everybody thinks I'm a witch." Hotaru 

 said, looking at Mio now, who was still running around the 

 class.

  "You think she's telling that to everyone?" Ryu asked, slightly 

 grinning.

  "What else..."

  "Well, actually... I talked to her earlier. I told her not to call 

 you that - what she called you yesterday... Now she's telling 

 everyone that I'm in love with you! HaHaHa!"

  As Ryu was laughing loudly Hotaru just blushed. The fact that 

 anyone - other than ChibiUsa - would like her *that* much seemed 

 totally absurd to her. Obviously Ryu was thinking pretty much the 

 same about it.

  "See Mio, I'm talking to Tomoe Hotaru and I'm not dead yet!" Ryu 

 shouted across the classroom.

  "Well then why don't you two find a quiet place where you can do 

 what you *really* want to do!" the blue-haired girl shouted back.

  "Are you getting jealous?" Ryu teased her. The whole class knew 

 Ryu and Mio had a crush on each other since they first laid eyes on 

 each other. As the two and the rest of the class were enjoying 

 their quarrel Hotaru went through hell. She never liked to be in 

 the center of attention. Ryu and Mio made her a part of the show 

 they were putting up.

  "Jealous of her? No, the poor scared girl wouldn't dare to do 

 anything."

  "So, what's the problem then?"

  "You! If you're so nice to her she'll think you like her!"

  Then someone cut in: "Yeah, and we all know whom he *really* 

 likes!" The two just blushed, which doesn't happen often and 

 simultaneously shouted back to the other boy: "Shut up!"

 

 ***

 

  "I'll get it!" Hotaru chimed cheerfully as the doorbell rang. 

 Just before she opened the door she looked at Haruka and Michiru, 

 who were sitting on the couch.

  "Can't you two ever stop? Haruka-papa, take your hand out of 

 Michiru-mama's blouse!" As Hotaru turned to open the door she said 

 over her shoulder: "And from under her skirt too!"

 

 

  It was an unusual view: this time it seemed like Hotaru was the 

 more cheerful one and ChibiUsa had a somewhat sad look in her eyes. 

 But she didn't want Hotaru to notice.

  "So, how was it in school?" ChibiUsa asked Hotaru as they entered 

 her room, trying to disband the heavy thoughts that lingered in her 

 mind.

  "I think I met new friends." Hotaru said with a big smile on her 

 face.

  "You think?"

  "Well, I don't have that much experience in making friends, 

 ChibiUsa-chan."

  "That's great then." ChibiUsa said.

  "What is with you ChibiUsa-chan? You're strange." Hotaru inquired 

 concerned.

  ChibiUsa looked her best friend square in the eyes.

  "I got a letter today.... It was from my mother... from the 

 future..." ChibiUsa saw something break in her best friend's eyes.

  "Oh, ChibiUsa-chan..."

  "I'll have to go home soon..."

  To Hotaru it seemed like the world stopped turning and this moment 

 of pain would last for an eternity.

 

 

  "Haruka-papa? Michiru-mama? Can I come in?" Hotaru asked as she 

 knocked on the door of the pair's bedroom.

  "Of course, come in."

  "What is it, angel? Why aren't you asleep yet?" Michiru asked the 

 figure who sat down on their bed in the darkness.

  Not answering the question Hotaru asked immediately: "How do you 

 know you love somebody?" 

  "Uhm... Errr... I... I... Haruka, would you like to answer that?"

  "Me? Hmmm... Errr... When you like to be around that someone. 

 Michiru, would you care to continue?" Haruka picked up the game 

 Michiru began.

  "When you like to hug someone!" Michiru said as she hugged Haruka.

  "When you like to kiss someone!" Haruka kissed Michiru.

  "When someone is more than just a friend to you."

  As Haruka and Michiru began kissing passionately Hotaru figured 

 they wouldn't be of any more use to her.

  <More than just a friend...>

 

  Hotaru was walking down the hall toward her own room when she 

 bumped into Setsuna.

  "Oh, sorry Setsuna-mama." Hotaru apologised.

  "Hotaru-chan, wait. I have to talk to you." Setsuna said as put 

 her hand on Hotaru's shoulder to stop her.

  "Why, what is it?" Hotaru replied.

  "...let's sit down."

  "Here? On the floor?" Hotaru asked but Setsuna already began 

 speaking.

  "In a few years ChibiUsa will be born." Setsuna took a long 

 breath. "You know she didn't know you when she came to our time, 

 right?" Setsuna knew she was about to break the girl's heart. "I 

 know it's hard but... you will have to..."

  "No, no, no! You can't demand that!" Hotaru screamed with tears 

 building up in her eyes as she ran toward her room.

  Setsuna let out a sigh in the dark corridor. She was sure she 

 wouldn't get any sleep tonight, just like the last six weeks. There 

 must be another way. And so another sleepless night would go by.

 

  Hotaru was again crying herself to sleep this night. In a few days 

 ChibiUsa would go away and she would lose the sun that made her 

 dark world brighter. The fact that maybe she would't even be 

 allowed to see her friend for the next one thousand years only made 

 her tears flow faster down her cheeks. Without ChibiUsa her own 

 life seemed meaningless to her. What was she really feeling for 

 ChibiUsa? Was she just a friend... or was she... more...? Her 

 feelings for the small pink bunny were much stronger than for any 

 other of her friends. Even stronger than for Haruka-papa, Michiru-

 mama and Setsuna-mama. Is it... love? But she's a girl! In school 

 they say girls should love boys! But Haruka-papa and Michiru-mama 

 love each other, and they are girls...

  "Oh, ChibiUsa-chan..." a whisper echoed silently in the dark room.

  Why does it hurt so much...? Love...

 

 

  It was an ordinary Saturday morning the next day at the Outers' 

 mansion. Michiru was making breakfast, Haruka was reading her 

 sports magazine and glancing every now and then over to Michiru. 

 Michiru would then bend over, on purpose of course, so Haruka could 

 admire her long legs and firm butt. Setsuna was rambling something 

 about the "damn primitive clocks" like she always did when she was 

 waken by the alarm clock. Hotaru was silently eating her breakfast, 

 just like always, but the three young women knew Hotaru was 

 restless inside.

  Haruka stood up, wanting to comfort Hotaru. She always felt so 

 guilty for trying to kill the fragile little girl so many times. 

 She had a very feminine and motherly side - the side only Hotaru 

 and Michiru knew. Just as she wanted to say something to Hotaru - 

 what, she did not know yet - the telephone rang. Saved by the bell, 

 Haruka picked up her saviour.

  "Hello?... Hi Usagi-chan... Yes, she's here... Wait a minute. 

 Hotaru-chan! It's for you. It's Usagi. ... Take the phone in the 

 living room, we don't want to disturb you."

 

  Hotaru sat down on the couch and picked up the phone.

  "Hello?"

  "Hello Hotaru-chan, it's me, Usagi."

  "Hello."

  "So you heard the news..."

  "Yes..."

  "I need to know something Hotaru-chan. What do you feel for 

 ChibiUsa-chan?"

  Hotaru was hit in her weak spot.

  "I... She's my best friend."

  "Do you... ... Do you love her?"

  "I... I... I don't know. ...yes..." The last word was just a 

 whisper, as if Hotaru didn't want Usagi to hear it. Or maybe she 

 didn't want herself to hear it, knowing it would only bring her a 

 lot of pain once it's said.

  "You have to tell her that!"

  "No! I can't! She... I... She won't understand."

  "Hotaru-chan... You know she will. She a smart girl." Hotaru could 

 hear the shaking in Usagi's voice. Usagi would miss ChibiUsa just 

 as much as Hotaru will.

  "But she'll be gone in a few days anyway. It doesn't matter 

 anymore..." A tear - a silent witness of Hotaru's pain - ran down 

 her cheek.

  "You're wrong, it does matter! If you don't tell her, you'll never 

 know what she feels."

  "But- , but-" She couldn't say anything beyond that. Her sobs 

 choked away the fake excuses.

  "I'll- I'll send her over, okay?" Even Usagi started to sob now.

  "O- o-kay."

  "Hotaru-chan, I'm gonna put down the phone now, OK?"

  "Usagi-chan, tell me... that it's gonna be alright..."

  "Everything is gonna be okay... I promise..."

  "Thank you..."

 

  Except for Hotaru the house was empty when ChibiUsa came over. 

 Haruka, Michiru and Setsuna said they had some business to attend 

 to. Although they had the house for themselves Hotaru led ChibiUsa 

 to her room. Hotaru needed the shelter of her room to say what she 

 intended to. For the last hour she was grinding the words in her 

 mind but she still had no clue of what to say. She sat down on her 

 bed and ChibiUsa sat down beside her. They were sitting in silence 

 and tension for a minute, Hotaru was still thinking of what to say. 

 Suddenly ChibiUsa hugged Hotaru around her waist.

  "Oh, Hotaru-chan..." Within ChibiUsa's embrace Hotaru's mind 

 finally found the peace it was longing for. ChibiUsa put her head 

 on Hotaru's chest and closed her eyes and Hotaru put her arms 

 around ChibiUsa's back and closed her eyes also. After a while 

 ChibiUsa began:

  "You know why I like to hug you?"

  "You... You like to hug me?" Hotaru said in amazement, thinking of 

 what Haruka-papa and Michiru-mama told her yesterday night.

  "I like to hug you because you're not as tall as the other girls."

  "What?"

  "You know, if I hug them my head reaches only their tummy. And 

 except for Usagi, all of them have really strong muscles there - 

 they are not soft. If you look up from there you only see two big 

 balloons hanging over your head. I get really scared if I hug Mako-

 chan." Then she paused for a moment. She remained serious when she 

 continued to speak: "But if I hug you my head lands straight on two 

 soft pillows - with two chocolates on it, just like in a hotel 

 room. Sometimes the chocolates are soft and I want to eat them, but 

 sometimes they are really hard and I want to hold them in my hands 

 so they would get softer. And if I look up from here I can see your 

 beautiful face and your beautiful eyes looking down at me." Their 

 eyes met but Hotaru turned her head away.

  "ChibiUsa-chan, I have to tell you something..." Hotaru took a 

 deep breath. "ChibiUsa, you have been my first true friend. You 

 made me laugh when no one was there to care for me. You were the 

 light that made me hang on to my life when I was almost dead. You 

 mean everything to me... I... I love you ChibiUsa..." Hotaru's eyes 

 were closed as she whispered the last words. Her head wasn't facing 

 ChibiUsa. Moments seemed like hours, seconds like eternity. Then, 

 she heard a soft whisper.

  "I love you too, Hotaru." Hotaru felt a pair of soft lips press 

 against her skin, sending shivers down her body.

  "...oh, ChibiUsa..." ChibiUsa was kissing Hotaru all over her face 

 - on her cheeks, on her nose, on her forehead - until finally 

 Hotaru felt the soft lips touch her own. Hotaru opened her mouth 

 lightly and her tongue carefully touched ChibiUsa's lips and tasted 

 their sweetness.

  ChibiUsa pushed Hotaru's body softly so Hotaru fell backwards on 

 her bed and ChibiUsa right on top of her. "...oh, ChibiUsa... I 

 dreamed of this..." ChibiUsa was sitting on top of Hotaru, her 

 hands placed on Hotaru's belly. Hotaru felt the two hands move 

 upward, slowly reaching her ribs and the base of her breasts, 

 stopping there. Hotaru opened her eyes and found ChibiUsa's 

 questioning face.

  "Go on... please..." Hotaru whispered. She felt the two soft hands 

 finally reaching the end of their journey as they softly squeezed 

 the tender flesh of her breasts through the fabric of Hotaru's 

 shirt. Hotaru sighed when ChibiUsa began kneading her breasts. 

 ChibiUsa saw Hotaru's nipples push against the fabric and she took 

 one between her fingers. Hotaru felt the little fingers squeezing 

 her nipple and sighed once more, the sensations driving her crazy. 

 She couldn't bear it any more. She reached to her waist and pulled 

 off her shirt, revealing her aroused breasts.

  "... my chocolates..." Before Hotaru could realize what ChibiUsa 

 was doing she felt something warm encompass her nipple. ChibiUsa 

 was kissing it! Hotaru never felt this kind of pleasure before. The 

 warmth of ChibiUsa's mouth, ChibiUsa's tongue flicking over the 

 nipple. Hotaru was panting heavily.

  Hotaru was on the brink of the greatest orgasm she ever had. Her 

 hand travelled down her belly toward ChibiUsa's pussy that was 

 placed on Hotaru's lap. ChibiUsa jerked when she felt something on 

 her pussy, but Hotaru squeezed her hand gently past ChibiUsa and 

 cupped her own sex. As her fingers were teasing and pleasuring her 

 own pussy through the skin-tight pants she felt the warmth of 

 ChibiUsa's sex against her wrist. ChibiUsa was licking and sucking 

 on Hotaru's nipples and rubbing her crotch against Hotaru's wrist. 

 Then Hotaru's body froze up and in the same moment her scream of 

 pleasure filled the air of the room.

 

    ***

 

  Eleven young people gathered in the park a few days later. But the 

 group was not a happy one, the heavy thought of farewell hung in 

 the air. It was a sad ceremony - ChibiUsa was saying goodbye to all 

 her friends. Usagi was trying very hard not to cry by holding on to 

 Mamoru as hard as she could. Their goodbye present was a box of all 

 the photos of her they had. Amy bought her a book. Makoto baked 

 cookies for her. Rei gave her a special lucky charm. Minako 

 presented her with a big poster of Sailor V. 

  The only one left to say goodbye to was Hotaru. She hugged 

 ChibiUsa gently and they kissed. They didn't bother about what the 

 others would think and they whispered into each others ears a soft 

 but definite "I love you."

  "ChibiUsa, my present is a poem. I've written it for you." Hotaru 

 promised herself not to cry, not to make it even harder for 

 ChibUsa. But as soon as she saw ChibiUsa's eyes fill up with tears 

 when she gave her the envelope, she knew she wouldn't be strong 

 enough.

  "You've written a poem for me? No one ever wrote a poem for me..."

  "But don't read it now. After you get home..."

  "I have something for you too, Hotaru." ChibiUsa said, reaching 

 into her pocket and giving the dark beauty a picture. It was a 

 picture of ChibiUsa and Hotaru holding hands, smiling brightly into 

 the camera. It had a precious carved frame and in the corner of the 

 picture were the words "I love you, Hotaru" written.

  They hugged again and let the tears of their loss flow in silence.

 

 	***

 

 I'm lonely when I close my eyes.

 

 Say, Haruka-papa, Michiru-mama, Setsuna-mama? Hold my hand tonight. 

 Stay with me all night long. I want to have happy dreams. Dreams 

 the color of rainbows. Dreams where the people precious to me are 

 smiling with joy. 

 

 Dreams that won't disappear when I open my eyes.

 

 

 End of Part 2

 

 The Ghost of 'lectricity

 Peter.dobaj@guest.arnes.si

 

 The last few lines are from the poem Dreams.