1.1 --- /dev/null	Thu Jan 01 00:00:00 1970 +0000
     1.2 +++ b/old/stories/farewellfin.txt	Fri Feb 19 20:53:12 2010 -0500
     1.3 @@ -0,0 +1,538 @@
     1.4 +We’d like to thank Boco the Chokobo, because without his help, this story
     1.5 +would never have been finished, especially not in time for ChibiUsa’s
     1.6 +birthday. ^-^
     1.7 +
     1.8 +Farewell
     1.9 +By the Amazoness Quartet
    1.10 +
    1.11 +
    1.12 +ChibiUsa sighed anxiously. It was a beautiful day outside, but that
    1.13 +was far from her mind. A certain dark haired girl was the focus of it, but
    1.14 +that wasn't anything new. She was waiting for Hotaru to finish getting
    1.15 +dressed so they could leave for Hotaru's father's beach house where they'd
    1.16 +spend the next few days together. Alone this time. ChibiUsa couldn't help
    1.17 +but smile at the idea of being alone with Hotaru. She'd already had a
    1.18 +birthday party earlier today with the others and now she'd be able to enjoy
    1.19 +the rest of it with the one person she wished to share everything with.
    1.20 +
    1.21 +A wailing noise snapped her out of her thoughts. It took her a
    1.22 +moment to realize it was the sound of a child crying. Knowing that both of
    1.23 +their twin daughters that had come back from the future were somewhere
    1.24 +in the house, it had to be something wrong for one of them. Heading down
    1.25 +the stairs quickly, she tried to pinpoint where the sobbing was coming from.
    1.26 +Selene looked up teary eyed at ChibiUsa. The future princess kneeled down
    1.27 +worriedly next to the younger girl. “Selene, what’s wrong? Are you okay?”
    1.28 +	Selene just wiped at her eyes tearfully, taking a shuddering breath before
    1.29 +looking up at her the woman that would one day be her mother. 
    1.30 +“ChibiUsa-mama, do you
    1.31 +really love Hotaru-mama?” she asked in almost a hushed whisper.
    1.32 +	ChibiUsa was taken aback. Why did the little girl ask that? Was there any
    1.33 +question? Brushing a hand through her pink hair, she just blinked a few 
    1.34 +times. “Of course
    1.35 +I do. She’s everything to me.”
    1.36 +	Selene sniffled, wiping her eyes shakily with the back of her hand.
    1.37 +“Re…Really?”
    1.38 +	The pink haired girl nodded quickly to dispel the younger girl’s fears, 
    1.39 +wiping a
    1.40 +tear from her cheek. She smiled gently at Selene. “Really. She’s everything 
    1.41 +to me. I love
    1.42 +your Hotaru-mama with all my heart.” This seemed to appease the younger 
    1.43 +girl, drawing
    1.44 +forth a small smile from her. ChibiUsa smiled softly, but something still 
    1.45 +concerned her.
    1.46 +Something felt wrong… “Why did you ask?”
    1.47 +	The dark haired odangoed girl rubbed at her eyes with small fists before 
    1.48 +looking
    1.49 +up at ChibiUsa again. “An angel told me. She was really pretty, with pink 
    1.50 +hair kinda like
    1.51 +yours, but it was past her shoulders. She was all shimmery and had a white 
    1.52 +dress on that
    1.53 +was really long and pretty, too. She said that it wasn’t enough.”
    1.54 +	“That what wasn’t enough?” ChibiUsa asked encouragingly, wanting to know
    1.55 +what had gotten the younger girl so upset.
    1.56 +	“That you didn’t love her enough…” Selene said quietly, looking down.
    1.57 +	ChibiUsa shook her head emphatically. “No, that’s absurd. I love Hotaru 
    1.58 +more
    1.59 +than anything. How could I not love her enough?” she demanded, her heart 
    1.60 +starting to
    1.61 +ache from the very idea.
    1.62 +	“I.. I don’t know…” Selene barely got out, on the verge of tears.
    1.63 +	ChibiUsa closed her eyes, taking a deep breath. It was nothing, just a 
    1.64 +figment of
    1.65 +Selene’s imagination. Sure it was kind of odd, but that was just not even 
    1.66 +worth worrying
    1.67 +about. Of course she loved Hotaru enough. She slowly smiled again, hugging 
    1.68 +the smaller
    1.69 +girl. “It’s going to be alright, Selene. Whatever it was, it was wrong. I 
    1.70 +love Hotaru with
    1.71 +all my heart.” ChibiUsa’s words reassured both herself and Selene. Smiling a 
    1.72 +little
    1.73 +brighter, ChibiUsa tilted her head to the side. “Want to get some ice cream? 
    1.74 +We can
    1.75 +forget all about this.”
    1.76 +	Selene jumped up and down excitedly. “Hai!! Thanks, ChibiUsa-mama! You’re
    1.77 +the best!” She hugged ChibiUsa tightly, already starting to forget her odd 
    1.78 +vision.
    1.79 +
    1.80 +	They were finally alone. That was the first thought that ran through 
    1.81 +ChibiUsa’s
    1.82 +head as she walked hand in hand with Hotaru to the beach house. In the 
    1.83 +distance, the two
    1.84 +could hear Haruka’s car driving off. She’d be there to pick them up in a few 
    1.85 +days. In the
    1.86 +meantime, that left the lovers alone with each other at the beach house. No 
    1.87 +children, no
    1.88 +schoolwork, no responsibility. Juts the wonderful feeling of being together. 
    1.89 +They had
    1.90 +come out here to be alone, a birthday present Hotaru had given her so they 
    1.91 +could spend
    1.92 +the next few days together without a care in the world. ChibiUsa smiled 
    1.93 +brightly at the
    1.94 +dark haired girl, squeezing her hand slightly.  The pale girl’s hand 
    1.95 +squeezed back as
    1.96 +Hotaru turned to her with a smile.
    1.97 +	As they stood in front of the doors, ChibiUsa felt an almost overwhelming 
    1.98 +sense
    1.99 +of fear and regret overtake her. As if her whole life would change by 
   1.100 +walking through
   1.101 +those doors. She leaned against Hotaru, holding her arm tightly.
   1.102 +	“ChibiUsa-chan?” Hotaru looked at her worriedly. Her usually cheerful
   1.103 +complexion was now deathly pale. Hotaru’s arm started to ache from the death 
   1.104 +grip
   1.105 +ChibiUsa had on it. The raven haired girl started to panic, barely holding 
   1.106 +herself in check
   1.107 +for ChibiUsa’s sake. This was so unlike the vibrant future princess. What 
   1.108 +could be so
   1.109 +horribly wrong?
   1.110 +	Taking a deep, soothing breath, ChibiUsa smiled calmly at Hotaru, 
   1.111 +suppressing
   1.112 +the wave of emotions that had passed over her. “Its nothing. I just haven’t 
   1.113 +been getting
   1.114 +much sleep lately because of the twins. And Kousagi’s been keeping me up 
   1.115 +whenever
   1.116 +I’m at my house, so that’s it.” She giggled at the skeptical look Hotaru 
   1.117 +threw her.
   1.118 +“Really, its nothing. You worry too much, Hota-chan. Let’s just enjoy 
   1.119 +ourselves. You and
   1.120 +me.”
   1.121 +	Beautiful crimson eyes gazed brightly at her as the future princess’s arm 
   1.122 +went
   1.123 +around Hotaru’s waist. Hotaru felt herself relaxing in ChibiUsa’s grasp. If 
   1.124 +ChibiUsa was
   1.125 +okay, then there really wasn’t anything for her to be worrying about. The 
   1.126 +nervousness
   1.127 +slowly started to ebb away, replaced by a warm feeling her heart as her 
   1.128 +violet eyes befell
   1.129 +the pink haired goddess before her. Hotaru smiled softly. “Hai, its your 
   1.130 +birthday, so if
   1.131 +that’s what you want to do, I’m all for it.” Leaning forward, her lips 
   1.132 +lightly brushed
   1.133 +ChibiUsa’s. “Happy birthday, Odango-chan.”
   1.134 +	“I can’t think of a better way to spend my birthday,” ChibiUsa said, 
   1.135 +grinning.
   1.136 +
   1.137 +	ChibiUsa rolled over for what had to be the eighth time that night.
   1.138 +No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't get to sleep. And that usually
   1.139 +wasn't a problem for her whenever she had Hotaru right beside her. Their
   1.140 +clothes lay scattered on the floor, their bodies entangled under the sheets.
   1.141 +ChibiUsa held the frail girl close, the feel of her bare skin reminding her
   1.142 +of the passionate moment they'd shared not long ago. The raven haired girl,
   1.143 +who had enough trouble sleeping normally, was fast asleep next to her. She
   1.144 +was tired after what they'd done, but she couldn't get to sleep. Closing her
   1.145 +eyes just made matters worse. She sighed, her hands covering her face in
   1.146 +frustration. Why was it bothering her? She knew she loved Hotaru, that's
   1.147 +all that mattered. So why couldn't she get to sleep? All day, Hotaru had 
   1.148 +been
   1.149 +pretending nothing was wrong, trying to hide her worry while ChibiUsa had
   1.150 +been dancing around the subject and trying to reassure Hotaru that
   1.151 +everything was alright. Neither had been able to enjoy themselves because
   1.152 +of how she was acting. Sitting up in bed, the pink haired girl slowly
   1.153 +disentangled herself from her sleeping lover. She knew she wouldn’t be
   1.154 +getting any sleep tonight.
   1.155 +	Her thoughts in a jumble, ChibiUsa slipped off the bed, her toes
   1.156 +moving against the soft feel of the carpet. Tilting her head to the side,
   1.157 +ChibiUsa gazed at the raven haired girl alone in the bed for a what felt 
   1.158 +like
   1.159 +an eternity. Her fingers gingerly followed the contours of Hotaru’s 
   1.160 +beautiful
   1.161 +face, brushing past her soft lips, warm cheeks, and finally through
   1.162 +midnight black hair. She leaned down, brushing some of Hotaru’s dark hair
   1.163 +back. Her lips gently pressed against Hotaru’s as her fingers stroked down
   1.164 +to the pale girl’s neck. Something wet rolled down ChibiUsa’s cheek down
   1.165 +to Hotaru’s, startling the pink haired girl. Slowly pulling away, a hand 
   1.166 +went
   1.167 +to her face. Another tear rolled down her cheek. “I’m crying? Why am I
   1.168 +crying?” she asked herself in a daze. The pink haired girl balled up her 
   1.169 +fists
   1.170 +in frustration, shutting her eyes tightly as a wave of sadness swept through
   1.171 +her body. An icy pit formed in her stomach as more tears started falling.
   1.172 +‘I’m supposed to be happy. I’ve got everything I could ever want. I have
   1.173 +you, Hota-chan. I love you.” A sob punctuated her declaration of love, her
   1.174 +hand wiping at the still forming tears in her crimson eyes.
   1.175 +	Looking down at Hotaru, ChibiUsa’s fingers lightly brushed her
   1.176 +cheek again. Part of her wanted to wake the sleeping angel, to try to tell 
   1.177 +her
   1.178 +the jumble of emotions going through her. But she couldn’t bring herself to
   1.179 +wake the raven haired girl up. Each time she’d try, she stopped herself just
   1.180 +before she could. What would Hotaru think? She wouldn’t think… ChibiUsa
   1.181 +pulled her hand away from Hotaru’s pale skin as if burned. Selene’s words
   1.182 +burst into her mind. ‘That you didn’t love her enough…’ She shook her head
   1.183 +violently, her hands going through her pink hair as a lonely wail escaped 
   1.184 +her lips. “That
   1.185 +can’t be it. It can’t be….” She desperately wanted to shake Hotaru awake, to 
   1.186 +tell her just
   1.187 +how much she loved her, to here Hotaru tell her she knows, that she’s always 
   1.188 +known. But
   1.189 +ChibiUsa still couldn’t bring herself to disturb the raven haired girl’s 
   1.190 +peaceful slumber.
   1.191 +So often, Hotaru would look tormented in her sleep. This would just ruin one 
   1.192 +of the few
   1.193 +restful slumbers that Hotaru’s had. “I’m being selfish, Hota-chan. I’ll be 
   1.194 +okay. I can
   1.195 +handle this.”
   1.196 +	With that, the future princess headed out the door of their bedroom, 
   1.197 +padding
   1.198 +across the plush carpet. At first she didn’t know where she was going, but 
   1.199 +she quickly
   1.200 +realized the path she was taking. The Mirror. Of course! How could she have 
   1.201 +been so
   1.202 +blind? Michiru had lent ChibiUsa her hand mirror for their trip to the beach 
   1.203 +house, telling
   1.204 +her the talisman would keep them safe. The mirror could show the truth, no 
   1.205 +matter how
   1.206 +hidden it may be. She could easily look into that to see how deep her 
   1.207 +feelings for Hotaru
   1.208 +ran. After proving them to her satisfaction, she could be off to bed and 
   1.209 +cuddling with her
   1.210 +firefly. She grinned happily as she made her way to the mirror, lying unused 
   1.211 +on a table in
   1.212 +the living room. ChibiUsa felt almost dizzy as she picked up the mirror. It 
   1.213 +was cold to the
   1.214 +touch. Something in the back of her mind told her to put it down, that how 
   1.215 +dare she
   1.216 +question their love. Afterall, it didn’t matter that Hotaru’s hair wasn’t 
   1.217 +pink.  She wet her
   1.218 +parched lips nervously, the icy pit in her stomach returning a hundred fold. 
   1.219 +Holding the
   1.220 +mirror up, she gazed into it. Rather than a direct reflection, the image in 
   1.221 +the mirror was of
   1.222 +her as a princess. The truth. Taking a deep breath, ignoring the warnings in 
   1.223 +the back of
   1.224 +her head, ChibiUsa concentrated on the mirror. “Show me the depths of my 
   1.225 +love.”
   1.226 +
   1.227 +	She ran, ignoring the sharp pain of rocks scraping against the skin of her 
   1.228 +bare
   1.229 +feet, ignoring everything as she tried to get further and further away. Her 
   1.230 +hair, let down
   1.231 +from its normal odango style for the night, trailed behind her past her 
   1.232 +shoulders. Tears
   1.233 +blinded her, blurring her vision, but she didn’t care. Nothing mattered 
   1.234 +anymore. Nothing.
   1.235 +Her frantic thoughts swirled about in her mind like a whirlwind, jumbled 
   1.236 +beyond
   1.237 +coherency other than the deep pain she felt in her heart.
   1.238 +	As she ran along the rocky cliff face, barely even realizing where she was. 
   1.239 +She
   1.240 +wiped at her eyes desperately, stinging tears dripping wetly down her 
   1.241 +cheeks. ‘Why?!
   1.242 +Why?’ she thought, over and over again, begging for an answer, any answer to 
   1.243 +the pain
   1.244 +she felt. Her heart ached deeply, as if she’d been cut open by The Senshi of 
   1.245 +Death and
   1.246 +Rebirth herself. Was that how she truly felt? Was that what was to happen? 
   1.247 +She didn’t
   1.248 +return Hotaru’s feelings with half the blaze, half the sheer strength that 
   1.249 +Hotaru had in her
   1.250 +love for her. ChibiUsa shuddered, feeling cold inside. As if she’d been 
   1.251 +drowning in a
   1.252 +freezing river for so long and had only now opened her eyes. What could she 
   1.253 +say to
   1.254 +Hotaru? Anything she could say would only hurt her, ChibiUsa was sure. She 
   1.255 +hugged
   1.256 +herself tightly, her small body wracked by sobs as she continued her aimless 
   1.257 +running, her
   1.258 +only thoughts to escape the horror of her thoughts.
   1.259 +	So intent was she upon her fleeing that she never noticed where she was
   1.260 +running. The rocky ledge started to give way beneath her bare feet, a 
   1.261 +breathless scream
   1.262 +trapped forever in her lips as she fell. The princess barely felt the 
   1.263 +impact, everything
   1.264 +starting to fade out as she hit the shore below. She lay there, tears still 
   1.265 +running down her
   1.266 +cheeks, not even realizing she was taking her dying breath. “Taru…”
   1.267 +
   1.268 +	“ChibiUsa-chan!! ChibiUsa-chan, where are you?! Please, please come back to
   1.269 +me, ChibiUsa-chan….” Hotaru slumped to her knees in defeat, her dark skirt 
   1.270 +getting
   1.271 +sullied by the wet sand on the beach. Last night, ChibiUsa had seemed so 
   1.272 +upset about
   1.273 +something. She’d gone out to look for the pink haired future princess in the 
   1.274 +dark, but she
   1.275 +was nowhere to be found. Hotaru had hoped that she’d gone back to the beach 
   1.276 +house, but
   1.277 +no such luck. She had finally cried herself to sleep when she had gotten 
   1.278 +back to their
   1.279 +empty bed. Waking up, she had the false hope that she’d be in ChibiUsa’s 
   1.280 +arms and that
   1.281 +everything would be alright again. Now she had to wonder if things would 
   1.282 +ever be alright
   1.283 +from then on.
   1.284 +	Her black tights and dark clothes barely kept back the biting cold wind 
   1.285 +that blew
   1.286 +past her. Icy knives raked her face as she stumbled forward, wiping at her 
   1.287 +eyes with her
   1.288 +long sleeve. “ChibiUsa-chan…” She wanted to give up, to go back inside the 
   1.289 +warm house
   1.290 +and cry herself back to sleep. She hadn’t slept much the night before, so 
   1.291 +why not? What
   1.292 +could she hope to find out here? Something inside her pushed her on, 
   1.293 +spurring her
   1.294 +forward. Standing up again, the raven haired girl weakly made her way along 
   1.295 +the beach.
   1.296 +She nearly lost her footing in the wet sand, but kept going after steadying 
   1.297 +herself. She
   1.298 +trudged on and on, the lapping of the waves and the whistling of the wind 
   1.299 +the only sounds
   1.300 +around her.
   1.301 +	About to collapse from exhaustion, the raven haired girl’s attention was 
   1.302 +caught
   1.303 +by something up ahead. Something pink. She squinted, trying to make out what 
   1.304 +it could
   1.305 +be, praying that it was the girl she sought. She’d soon come to regret that 
   1.306 +as her prayers
   1.307 +were answered. As she ran to the other girl, she quickly noticed that 
   1.308 +ChibiUsa wasn’t
   1.309 +moving. Her pink hair was moving back and forth as the wind played with it. 
   1.310 +Her
   1.311 +normally immaculate white nightgown was stained with the brown of the wet 
   1.312 +sand and
   1.313 +streaks of crimson. Her body was lying in a heap, looking like a rag doll 
   1.314 +that had been
   1.315 +thrown aside.
   1.316 +	Hotaru ran as fast as she could, her heart catching in her chest. In her 
   1.317 +haste, her
   1.318 +foot caught on a rock, forcing her to tumble to the ground. She got up and 
   1.319 +pushed on,
   1.320 +despite the intense pain in her twisted ankle. It couldn’t rival the pain in 
   1.321 +her heart.
   1.322 +“ChibiUsa-chan!!!” she cried out, almost expecting the pink haired girl to 
   1.323 +sit up. Hot
   1.324 +tears poured down her cheeks as she fell to her knees besides the prone 
   1.325 +future princess.
   1.326 +“ChibiUsa-chan, get up. Please, get up,” the dark haired girl sobbed as her 
   1.327 +arms went
   1.328 +around the cold body of her one true love. She held ChibiUsa close, a tear 
   1.329 +falling onto
   1.330 +ChibiUsa’s cheek. The pink haired girl’s face looked almost the same as it 
   1.331 +had the night
   1.332 +before. Her large crimson eyes were glassy and looking up at Hotaru, her 
   1.333 +normally
   1.334 +vibrant cheeks now pale. Hotaru clutched onto ChibiUsa in her grief. She 
   1.335 +felt as if her
   1.336 +heart had been torn from her chest. As if a piece of her, the most important 
   1.337 +piece, had
   1.338 +been taken from her. “ChibiUsa-chan… Don’t leave me alone… I’m scared to be 
   1.339 +alone..
   1.340 +I need you with me, ChibiUsa-chan… I need you…” she barely managed to get 
   1.341 +out
   1.342 +through heart wrenching sobs. The painful realization that her lover was now 
   1.343 +dead kept
   1.344 +trying to impose itself on her mind, but she clung to the hope that she’d be 
   1.345 +okay, that she
   1.346 +would get up in her arms, returning the embrace.
   1.347 +	Hotaru stayed that way for a long time, ignoring everything around her as 
   1.348 +she
   1.349 +held the dead princess tightly against her. “Its like she’s asleep… She’s so 
   1.350 +pretty when
   1.351 +she’s asleep… Its like you’re taking a nap, ChibiUsa-chan. You sleep well, 
   1.352 +and I’ll be
   1.353 +here when you wake up… I’ll always be here when you awake. Because…” The 
   1.354 +dark
   1.355 +haired girl looked intently at the lost love in her arms, tears still 
   1.356 +streaming down her
   1.357 +cheeks. “I love you.”
   1.358 +
   1.359 +	A few hours later, a blue sports car stopped in front of the beach house.
   1.360 +A woman with sandy blonde hair stepped out of the car, holding her jacket 
   1.361 +tightly
   1.362 +around her as the sea breeze came in. Smiling to herself, she reached back 
   1.363 +in
   1.364 +the car and pulled out the last of ChibiUsa’s birthday presents, lovingly 
   1.365 +wrapped
   1.366 +in a deep violet wrapping paper with black lace ribbons. Hotaru had 
   1.367 +forgotten the
   1.368 +present she had been going to give ChibiUsa in her haste and Haruka hadn't
   1.369 +found it in the back of her car until she was well back to the city. She'd 
   1.370 +decided to
   1.371 +stop by the next day and return it to her daughter to give to the ChibiUsa.
   1.372 +Cinching her jacket around her, the tall woman made her way to the door of 
   1.373 +the
   1.374 +beach house and knocked on the door. “Hime-chan! Its me, Haruka-papa,” she
   1.375 +said after a few moments. There was no answer. Haruka frowned and tried the
   1.376 +door. She began to worry as the unlocked door opened. What could have
   1.377 +happened to the two girls? She commanded herself to stop worrying. They were
   1.378 +probably at the beach and left the door open for when they’d come back in.
   1.379 +Something out of the corner of her eye caught her attention. She
   1.380 +instantly recognized it as Michiru’s mirror. It was lying on the floor near 
   1.381 +one of the
   1.382 +tables in the living room as if someone had thrown in aside in a hurry. 
   1.383 +Haruka’s
   1.384 +heart started beating faster as she quickly searched the beach house. Her
   1.385 +surrogate daughter and the future princess were nowhere to be found. Rather
   1.386 +than waste time panicking, the blonde woman rushed out of the house, intent 
   1.387 +on
   1.388 +finding the two girls. Trudging out towards the beach, she couldn’t help but 
   1.389 +shiver
   1.390 +as the biting wind increased. It was too cold to be swimming. They couldn’t 
   1.391 +be
   1.392 +out here for that. Then why… Haruka shook her head. She wouldn’t allow 
   1.393 +herself
   1.394 +to assume the worst yet. First things first. She had to find them.
   1.395 +	After what felt like hours of walking, but must have been considerably
   1.396 +less, Haruka thought she heard a faint voice being carried by the wind. A 
   1.397 +voice
   1.398 +filled with utter despair and hopelessness. A voice that had lost any of the 
   1.399 +joy
   1.400 +and wonder life had to offer. At first, she thought it was only the wind, 
   1.401 +but the soft
   1.402 +voice continued. Haruka finally caught sight of a girl dressed entirely in 
   1.403 +black, her
   1.404 +rave hair being whipped around by the wind as she clutched onto something
   1.405 +protectively. The blonde woman ran to her surrogate daughter, determined to
   1.406 +make sure everything was okay. He stopped dead in her tracks when she saw
   1.407 +the lifeless form of a once happy pink haired girl in Hotaru’s arms. “My 
   1.408 +God….”
   1.409 +She gasped.
   1.410 +	Hotaru didn’t even look up, not noticing her Haruka-papa’s arrival. “So
   1.411 +pretty when you sleep like this. And I’ll watch over you forever, my 
   1.412 +sleeping
   1.413 +beauty….” Hotaru’s fingers gently brushed over ChibiUsa’s cold lips as she
   1.414 +continued rambling semi-coherently. “Forever.”
   1.415 +
   1.416 +
   1.417 +"It's so cold..."                                                     .
   1.418 +	Ever since what had happened, Hotaru kept a nearly steady monologue.
   1.419 +The silence meant she was alone again.. always alone.. forever..  And she 
   1.420 +didn't
   1.421 +want to be left alone.  Not now, not ever.  Everything that had happened.. 
   1.422 +it
   1.423 +was like a whole new person.  "It's not me.  Silly.  I'm watching myself.. 
   1.424 +like
   1.425 +on a screen..."
   1.426 +	All around her, the room seemed bare, stripped of everything.  Her
   1.427 +normally dark room was even darker without the beautiful shining lamps to 
   1.428 +soften
   1.429 +it.  "But the lamps were too dangerous, ne, Michiru-mama?  You wouldn't want
   1.430 +me
   1.431 +to break one and use the glass to slit my wrists.  You want me to suffer.."
   1.432 +	The dark-haired girl, long out of tears, looked over everything she had
   1.433 +left.  The bed was bare, so she couldn't strangle herself with the sheets.  
   1.434 +Her
   1.435 +beautiful lamps had been replaced by three solemn candles.  She only had her
   1.436 +books.. her only escape for so many years before was her only option now.  
   1.437 +Or..
   1.438 +	That seemed a lifetime ago to the grief-stricken girl.  "Oh, back then,
   1.439 +no-one cared if I lived or I died.. Kaori-baka would've been GLAD to see me 
   1.440 +go.
   1.441 +And.. if I'd died then... she wouldn't..."  Closing her eyes tight and 
   1.442 +trying
   1.443 +to remove the image from her mind, she thought over her options.  Ever since
   1.444 +her parents set up this suicide watch, after that first night alone, she'd 
   1.445 +had
   1.446 +no privacy, not even a chance to mourn in peace.  She'd just been almost 
   1.447 +locked
   1.448 +in her room, from how they treated her outside it, and even then one of them
   1.449 +would check on her every few minutes, even if she was asleep.
   1.450 +	All she had left were her books..
   1.451 +	"They say history repeats.. I know.. I watched it.. over and over..  An
   1.452 +endless loop.  I was alone then.. I'm alone now.. oh, ChibiUsa-chan.. why
   1.453 +couldn't I have died instead?"
   1.454 +	The desk was gone.  The shelves, the table, the chairs - all taken out.
   1.455 +All that was left were her books and her bed.. and the candles.  Near a 
   1.456 +corner,
   1.457 +the remains of her diary sat.  She'd tried to communicate that way, writing
   1.458 +everything using the stub of a pencil Setsuna-mama had finally agreed to 
   1.459 +give
   1.460 +her.  After the first hundred pages or so, she'd realized she wasn't making 
   1.461 +any
   1.462 +sense at all, and questioned the point of it.  But, then again, what were 
   1.463 +all
   1.464 +of her diaries for?  All the secrets, every little thing, kept in meticulous
   1.465 +detail... "No-one could understand.  I couldn't let them understnd.  They'd 
   1.466 +see
   1.467 +and they wouldn't understand.. the only person who could ever understand is
   1.468 +dead.  Saturn!  Where are you now?  If you're truly the Messiah, reigning 
   1.469 +over
   1.470 +Death and Rebirth, then tell me why!"
   1.471 +	But, then, an idea came.. and in her broken mind, with its broken soul,
   1.472 +living a lifeless shell in a grey world without even the comfort of trust, 
   1.473 +it
   1.474 +made perfect sense.
   1.475 +	No-one would understand.  So why let them try?
   1.476 +	She stood, shakily, blinking and wiping her bloodshot eyes.  It would
   1.477 +still be a few minutes at least, until someone checked on her.  Praying it
   1.478 +would be long enough, she set to work, seperating her books from her diaries
   1.479 +and journals, her secrets..  Making a pile, she begin to organize it all, 
   1.480 +bit
   1.481 +by bit, working slowly and carefully.  It was almost time.
   1.482 +	Her work was interrupted by a knock at her door.  "Hime-chan?  Is
   1.483 +everything okay?"  It was Haruka-papa, come to make sure she hadn't died.
   1.484 +Not responding, she waited for the blonde woman to open the door and
   1.485 +check.  "Hime-chan?"  The door slowly creaked open, and Haruka stuck her
   1.486 +head
   1.487 +inside.  "I know it's hard for you, Hime-chan.  But we have to be sure."  
   1.488 +When
   1.489 +Hotaru didn't even bother to look up, Haruka just sighed and shut the door
   1.490 +again.
   1.491 +	Alone once more, the girl set her plan into motion.  Tearing pages out,
   1.492 +shredding some, pulling some into strips, leaving some notebooks whole, she
   1.493 +prepared.  All of her work, everything she had left, everything she was.. it
   1.494 +was all here.  And with a touch of the candle..
   1.495 +	It took a minute or so to catch.  Hotaru blew on the small fire,
   1.496 +letting it grow at its own pace.  She knew that the smoke alarm's batteries 
   1.497 +had
   1.498 +been dead for weeks, and since everyone was asleep or downstairs, there'd be
   1.499 +no-one to stop her.  Page by page, she fed the fire.. whole years of her 
   1.500 +life,
   1.501 +burning away.  "It's warm, ChibiUsa-chan.. can you feel it?  It's not like
   1.502 +everything else..  This is how it has to be, now.  If I can't die.. I'll 
   1.503 +make
   1.504 +it so I was never around in the first place.  Without these for people to
   1.505 +remember me by, I'll just fade away.  No-one cares but you, ChibiUsa-chan..
   1.506 +no-one....  They want me to live on, forget the past.  Find someone to 
   1.507 +console
   1.508 +me and love me.  Be happy.  I've never been happy, ChibiUsa-chan.  I can't 
   1.509 +ever
   1.510 +remember being happy.  Not without you..."
   1.511 +	The flickering flames glittered, reflected in her sad, tired eyes.. so
   1.512 +tired, so old.. dead.
   1.513 +	The fire spread to the floor, spread through the room.  By now, it was
   1.514 +quite obvious that the room was ablaze, if not the whole house.  And Haruka,
   1.515 +just now noticing the smell, was quick to run up and check on her 
   1.516 +dark-haired
   1.517 +princess.  Sirens could be heard, off in the distance.. a neighbor saw the
   1.518 +flame, the firefighters would arrive soon.
   1.519 +	Haruka arrived just in time to pull the firefly from the heart of the
   1.520 +fire before anything more than her hair and clothes were singed.  The girl 
   1.521 +was
   1.522 +unconscious, passed out from the lack of sleep and the fumes of the books'
   1.523 +bindings as they caught.
   1.524 +
   1.525 +	Two figures watched from the shadows.
   1.526 +	Children.
   1.527 +	It almost seemed they were part of the background.. a piece that
   1.528 +doesn't quite fit, that everyone overlooks..
   1.529 +	One spoke.  Her voice quiet, almost detached.
   1.530 +	"Shisa?"
   1.531 +	"Yes, Selene?"
   1.532 +	"Do you think we went too far?  I mean.."
   1.533 +	They watched, as their mother was revived by her Haruka-papa.  As she
   1.534 +was doomed to ever live, lifeless.
   1.535 +	"Yes, Selene."
   1.536 +	"Oh.. look, Shisa!  I can see through us.  We're fading.... Shisa?"
   1.537 +	"Yes, Selene?"
   1.538 +	"I am the wind.. look!  Whoosh!"
   1.539 +	A gust of wind came, as the window was broken in by a firefighter.
   1.540 +The two figures seemed to dissipate, with the smoke..
   1.541 +