1.1 --- /dev/null	Thu Jan 01 00:00:00 1970 +0000
     1.2 +++ b/old/stories/dearsakura-21.txt	Fri Feb 19 20:53:12 2010 -0500
     1.3 @@ -0,0 +1,237 @@
     1.4 +Dear Sakura
     1.5 +by Amazoness Duo and G.P.
     1.6 +amazonessduo@hotmail.com
     1.7 +pearsong1954@yahoo.com
     1.8 +
     1.9 +In the garden, Sakura sat on the stone bench and gazed up into the
    1.10 +night sky. She was ineffably happy, but couldn't stop crying. At last
    1.11 +she understood. The auburn-haired woman loved Tomoyo more than anyone
    1.12 +in the world. She always loved her, but never knew. So many things
    1.13 +finally made sense: embarrassed feelings around her adoring friend,
    1.14 +the tortured longings suffered since arriving in Hong Kong, and the
    1.15 +sheer joy of seeing the lavender-haired woman again. And then, there
    1.16 +was the kiss that filled her soul with fire and light. No, kisses,
    1.17 +she thought blushingly. Tomoyo kissing her on this very spot, and
    1.18 +Sakura kissing the lovely girl as they danced. Kisses. She touched
    1.19 +her lips with trembling fingers. When they kissed the world melted
    1.20 +away, leaving only the two of them. Opening her eyes, Sakura felt a
    1.21 +crimson blush creep up her neck, coloring her delicate cheek. I want
    1.22 +to kiss her again, she thought. Again, and again, and again.
    1.23 +
    1.24 +Most people lucky enough to realize their true love begin to
    1.25 +consider how their feelings fit into the complex calculus of human
    1.26 +relations. They worry about other lovers, wives or husbands, jobs and
    1.27 +money, threats and opportunities. Had Sakura considered all this, it
    1.28 +might have shaken her gentle, genki spirit. She was married and far
    1.29 +away from her true love. Tomoyo, she thought, was in love with
    1.30 +someone else entirely, traveling a path that took her further and
    1.31 +further away. Were she to cast a cold, clear eye on the situation,
    1.32 +her trickling tears of happiness might quickly become a river of
    1.33 +grief and regret. But Sakura's greatest power, that everything would
    1.34 +be all right, was no mere facade, or posture, or consolation. It was
    1.35 +who she was. So, sitting on the bench she felt joy and elation, not
    1.36 +worry and fear. Only knowing the agony that Tomoyo was even then
    1.37 +enduring might have shaken the heart of the little Cardmistress. But
    1.38 +of that pain, she was unaware, save for the dim echoes of a distant
    1.39 +dream. For Sakura true love, once unlocked, was a source of utter
    1.40 +bliss.
    1.41 +
    1.42 +She stayed in that spot for hours, as if some magic lingered from
    1.43 +her discovery of love. She marveled that in all those years with
    1.44 +Tomoyo it had never occurred to her before. She shook her head and
    1.45 +smiled, feeling slightly foolish, as she always did when something
    1.46 +simple that had eluded her finally came clear. But for all that, it
    1.47 +was she who had finally realized her own feelings. How strange that
    1.48 +the love in her heart was so different from what she and everyone
    1.49 +else had thought her love should be. Her friends had nudged her in
    1.50 +the direction of Syaoran, and she had accepted the rightness of their
    1.51 +wisdom. Not that she blamed them. If fault there was it was hers, for
    1.52 +not knowing what she should have known in the first place. And she
    1.53 +did like Syaoran; loved him, even. But it was more like the love felt
    1.54 +for a friend. Her love for Tomoyo was unique, unlike anything else in
    1.55 +her life. No joy or happiness could compare to the exquisite
    1.56 +sweetness of this realization. And Sakura felt a tiny light of pride
    1.57 +that she herself had come to understand what no one else did. But
    1.58 +then, she really owed this new found knowledge to Dark and Light-
    1.59 +sama's insistence that only she could solve the riddle of her
    1.60 +feelings. Remembering this, she felt a sickening shame for arrogantly
    1.61 +demanding they reveal her true feelings. Glancing up at the stars
    1.62 +dotting the velvet sky, she sensed for the very first time the dread
    1.63 +burden of her distant ancestor, Clow Reed. A burden she now shared.
    1.64 +
    1.65 +By capturing and transmuting the Cards, Sakura possessed an
    1.66 +incalculable power. Confronting Light and Dark, she had threatened
    1.67 +the use of that power to cow the will of another. She came perilously
    1.68 +close to forcing the beautiful but haughty Light sama to do her
    1.69 +bidding. Even then, poised on the brink, she sensed the unease and
    1.70 +fear that her power commanded. What would have happened had Dark-sama
    1.71 +not intervened? Here was the night's second realization, but it felt
    1.72 +very different form the joy of discovering her true love. Gazing at
    1.73 +the garden, Sakura watched the beautiful plants and flowers
    1.74 +shimmering in the moonlight. Once she had complimented her father on
    1.75 +his garden, and asked him how he made the plants so pretty. Smiling,
    1.76 +he told her that he couldn't make them do anything, and would only
    1.77 +hurt them if he tried, 
    1.78 +
    1.79 +"They want to grow and be lovely all by themselves. I just have to
    1.80 +be here and help them do what they want." As with flowers, so with
    1.81 +magic. Sakura swore never again to use her power to dominate another
    1.82 +will. She vaguely sensed where this dark path would lead, and the
    1.83 +realization chilled her. Closing her eyes, she vowed never again to
    1.84 +take a single step along so frightful a path. In fact, she would
    1.85 +start by apologizing again to Dark and Light-sama, thanking them for
    1.86 +allowing her to make her own discovery of love.
    1.87 +
    1.88 +When she had returned to the room and summoned them forth, Dark and
    1.89 +Light regarded her stumbling apologies with smiling grace. Finally,
    1.90 +Light spoke up in a glowing voice that lit Tomoyo's guestroom,
    1.91 +"Sakura-chan has learned two wonderful things tonight! Remember this
    1.92 +lesson, but do not allow it to dim your bright spirit."
    1.93 +
    1.94 +Gently brushing back Sakura's hair, much as a mother would do, the
    1.95 +glimmering woman kissed her softly on the cheek. Sakura blushed and
    1.96 +glowed, and Dark-sama tittered merrily behind her hand. In a
    1.97 +whispering voice the shadowy beauty asked the little Cardmistress,
    1.98 +"Now that you know of your love for Tomoyo-chan, what are you going
    1.99 +to tell her?"
   1.100 +
   1.101 +Sakura looked thoughtful and then shook her head. With a radiant
   1.102 +smile she replied, "I don't really know. I want to tell her. Aiyaaa,
   1.103 +I have to tell her! I couldn't keep something like this a secret. But
   1.104 +I don't want to do it over the phone, or in a letter. I don't know
   1.105 +when she is coming back to Hong Kong . Oh, oh, maybe I could go back
   1.106 +home for a visit, back to Tomoeda, I mean. I really miss my family,
   1.107 +and was hoping to visit for Christmas, anyway. I could tell her
   1.108 +then!" 
   1.109 +
   1.110 +Sakura remembered all the wonderful Christmases of the past. She
   1.111 +remembered decorating the tree, perched precariously on a ladder as
   1.112 +her pink-robed friend plugged in the lights. The tree blazed forth a
   1.113 +rainbow of light, bathing the girls in multicolored hues as they
   1.114 +snuggled together and sipped hot cocoa. She remembered hearing
   1.115 +Tomoyo's beautiful voice in the Christmas Concerts, sweet and strong.
   1.116 +Though Tomoyo said she sang for the one she loved, everyone shared in
   1.117 +the blessing of hearing her glorious voice. Finally, Sakura thought
   1.118 +of all the delightful presents the dark-haired girl had given her.
   1.119 +Each was carefully chosen, an offering of love from her very best
   1.120 +friend, brightly wrapped with beautiful paper, skillfully tied up
   1.121 +with satiny bows and ribbons.  
   1.122 +
   1.123 +"This will be my Christmas present to her," Sakura said happily, "so
   1.124 +she knows that someone loves her more than anyone else in the world."
   1.125 +She blushed as she thought of the two of them under the mistletoe.
   1.126 +She longed to kiss Tomoyo, and caught her breath at the memory of
   1.127 +those petal-soft lips. Opening her eyes, Sakura felt a crimson flush
   1.128 +of embarrassment blending with her blushing desire, and smiled
   1.129 +sheepishly as Dark and Light laughed and smiled. 
   1.130 +
   1.131 +The three talked long into the night, Sakura gaily recounting her
   1.132 +adventures with Tomoyo while the two regal women listened and giggled
   1.133 +like little girls, their hearts thrilled at the sheer joy of their
   1.134 +Mistress' discovery. Finally, after recounting the wonderful night
   1.135 +she dined and danced with her friend on the eve of her departure,
   1.136 +Sakura jumped up in a burst of inspiration. Chanting the words of
   1.137 +power, she summoned forth Flower, who appeared amidst a burst of
   1.138 +scented blossoms. Grinning, Sakura bowed low, and Flower graciously
   1.139 +accepted the offer to dance. 
   1.140 +
   1.141 +The two swirled about the guest room, magically expanded to a dance
   1.142 +floor that stretched to infinity. Holding Flower close, Sakura cried,
   1.143 +half in joy and half in longing, remembering the pale girl nestled in
   1.144 +her arms. In memory was pain and promise, a world that lingered in
   1.145 +her heart. Sakura's tears dotted the air like sparkling diamonds.
   1.146 +Tomoyo was far away, yet with her still, and ever would be. As she
   1.147 +danced, Sakura felt the delicate softness of Flower's supple body
   1.148 +underneath the taffeta frills of her elaborate costume. She ached to
   1.149 +hold her pale friend close, to kiss her and caress her and unlock all
   1.150 +of Love’s secrets. She yearned for Tomoyo, for that perfect intimacy
   1.151 +they shared when they were together. She loved Tomoyo beyond words,
   1.152 +thought, and life itself. As she hugged Flower tightly, the sweet
   1.153 +pain of separation tore at her heart. Twirling in a storm of petals,
   1.154 +Sakura danced to remember, and to forget, and for the sheer joy of
   1.155 +music and motion. She caught the eyes of her partner, and they
   1.156 +shimmered like the trembling dew that clings to a rose in early morn.
   1.157 +Suddenly, a wave of love crashed over Sakua, drowning her as she
   1.158 +cried for a woman far across the sea. 
   1.159 +
   1.160 +"Tomoyo-chan," she sobbed, over and over, "Tomoyo-chan, Tomoyo-
   1.161 +chan." The ecstasy and pain of a longing heart was hers at last.
   1.162 +Sakura wept until Dark-sama gently caressed her brow and brought the
   1.163 +peace of sleep. She slumbered dreamily on the silken quilt that had
   1.164 +graced her beloved friend. The three women stood around their
   1.165 +Mistress, watching over her, and smiling through their magical
   1.166 +tears.  
   1.167 +
   1.168 +Sakura awoke entangled in dreams, slow to realize just where she
   1.169 +was. Catching the faint, lingering scent of Tomoyo, she blushingly
   1.170 +realized the place she had slept. Smiling, she stretched and rose,
   1.171 +looking out the window into the bright light of day. It's so late,
   1.172 +she thought with a start, and then remembered with relief that it was
   1.173 +Saturday. Her mind wandered to the night before, to her wonderful
   1.174 +discovery, and the delightful night with Dark-sama, Light-sama, and
   1.175 +Flower. As the luscious ache of love gripped her again, she felt
   1.176 +unbearably happy and unbearably sad. Hugging herself tightly, she
   1.177 +whispered the name, "Tomoyo-chan", just to hear the sound of it.
   1.178 +Smiling, she sang to herself, "The mail should have come by now.
   1.179 +Maybe there's a letter!" 
   1.180 +
   1.181 +Jumping up, she raced down the hallway and saw white envelopes
   1.182 +stuffed in the little whicker basket. Excitedly rifling through them,
   1.183 +she recognized with joy and delight the creamy color that marked
   1.184 +Tomoyo's letters. With trembling hands she opened it, eager to hear
   1.185 +the voice of her friend within. Too thrilled to wait, she began
   1.186 +reading where she stood. But one word changed her blithe happiness to
   1.187 +a terrible uncertainty: goodbye.  She read it over and over, but
   1.188 +could not comprehend. Goodbye. She stared at the paper, as if it was
   1.189 +written in some indecipherable language: "Sakura-chan, I'm very
   1.190 +sorry, but I'll be going away soon. ...Goodbye, Sakura-chan."
   1.191 +Finally, the meaning wound it's way to her heart, and she dropped to
   1.192 +the floor, stunned. 
   1.193 +
   1.194 +On her knees she closed her eyes and whispered shakily, "No." Tomoyo
   1.195 +was leaving her, forever. She wanted to scream, but so deep was the
   1.196 +shock that she could only whimper. Her body tensed as a spasm of
   1.197 +terror shook her. Goodbye. Desolation welled up within, and her
   1.198 +vision grayed and narrowed, as if she were falling into a long, dark
   1.199 +tunnel. She teetered on the brink of fainting, but was suddenly drawn
   1.200 +back. Clenching her fists, a determined heart pounding in her chest,
   1.201 +she whispered again, but this time in a firm and steely voice,
   1.202 +
   1.203 +"No."
   1.204 +
   1.205 +She stood up, swaying and unsteady, gripping the armoire for
   1.206 +support. Seeing the nearby phone, she walked over and dialed a number
   1.207 +she knew by heart. A woman's voice answered,
   1.208 +
   1.209 +"Daidouji residence, may I help you?"
   1.210 +
   1.211 +Sakura's voice was precise and even, "Is Daidouji Tomoyo home?"
   1.212 +
   1.213 +"No, Ma'am, she is out. May I take a message for her when she
   1.214 +returns?"
   1.215 +
   1.216 +Sakura lowered the phone, which disconnected with a click. She
   1.217 +hesitated but a second, and then called the airport, booking the
   1.218 +first flight to Tokyo. Then she called her brother, and after the
   1.219 +briefest hello requested a ride. He was too startled to tease her,
   1.220 +let alone ask what was going on. After she confirmed her flight and
   1.221 +time, he scowled after she hung up with a curt goodbye. The final
   1.222 +call was for a taxi, which would arrive in a few minutes. Sprinting
   1.223 +to her room, she threw a few things into her duffle bag from school,
   1.224 +and began to rush out. But her eyes fell on the half-finished costume
   1.225 +Tomoyo had left, and impulsively she grabbed it and placed it gently
   1.226 +in the bag. The brassy honking of a car echoed down the hallway as
   1.227 +she ran. One of the maids stood in a doorway and gaped as she flew
   1.228 +by. With a sudden stop, she pivoted and ran back to the startled
   1.229 +girl. Sakura realized with embarrassment that she had forgotten her
   1.230 +name. With a smile she bowed and said all in a rush, 
   1.231 +
   1.232 +"Please tell Ieran-sama I had to fly to Japan. I'll call when I
   1.233 +arrive. Thank you!"
   1.234 +
   1.235 +With that, she burst out the door to the waiting taxi, leaving the
   1.236 +speechless maid behind. 
   1.237 +
   1.238 +
   1.239 +
   1.240 +