1.1 --- /dev/null	Thu Jan 01 00:00:00 1970 +0000
     1.2 +++ b/old/stories/dearsakura-11.txt	Fri Feb 19 20:53:12 2010 -0500
     1.3 @@ -0,0 +1,650 @@
     1.4 +Dear Sakura
     1.5 +by Amazoness Duo and G.P.
     1.6 +amazonessduo@hotmail.com
     1.7 +pearsong1954@yahoo.com
     1.8 +	 
     1.9 +“It’s beautiful, Sakura-chan!” Tomoyo’s melodious voice said as they
    1.10 +both paused in front of the Jumbo restaurant. Her words were an
    1.11 +understatement to the surreal view of the floating restaurant ahead
    1.12 +of the two women. Water splashed around it as the many lights played
    1.13 +across Tomoyo’s pale skin. 
    1.14 +	“Hoe...” The sight before them was a pleasant surprise to Sakura as
    1.15 +well. She had been to a number of restaurants with Syaoran when they
    1.16 +had first come to Hong Kong, but this hadn’t been one of them. Which
    1.17 +was part of her decision to take Tomoyo to it now that it was her
    1.18 +last night in Hong Kong. That thought lay over her soul like a heavy
    1.19 +cloak, it’s weight almost unbearable. But she tried to force it off,
    1.20 +wanting to enjoy what little time they had left. She had wanted to
    1.21 +take Tomoyo out for dinner, just the two of them. A chance to be
    1.22 +alone together one last time. Now she was glad for her decision. The
    1.23 +restaurant looked majestic with the waves crashing around it. 
    1.24 +	Watching her spirited friend, Tomoyo smiled happily to herself. For
    1.25 +all of it’s splendor, the restaurant ahead of them was nothing in
    1.26 +comparison to Sakura. She was simply gorgeous in the beautiful blue
    1.27 +Chinese dress she was wearing. Her soft brunette hair framed her
    1.28 +pretty face perfectly, her expression still one of surprise.
    1.29 +Squeezing Sakura’s hand lightly, her eyes sparkled when she saw
    1.30 +Sakura turn to her. This was wonderful, standing with Sakura together
    1.31 +while they waited to be seated at a restaurant as if they were on
    1.32 +some sort of magical date. Only being able to have the whole thing on
    1.33 +videotape could make it any better. Or perhaps if it were a real
    1.34 +date... But Tomoyo was pleasantly thrilled just to be there with
    1.35 +Sakura on something that came close enough to a date for her liking. 
    1.36 +	Sakura found herself blushing slightly at the way Tomoyo was
    1.37 +looking at her. It was the same warm and loving expression that
    1.38 +Tomoyo had always given her when she had the dark haired woman’s full
    1.39 +attention. Which was more often than not. She averted her gaze after
    1.40 +a few seconds, once again busying herself with the beautiful
    1.41 +establishment in front of them. She wasn’t sure what she’d say if she
    1.42 +kept looking into those stormy blue eyes. They were almost hypnotic.
    1.43 +“Well, we better get going before they decide to give away our
    1.44 +seats.” Tomoyo agreed enthusiastically and the two finally entered
    1.45 +the restaurant. 
    1.46 +	
    1.47 +	True to its gorgeous exterior, the inside was just as exquisite.
    1.48 +And completely packed. For a while, Sakura worried that even with her
    1.49 +reservations she wouldn’t be able to get a table. But the Li family
    1.50 +was very important in Hong Kong, and Sakura Li was treated no
    1.51 +differently. Before too long, she and her dark haired best friend had
    1.52 +been seated and their orders taken. “Are you sure that’s all you
    1.53 +want, Tomoyo-chan? You can get more if you want,” Sakura said upon
    1.54 +realizing how little the pale woman had ordered. Then again, Tomoyo
    1.55 +had never eaten a considerable amount, her slim figure almost seeming
    1.56 +frail. 
    1.57 +	Tomoyo smiled politely and shook her head, her beautiful lavender
    1.58 +tresses swaying behind her. “No, I’m fine, Sakura-chan. I think I’m
    1.59 +still full from the banquet. I don’t think I’ve ever seen so much
    1.60 +food in one place before. Poor Kero-chan must have been very
    1.61 +disappointed not to be invited.” Both women giggled softly, the
    1.62 +tension fading away somewhat. This was Tomoyo’s last night in Hong
    1.63 +Kong and though neither woman had spoken it directly, it was
    1.64 +lingering unsaid between the two of them. This was their last chance
    1.65 +together, and Tomoyo still hadn’t decided how she should react to it.
    1.66 +Her initial decision about the whole trip had been to hide her
    1.67 +feelings for Sakura, to tone down her endless affection for the
    1.68 +brunette in fear that it would be unwelcome with her marriage. 
    1.69 +But Sakura had baffled her upon her arrival. It was like returning
    1.70 +to a loved one after years of absence. She could imagine it was
    1.71 +similar to when Syaoran had returned to Sakura. She had greeted
    1.72 +Tomoyo with such warmth and affection, staying nearby during the
    1.73 +trip, her love almost seeming to echo Tomoyo’s own. It was eerie and
    1.74 +not at all what she had expected, but it had grasped onto her heart
    1.75 +quickly and wouldn’t let go. Sakura had always been very loving with
    1.76 +her, but this went beyond all of her own expectations. It was almost
    1.77 +as if Sakura’s love mirrored her own. It rattled the locked cage of
    1.78 +her heart, drawing her love and adoration out from behind the masks
    1.79 +she had erected. Hiding her love from Sakura was impossible, she knew
    1.80 +that now. It was all she could do to keep from blatantly telling
    1.81 +Sakura of her feelings, something she knew would certainly be
    1.82 +disastrous. If Sakura knew how she felt, it would cause endless
    1.83 +turmoil for her marriage and their friendship. She simply couldn’t
    1.84 +allow that. Sakura’s happiness meant everything to her. But still, it
    1.85 +was almost impossible to deny the feelings she was getting from the
    1.86 +brunette, the way she had kissed back, the way she was acting. When
    1.87 +was the last time she had seen Sakura acting like this? With Yukito?
    1.88 +No, this didn’t have the same trappings of a crush that her behavior
    1.89 +with Yukito had indicated to Tomoyo early on. Which led up to some
    1.90 +very confusing conclusions for the dark haired designer. She was
    1.91 +having a much harder time telling herself that there was nothing
    1.92 +there. Looking into Sakura’s eyes, seeing those bright emerald orbs
    1.93 +looking back into hers, she could see something that both thrilled
    1.94 +and frightened her. 
    1.95 +There was something there that was growing inside Sakura. Just what
    1.96 +it was, Tomoyo was still left a little unsure. Her mind kept
    1.97 +returning to the kiss and moments before when Sakura had been holding
    1.98 +her. The one thing Tomoyo could be sure of was that she would soon
    1.99 +begin to disrupt Sakura’s life if she allowed these feelings of the
   1.100 +Cardmistress’s to continue. Sakura had a husband, a new life in Hong
   1.101 +Kong. Tomoyo was an anchor tying her down to the past. Perhaps now
   1.102 +more than ever. She had wanted to come to Hong Kong as a way to help
   1.103 +Sakura let go of the past, but it seemed that she was making it
   1.104 +worse. It was painful being so near Sakura, loving her so completely
   1.105 +while knowing that she was still married to her true love. So close,
   1.106 +yet so far. Look, but don’t touch. It felt as if she were an infinite
   1.107 +distance away from Sakura at times when they were only feet apart.
   1.108 +But her love could travel that distance. Even if Sakura couldn’t see
   1.109 +it. Was Syaoran really Sakura’s true love? The dark haired woman had
   1.110 +been so intent on finding the person that could make Sakura happy
   1.111 +that she had truly believed it was Syaoran. Now she wasn’t so sure.
   1.112 +After Ieran’s words and her time spent with Sakura, she couldn’t be
   1.113 +so certain that he was anymore. But it was too late for any of that.
   1.114 +He had to be the one for Sakura. He had to. And Tomoyo could do
   1.115 +nothing but disrupt that, tearing apart Sakura’s happiness by staying
   1.116 +with her. 
   1.117 +That was why she had decided late the night before, through many
   1.118 +tears and much heartache, that this was goodbye. Not that she could
   1.119 +come out and tell Sakura that, of course. Or that she would even act
   1.120 +on it all at once. No, this was their last time together. She would
   1.121 +never return to Hong Kong after this trip. She was now more sure than
   1.122 +ever that the only way to keep Sakura truly happy was to fade out of
   1.123 +her life. Staying would be too painful for the brunette as her
   1.124 +feelings became more confusing and as Tomoyo remained an ever present
   1.125 +reminder of her past. She had to admit that part of her reasoning was
   1.126 +that she couldn’t handle it herself. After being so close to Sakura,
   1.127 +feeling her heart in a new way and sharing her first kiss with her
   1.128 +best friend, it was too painful to remain in her life knowing that
   1.129 +she was no longer necessary to it. So she would fade away. Slowly at
   1.130 +first, until she could slip out of Sakura’s life. By then she would
   1.131 +be nothing more than a memory in Sakura’s happy life. A memory that
   1.132 +would not be missed. 
   1.133 +Smiling her sweet, happy smile that she always managed to keep up
   1.134 +for Sakura's sake, she managed to smile a little brighter at the
   1.135 +brunette. She wanted to leave on a happy note. A glorious note. One
   1.136 +that would leave Sakura with good memories of her friend’s visit. So
   1.137 +she would not let her pained feelings inside get a foothold again
   1.138 +like she had the night of the kiss. No, this time she would be all
   1.139 +smiles for Sakura. She would be everything for Sakura. Because she
   1.140 +loved her. 
   1.141 +Returning Tomoyo’s smile, Sakura brushed back a lock of hair from
   1.142 +her eyes. The restaurant was gorgeous. She must have done more
   1.143 +sightseeing in her time during Tomoyo’s visit than she had during her
   1.144 +entire time prior in Hong Kong. Oh, the wonderful things she had
   1.145 +seen! It was truly a beautiful city. But the best part had been that
   1.146 +she had been able to see it with her best friend. Such things were
   1.147 +always infinitely more amazing when you could experience them with
   1.148 +someone important to you. “It was a lot of fun, Tomoyo-chan. Thank
   1.149 +you for everything." The light on Tomoyo almost made her look like a
   1.150 +part of the surreal design of the restaurant, adding to its beauty. 
   1.151 +Tomoyo looked a little surprised, something she rarely was. Shaking
   1.152 +her head, she quickly came back to the present, tilting her head to
   1.153 +the side. “You don’t have to thank me for anything, Sakura-chan. I
   1.154 +had a lovely time. I always have fun when I’m with Sakura-chan. And
   1.155 +anything is a great excuse to spend more time with you. I just like
   1.156 +to be around you.” 
   1.157 +They were words that Sakura had heard thousands of times before by
   1.158 +this very same woman, but all the same they brought an embarrassed
   1.159 +blush to the brunette’s cheeks. Most likely, she thought, because she
   1.160 +knew they were absolutely true on Tomoyo’s behalf. The tone in her
   1.161 +soft, gentle voice sent a trill through Sakura’s mind. There was so
   1.162 +much underlying it, so much that she never truly understood yet
   1.163 +always made her happy to hear. But what caught her attention was
   1.164 +something else entirely. Tomoyo’s stormy blue eyes once again looked
   1.165 +frozen, out of place with the beautiful smile on her face. It was as
   1.166 +if those shining windows had been boarded up to hide something deep
   1.167 +inside. Sakura shook her head. It must be her mind playing tricks on
   1.168 +her. Now that Tomoyo was leaving, she felt a deep well of sadness
   1.169 +inside. She didn’t want Tomoyo to leave. Her presence had made the
   1.170 +past few days some of the happiest in Sakura’s life. But knowing that
   1.171 +it was all coming to an end made it almost impossible to enjoy what
   1.172 +little time they had left together. She didn’t know what to do. The
   1.173 +Cardmistress felt so lost and alone now that Tomoyo would be going
   1.174 +back to Tomoeda. She needed Tomoyo. She needed to see her smiling
   1.175 +face, to hear her loving voice, to feel her gentle embrace, to feel
   1.176 +those soft lips... Sakura shook her head, trying to concentrate. She
   1.177 +wanted Tomoyo to stay, to know that her best friend would always be
   1.178 +there. But she had her own life back home. Like she had said, they
   1.179 +had gone down different roads now. This was merely a brief detour. 
   1.180 +The waitress finally arrived with their food, interrupting both
   1.181 +women from their thoughts. “It looks delicious, Sakura-chan.” Tomoyo
   1.182 +took a small bite of her meal before looking back to Sakura. “Oishi,”
   1.183 +she said, smiling at the brunette. Despite all of Hong Kong’s
   1.184 +elegance and beauty, Sakura still stood out amongst all of it for
   1.185 +Tomoyo. It all paled in comparison to the young Japanese bride that
   1.186 +Tomoyo was lucky enough to have the pleasure of calling her best
   1.187 +friend. Even sitting across from her with a slightly quizzical look
   1.188 +as she tasted a certain cuisine for the first time, she was utterly
   1.189 +gorgeous. Tomoyo smiled brighter as she watched Sakura take a sip of
   1.190 +her meal. “You can have some of mine if you’d like, Sakura-chan,” the
   1.191 +dark haired girl offered. 
   1.192 +Sakura smiled happily at the offer. “Arigato, Tomoyo-chan! Next time
   1.193 +I’ll be a little more careful about what I order. It sounded like a
   1.194 +good thing.” Her smile turned sheepish as she looked back at her own
   1.195 +meal before meeting gazes with Tomoyo again. To her surprise, Tomoyo
   1.196 +brought her own chopsticks up to Sakura’s mouth. The brunette blinked
   1.197 +for a second before opening her mouth. With delicate precision,
   1.198 +Tomoyo fed her the bite of food. 
   1.199 +“Sakura-chan looks so cute when she’s being fed,” Tomoyo said simply
   1.200 +as she took another bite up to Sakura’s mouth. Her eyes seemed to
   1.201 +sparkle as she watched the Cardmistress intently, earlier thoughts
   1.202 +lost in her current state of bliss that being near Sakura always
   1.203 +managed to affect her with. Sakura’s blush faded slowly as she
   1.204 +continued to eat from Tomoyo’s chopsticks. The two sat in relative
   1.205 +silence, but there wasn’t anything awkward about it. It was pleasant
   1.206 +and warm, drowning out the noise that all the other patrons were
   1.207 +making. Before long, Tomoyo had fed Sakura all of her plate. 
   1.208 +Sitting back, Sakura finally realized that she had been leaning
   1.209 +forward the entire time. No doubt for Tomoyo to feed her. She felt
   1.210 +giddy and bubbly, excited and content all at once. This was
   1.211 +wonderful, being here with Tomoyo, spending their time together this
   1.212 +way. It felt like they had never been apart. Like it had always been
   1.213 +this way, the two of them. Tomoyo had always been there for her, but
   1.214 +it felt nice to be alone with her, to be able to concentrate solely
   1.215 +on the toy designer for once. On the cute little things she did and
   1.216 +said. On the feelings that coursed through her at just being there
   1.217 +with her. It was nice to be going out to dinner with her. It was
   1.218 +almost like her dates with Syaoran. But it was so different in many
   1.219 +aspects. There wasn’t that embarrassing uneasiness that usually went
   1.220 +along with her dates or the unsteady silence as she tried to come up
   1.221 +with what to say. It just didn’t matter. She didn’t have to say
   1.222 +anything at all and it was perfectly all right. Tomoyo’s eyes seemed
   1.223 +to be able to read her perfectly. It was a wonderful sensation. And
   1.224 +after all of Tomoyo’s trip, it was difficult to think of anything to
   1.225 +say that didn’t have to do with their parting soon. So it was a
   1.226 +blessing to be able to just cherish their time together. The two
   1.227 +women chatted pleasantly about certain things, none of any great
   1.228 +significance. It was enough to know that the other was there.
   1.229 +After a brief silence, Sakura looked down, struggling to put her
   1.230 +feelings into words. Being with Tomoyo had such a tremendous affect
   1.231 +on her, as she had recently been aware of, but the flurry of emotions
   1.232 +was difficult to pin down. She knew they were of love. A strong and
   1.233 +powerful love that swept her off her feet and nearly pulled her along
   1.234 +in the cyclone of her feelings. But such a love for her best friend
   1.235 +seemed so strange, that it would be so much more encompassing than
   1.236 +even her love for her husband. It left her dizzy in its wake, unsure
   1.237 +of what to say to the beautiful lavender haired woman. The love that
   1.238 +she experienced from Tomoyo felt equally as powerful, though it
   1.239 +seemed to have much more direction than Sakura’s own confused
   1.240 +feelings. It was all encompassing yet direct at the same time, never
   1.241 +leaving her whenever Tomoyo was present. In all that the pale woman
   1.242 +did, Sakura could feel that same love that Tomoyo so delicately took
   1.243 +care of. Her body shuddered lightly at even the feel of Tomoyo’s hand
   1.244 +encompassing her own on the table, the fingers slowly entwining with
   1.245 +her own. “Tomoyo-chan,” she began, nervously. “When I’m with you,
   1.246 +I... Sometimes I feel like my heart’s pounding in my chest and I feel
   1.247 +breathless like I’ve been running for miles even though I’ve been
   1.248 +standing still. I feel like... Like there’s magic in the air, like
   1.249 +it’s in everything that you touch. I feel so happy when we’re
   1.250 +together. Sometimes I feel dizzy, like it’s too much. But then I know
   1.251 +that you’ll catch me if I fall. So I’m never afraid. Even when it
   1.252 +feels like my heart will burst from too much inside, it just seems to
   1.253 +grow and grow. I don’t know how to talk to Syaoran-chan about any of
   1.254 +this. But I guess that’s okay. I’ve heard you say things like this
   1.255 +before and I think I’m starting to understand them. Not all of it,
   1.256 +but some. I just... I’m really glad you’re here.” 
   1.257 +Tomoyo watched Sakura for a long moment, playing her words over and
   1.258 +over again in her head. Sakura almost looked like a scared puppy,
   1.259 +unsure of how Tomoyo would react. Tomoyo was still a little surprised
   1.260 +herself. The brunette’s words were so earnest, so heartfelt, that
   1.261 +Tomoyo was having difficulty writing off the feelings Sakura had
   1.262 +expressed. A soft smile crossed her lips. Bringing Sakura’s hand up,
   1.263 +she kissed it softly, delicately. “Sakura-chan, you always make me
   1.264 +feel very special. You really don’t know how much happiness you have
   1.265 +given me over the years. Hearing you say that makes me very glad for
   1.266 +the time we’ve been able to spend together. You’re very important to
   1.267 +me, Sakura-chan. Hearing what’s in your precious heart is a thrill to
   1.268 +me because I’ve always wanted to know that it was beating happily. It
   1.269 +sounds like Sakura-chan’s heart is very much like mine.”
   1.270 +“But, Tomoyo-chan, I don’t want your heart to burst from all of that
   1.271 +love locked up inside of you. Please tell me who has the key. I know
   1.272 +that your love for your special someone must be very strong. I don’t
   1.273 +know how you can handle it,” Sakura shook her head sadly, her hand
   1.274 +still holding onto Tomoyo’s as their eyes met from across the table.
   1.275 +Tomoyo just smiled, perhaps a little sadly. Slowly standing up, she
   1.276 +brought Sakura up with her. Dinner was done and there was no reason
   1.277 +to stay. “Sometimes I wonder if the key is still out there, Sakura-
   1.278 +chan. Or maybe it’s already been lost. But it doesn’t matter. The
   1.279 +feelings inside of you are happy, aren’t they, Sakura-chan? So are
   1.280 +mine. Because when I close my eyes, my special someone is smiling.
   1.281 +And it is the most beautiful, shining smile that I have ever seen.”
   1.282 +Her eyes never left Sakura as she stood close to the Cardmistress,
   1.283 +their hands held. Yes, Sakura’s smile was like the gentle touch of
   1.284 +angels. It would forever soothe her aching heart as long as she knew
   1.285 +it was there. 
   1.286 +Sakura sighed, but she quickly brightened visibly. “Would you like
   1.287 +to dance, Tomoyo-chan? I think Fanren-chan mentioned a place nearby
   1.288 +before we left. I remember you said that you liked to dance, even if
   1.289 +you haven’t in a long time. And I know you can’t with your special
   1.290 +person, but I’d still be happy to dance with you.”
   1.291 +A soft giggle came from Tomoyo as she nodded. “I would love to dance
   1.292 +with you, Sakura-chan. More than anything. I can’t think of a better
   1.293 +way to end the night.” With that, the two made their way quickly out
   1.294 +of the restaurant towards a night of dancing. 
   1.295 +
   1.296 +The two woman glided across the slightly crowded floor to
   1.297 +romantically slow music playing all around them. Tomoyo was currently
   1.298 +leading the pair as they began a new dance. Her long, lavender hair
   1.299 +swayed around her, moving along with Tomoyo’s own elegant movements.
   1.300 +The rest of the dancers hardly seemed to exist for the two friends.
   1.301 +How long they had been there remained a mystery, but it didn’t
   1.302 +matter. Acknowledging the time would be a step closer to ending the
   1.303 +night, and neither was in any hurry for that. So instead they
   1.304 +continued to dance, entangled in the almost hypnotic quality the
   1.305 +music had as it kept them dancing together. 
   1.306 +Sakura was not an accomplished dancer by any means, but she had
   1.307 +certainly enjoyed whatever chances she had to do so, whether that be
   1.308 +with Flower or with her husband. But never had she caught herself
   1.309 +enjoying it as much as she did now, Tomoyo’s fluid grace seeming to
   1.310 +pull her in further and further. Sakura was much more athletic, but
   1.311 +Tomoyo still had a certain elegance to her that always seemed to
   1.312 +shine through in such things, whether it be art or singing or even
   1.313 +editing videotape. And like everything else, Sakura found herself
   1.314 +being dragged along by Tomoyo’s sweet albeit persistent nature. She
   1.315 +gave herself up to it, letting it lead where it would. She followed
   1.316 +along as Tomoyo continued to slow dance with her, wishing that the
   1.317 +song would continue on for just one more minute. That was all she
   1.318 +wanted. Just another minute.
   1.319 +Once again Tomoyo found herself wishing she had brought her
   1.320 +camcorder along for the night’s activities. This was perfect, dancing
   1.321 +along with Sakura as the night marched inexorably forward. She had
   1.322 +ignored any semblance of a clock, much happier with the seemingly
   1.323 +eternal moment they seemed trapped in together. The feel of Sakura
   1.324 +near her would linger in her mind long after it was gone, she knew.
   1.325 +Sakura’s sweet scent, the way she felt through the soft fabric of her
   1.326 +dress, the way her eyes sparkled in the dim light while they danced,
   1.327 +it would all remain with her. But if only she could have it on
   1.328 +videotape! Even asking a complete stranger to videotape the two of
   1.329 +them sounded perfectly reasonable at the moment. Then she could watch
   1.330 +this tape of their date over and over again when she returned home.
   1.331 +Well, their almost date, anyway. But it was close enough. It
   1.332 +certainly felt more than romantic enough to the lavender haired girl
   1.333 +at any rate, who shifted to let Sakura lead as the next song began.
   1.334 +If she could have one wish, it would be to stop time here, to let
   1.335 +this moment stretch out for an eternity. She could think of no better
   1.336 +way to spend it than in Sakura’s arms, dancing happily with her.
   1.337 +Well, perhaps she could think of several others, but they would
   1.338 +require far more than a simple wish. For the time being, Tomoyo would
   1.339 +be quite content if the music would just roll on forever, allowing
   1.340 +her all of that time to be with her beloved. She enjoyed the dancing
   1.341 +immensely. It afforded her the chance to not think about anything.
   1.342 +Her thoughts were far from the forefront of her mind, leaving only
   1.343 +her feelings and Sakura to take up her full attention. There were no
   1.344 +words or questions spinning through her mind now. It was only love
   1.345 +and joy and the rhythmic moves of dancing as she and Sakura carried
   1.346 +on.
   1.347 +How long had they been dancing? Sakura had no idea anymore. Nor did
   1.348 +she care. The night had been wonderful. Dancing had been a sweet
   1.349 +icing on the cake. The Cardmistress smiled to herself as Tomoyo
   1.350 +rested her head on her shoulder, their bodies swaying lightly
   1.351 +together to the music. Bringing her hand up, Sakura’s fingers lightly
   1.352 +brushed through the silken strands, feeling them slip between her
   1.353 +fingers. Tomoyo sighed softly against her. It was a happy, contented
   1.354 +sound. Sakura’s heart swelled to hear it and she held on tighter to
   1.355 +Tomoyo, still moving lightly as the music continued playing. After a
   1.356 +brief moment’s hesitation, Sakura brushed some of the dark hair away
   1.357 +from one of Tomoyo’s ears. “Tomoyo-chan, I don’t want you to be
   1.358 +lonely. You’re so pretty, and kind, and gentle, and loving. You just
   1.359 +can’t be alone. I love you too much to see you alone.”
   1.360 +“I’m not lonely when I’m with you,” Tomoyo replied softly, snuggling
   1.361 +closer against Sakura, her head shifting on the brunette’s shoulder.
   1.362 +“When I’m with you, nothing else seems to matter. I’m just so happy
   1.363 +that I can be with Sakura-chan that everything else fades into the
   1.364 +background. I’m very pleased that you think of me so highly. Hearing
   1.365 +you say things like that makes my heart beat faster. I love you,
   1.366 +Sakura-chan,” she whispered at last, closing her eyes. Today had been
   1.367 +an emotional rollercoaster. No, the entire trip had been. But little
   1.368 +moments like this revitalized her, reminding her in a gentle voice
   1.369 +that this was exactly why she loved Sakura. 
   1.370 +	“I love you, too, Tomoyo-chan,” Sakura whispered in return, holding
   1.371 +onto Tomoyo tightly. She didn’t want to let her go. She never wanted
   1.372 +to let her go. Never again. It didn’t feel right to be without her.
   1.373 +She needed Tomoyo. This feeling, this peaceful feeling that
   1.374 +encompassed her body and soul was missing whenever Tomoyo was gone.
   1.375 +Her heart begged for the toy designer to stay, but she dared not ask
   1.376 +that of her. She couldn’t.
   1.377 +	Tomoyo giggled again, her voice softly muffled against Sakura’s
   1.378 +shoulder. Her dark hair was spilt over Sakura and herself now, her
   1.379 +body leaning against Sakura’s. ‘Oh, how I wish that were true. I
   1.380 +would give anything to know that with all certainty. I would live my
   1.381 +entire life to make you happy, Sakura-chan. I love you so much,’ she
   1.382 +thought to herself. Aloud, she said, “I still think my love and your
   1.383 +love are different things, Sakura-chan.” This time she left off the
   1.384 +offer to explain when she was older. No, there would be no
   1.385 +explanation, she had decided. It would only make things more
   1.386 +difficult for Sakura. And for herself. Her love was best kept hidden.
   1.387 +Even if it did hurt terribly sometimes. But that’s why she would
   1.388 +always treasure moments like these.
   1.389 +	“How can you be sure?” Sakura asked, her voice questioning. She
   1.390 +could remember Tomoyo saying that before, but for some reason it was
   1.391 +troubling her. Why would their love be any different? Why wouldn’t it
   1.392 +be the same? She almost felt surrounded by the feelings in her heart,
   1.393 +all of them attached like strings to the woman in her arms.
   1.394 +	“I’m not so sure sometimes,” Tomoyo whispered back quietly. Her
   1.395 +head slowly pulled off of Sakura’s shoulder, her stormy blue eyes
   1.396 +shimmering as they met Sakura’s jade orbs. Her fingers gently cupped
   1.397 +Sakura’s chin as a phantom of a smile played across her lips. Her
   1.398 +whole body ached for the feel of those lips just one more time. For
   1.399 +that passionate embrace, for the flood of emotions she had received
   1.400 +from Sakura. But her fingers slowly slipped away, falling back to her
   1.401 +side. Her head rested once again on Sakura’s shoulder. No, if she was
   1.402 +going to fade away, then that memory would be what would burn in her
   1.403 +heart forevermore. She would savor that one kiss always. She closed
   1.404 +her eyes once more and lost herself in Sakura’s warm embrace.
   1.405 +	Sakura held her gently, lovingly. She still didn’t understand what
   1.406 +the dark haired woman had meant by all that, but right now she didn’t
   1.407 +feel like asking her. She just wanted to hold her until the morning
   1.408 +came. Maybe it never would. Maybe if she held on tight enough, Tomoyo
   1.409 +would never have to leave her side again. After Tomoyo’s visit,
   1.410 +returning to life without the gentle presence of the toy designer was
   1.411 +utterly inconceivable. Sakura couldn’t imagine life without her, not
   1.412 +knowing she was right there, not being able to be with her. Now that
   1.413 +she had seen Tomoyo again, she knew what it was that had been missing
   1.414 +since she had moved to Hong Kong. Not her family or friends, although
   1.415 +she missed them dearly. But Tomoyo herself. The feelings inside her
   1.416 +that expanded in joy when they were together, that felt so cold and
   1.417 +alone when they were apart, told her this much. Even if she couldn’t
   1.418 +quite name it, she knew it to be true. 
   1.419 +	A feeling welled up in Sakura’s anxious heart that she could only
   1.420 +vaguely remember feeling quite some time ago. It was a devastating
   1.421 +mix of pain, fear, abandonment, and loss all bundled up inside of
   1.422 +her. These weren’t the feelings she’d had when Syaoran had left,
   1.423 +though she had missed him terribly. These were the feelings she could
   1.424 +only remember as if from a dream when her mother had been taken away
   1.425 +from her. She had only been three years old at the time, still a
   1.426 +young child. But the feelings were as potent as the day she had found
   1.427 +out what had happened to her mother. It tore at her heart with a
   1.428 +vicious ferocity, like some caged beast that had finally escaped.
   1.429 +Sharp claws raked at her soul as tears begin to drip down her cheeks.
   1.430 +She held onto Tomoyo tighter, her body shaking ever so slightly. Why
   1.431 +was she feeling this way? It wasn’t like Tomoyo was going away for
   1.432 +good. She would see her again. They would still write letters and
   1.433 +talk on the phone. They would still be best friends forever. But some
   1.434 +of what Tomoyo said had been haunting her, refusing to completely
   1.435 +leave. Thoughts of an aching void in her life where Tomoyo had once
   1.436 +been were teasing her mind. She didn’t want the morning to come. It
   1.437 +would come and snatch Tomoyo away from her like the talons of some
   1.438 +ancient dragon. And she would be left alone. Yes, she would have her
   1.439 +prince. But was that enough? She felt like her heart was being torn
   1.440 +asunder in her chest. Choked sobs escaped her lips as she grasped
   1.441 +desperately onto her pale friend. 
   1.442 +	A warm tear dropped down onto Tomoyo’s neck, startling her out of
   1.443 +the daze she had fallen into. Holding onto Sakura, swaying in the
   1.444 +music had brought time to a standstill. There was no tomorrow. There
   1.445 +was no yesterday. There was only now. A bright spot in her life that
   1.446 +she would forever hold dear the same as she held onto Sakura at that
   1.447 +very moment. But Sakura’s shaky sobs quickly brought her back to the
   1.448 +slightly crowded dance floor. She was instantly concerned, but part
   1.449 +of her knew the problem already. This was it. This was their
   1.450 +farewell. Sakura didn’t know it, but this was the last time they
   1.451 +would ever see each other. Sakura was a very emotional woman. Parting
   1.452 +must be hell for her. Tomoyo knew how painful it was. She couldn’t
   1.453 +bear the thought of being away from Sakura anymore than she could
   1.454 +quit breathing. She needed Sakura. All of her. She was the lifeblood
   1.455 +of Tomoyo’s life. But at the same time, she knew that she had to go.
   1.456 +Oh, she could always pack up and move to Hong Kong. Her mother
   1.457 +wouldn’t be happy about it, but it would be easy enough. She could
   1.458 +stay nearby and visit Sakura every day. But then she would be
   1.459 +dangerously close to throwing away all that she had worked for to
   1.460 +make Sakura happy. That would risk damaging her marriage to Syaoran
   1.461 +if Tomoyo got too involved and also could ruin their friendship if
   1.462 +things progressed any further than they already had. She couldn’t
   1.463 +risk Sakura’s happiness for her own selfishness. And she also knew
   1.464 +that being so close to Sakura, watching her from such a short
   1.465 +distance, her heart pounding every second for her, it would kill her.
   1.466 +Just as surely as any knife’s blade. That pain would be even worse
   1.467 +than never seeing Sakura again. At least if she left, she knew that
   1.468 +Sakura’s happiness would be safe and that she would always have her
   1.469 +memories. She could live with that. She had to. But staying would be
   1.470 +a form of exquisite torture, slowly tugging and battering the cage in
   1.471 +her heart. “Sakura-chan...” Tomoyo whispered softly, her lithe
   1.472 +fingers stroking the other woman’s back through the thin fabric of
   1.473 +her dress. Her head lifted off of Sakura’s shoulder, her eyes meeting
   1.474 +Sakura’s as she stood pressed against the Cardmistress. Gentle
   1.475 +fingers went up over Sakura’s shoulders, up her neck, and along her
   1.476 +cheeks, wiping away Sakura’s warm tears. Tomoyo’s kind, loving gaze
   1.477 +penetrated Sakura’s emerald green eyes as she continued to wipe her
   1.478 +tears away. “Please don’t cry, Sakura-chan. No matter how far apart
   1.479 +we are, I’ll always be with you. My heart will always be tied to
   1.480 +yours.”
   1.481 + The last of her strength crumbling away from her, Sakura clutched
   1.482 +onto Tomoyo, sobbing quietly against her. Her heart cried out to her,
   1.483 +those feelings returning stronger, more urgent, but she couldn’t make
   1.484 +them out. She didn’t understand. It was like her heart was speaking
   1.485 +another language. All she knew was that she didn’t want Tomoyo to go
   1.486 +away. The world would be too dark a place. Too bland. Too real.
   1.487 +Tomoyo added a dreamlike quality to life, one that always enveloped
   1.488 +Sakura. Her days would be too normal without Tomoyo’s eccentric
   1.489 +activities and her embarrassing remarks. She would be too weak
   1.490 +without Tomoyo’s constant affection and support. She had Syaoran to
   1.491 +lean on, but Tomoyo made that unnecessary. She brought up a strength
   1.492 +and courage inside Sakura that wasn’t there without her. The thought
   1.493 +of never seeing Tomoyo again, disappearing from her life as her
   1.494 +mother had so long ago again pierced the chaos inside of her. “Please
   1.495 +don’t ever leave me, Tomoyo-chan...” Sakura sobbed. 
   1.496 +Tomoyo froze at Sakura’s words, unable to do much more than hold
   1.497 +onto the grief-stricken Cardmistress. It was as if Sakura had heard
   1.498 +her thoughts from earlier that night. Words escaped Tomoyo, eluding
   1.499 +her tongue as she tried desperately to think. She had never been able
   1.500 +to lie to Sakura. It was nearly impossible to her. She could omit
   1.501 +details or hide the truth if she thought it would hurt Sakura, but
   1.502 +she could never bring herself to lie to the brunette. ‘Sakura-chan,
   1.503 +it’s for the best. I have to leave. I have to fade out of your life,’
   1.504 +she thought to herself, not daring to speak the words lest they cause
   1.505 +even more pain for either of them. Her fingers brushed away still
   1.506 +more tears that fell past Sakura’s emerald eyes before pushing away
   1.507 +some of Sakura’s hair. The lavender haired woman’s voice was soft and
   1.508 +comforting as she gazed deeply into Sakura’s tear stained eyes.
   1.509 +“Sakura-chan, please don’t cry. It makes me feel bad to see you so
   1.510 +sad. I promise that I’ll always hold you close to my heart. Wherever
   1.511 +I am and wherever you are, I’ll always see Sakura-chan when I close
   1.512 +my eyes.” Her voice dropped to a low whisper as she continued, her
   1.513 +fingers gently stroking through Sakura’s hair. Her heart ached at the
   1.514 +sight of Sakura’s tear streaked face. She wanted to take all of that
   1.515 +pain in Sakura’s eyes and take it for herself. Seeing Sakura in pain
   1.516 +hurt her infinitely worse than her own suffering. “Sakura-chan, I had
   1.517 +a wonderful time with you. Thank you so much for these golden
   1.518 +memories. I will treasure them always, even when I’m looking down on
   1.519 +the earth from above. Because nothing could be more beautiful than
   1.520 +the moments I’ve spent with you, Sakura-chan. They will always fill
   1.521 +my heart with joy when I look back on them. It’s exactly why I always
   1.522 +videotaped you. So I could always watch those captured moments of
   1.523 +you, so I could hold those little pieces close to my heart. I could
   1.524 +never leave you, Sakura-chan. Not completely. I may go back home and
   1.525 +things might get busy in your life. But my heart will always be
   1.526 +singing to you. Because I’m wrapped up in the ribbons that trail from
   1.527 +Sakura-chan’s heart.” A small smile blossomed on her lips as her
   1.528 +hands slowly stroked Sakura’s cheeks. 
   1.529 +Looking back into Tomoyo’s stormy blue eyes, Sakura could feel the
   1.530 +lightening behind them. It was warm, encompassing, and made her whole
   1.531 +being tingle. Her fear and panic began to dissipate. She was still
   1.532 +worried about Tomoyo’s trip home, but it felt so far away now. So
   1.533 +very far away. “I just want to be with you,” Sakura whispered softly,
   1.534 +hugging the nearly frail woman in her arms. 
   1.535 +“That’s all I want, too, Sakura-chan,” Tomoyo replied, her fingers
   1.536 +trailing past Sakura’s ear. She continued to gaze into Sakura’s eyes
   1.537 +lovingly, her free hand going back to rubbing the brunette’s back.
   1.538 +“You’ve given me the most wonderful moments in my life. I don’t think
   1.539 +I can ever repay you. Sakura-chan, you the most beautiful, genki,
   1.540 +sweet, and amazing person that I have ever met. I don’t think I’ll
   1.541 +ever know how I was lucky enough to meet you. It’s always been easy
   1.542 +for me to see how you could capture hearts with more ease than you
   1.543 +can capture Cards.” Her smile grew softly, her dark hair teasing
   1.544 +Sakura’s own. “You mean the world to me, Sakura-chan. No matter what
   1.545 +happens, just please be happy. Wherever life takes you, I want it to
   1.546 +be a spectacular trip for you, Sakura-chan.” Tomoyo barely managed to
   1.547 +hold up her mask as her mind retread over Sakura’s words, over how
   1.548 +scared and worried she had looked. Could she leave Sakura? Could she
   1.549 +fade out of her life? She knew she had to, for both of their sakes,
   1.550 +but could she really bring herself to? Especially when she could see
   1.551 +so clearly into those beautiful emerald jewels? A part of her told
   1.552 +her that she had been wrong, that she had been blinded by her belief
   1.553 +that she couldn’t make Sakura happy, that Sakura needed her every bit
   1.554 +as much as she needed Sakura. That thought frightened her deeply.
   1.555 +Because if it was right, then what had she done by helping to get
   1.556 +Sakura with Syaoran?
   1.557 +“But I want you to be happy, Tomoyo-chan. Why can’t we both be
   1.558 +happy?” Sakura asked, genuinely curious. She sounded much calmer now,
   1.559 +almost relaxed in their shared embrace. This whole thing was like a
   1.560 +riddle. It was stuck in her brain but she couldn’t quite make sense
   1.561 +of it. Though the answer was on the tip of her tongue. Tomoyo’s
   1.562 +special person was so lucky to have the love in Tomoyo’s bound heart.
   1.563 +But why couldn’t he just wake up and notice how much she needed him?
   1.564 +How hurt her love was making her? Sakura couldn’t understand how
   1.565 +anyone could not return Tomoyo’s love with the same impassioned
   1.566 +fervor that the dark haired woman herself was capable of. It bathed
   1.567 +Sakura in its gentle glow, sheltering her from the cold and
   1.568 +loneliness. Again the urgent howl of feelings inside her almost made
   1.569 +her jump. It was as if they were struggling to break free. But still,
   1.570 +Sakura couldn’t understand. They grew fiercer in her heart, trying
   1.571 +desperately to bubble out of the Cardmistress. Tomoyo was the focus
   1.572 +of them, she new that. Strong, heated, deep feelings that ran
   1.573 +throughout her were boiling in her heart. They were nearly screaming
   1.574 +at her. She felt like she only had one chance. But one chance for
   1.575 +what? 
   1.576 +Tomoyo smiled softly, but it didn’t reach her eyes. She held onto
   1.577 +Sakura warmly, her hand still moving from the small of Sakura’s back
   1.578 +up to her shoulder blades. “I’m happy as long as Saku...” Sakura cute
   1.579 +her off, her lips meeting Tomoyo’s in a delightful peck that took
   1.580 +Tomoyo by complete surprise. She had certainly not been expecting
   1.581 +that from the brunette. Her own feelings had become such a mystery to
   1.582 +her as of late and Sakura’s increased affection ever since her
   1.583 +arrival had made things even more difficult for her to decipher. Her
   1.584 +pale cheeks darkened as she felt the lips against her own again, this
   1.585 +time kissing longer. The young woman pulled her magical best friend
   1.586 +into a closer embrace, returning the kiss herself. It tasted sweeter
   1.587 +than anything the banquet or the restaurant had to offer. The silky
   1.588 +touch of Sakura’s lips was softer than any fabric she had ever
   1.589 +handled. It was magical, a brief moment where she got more than just
   1.590 +images or momentos of Sakura. She had a piece of her soul. 
   1.591 +Thinking back on it, Sakura couldn’t say exactly why she had kissed
   1.592 +Tomoyo. Only that she had to. That every ounce of her being had been
   1.593 +wholeheartedly for the idea and that she had merely carried through
   1.594 +with it. The single kiss she and Tomoyo had shared several nights
   1.595 +before had been the most powerful kiss Sakura had ever felt in her
   1.596 +life. Not for the way Tomoyo kissed, no. Tomoyo’s kisses were
   1.597 +delicate, like sweet butterflies, gentle and slow. But it was the way
   1.598 +it grasped onto her heart and soul and burned through her with a
   1.599 +strength that made her feel truly alive. More alive than she had ever
   1.600 +felt in her life. Right there. With Tomoyo. The kiss lengthened,
   1.601 +Tomoyo’s petal soft lips parting her own ever so slightly as it
   1.602 +continued. Sakura could do nothing but hold tightly onto the dark
   1.603 +haired woman, hoping once more that the morning would never come. Her
   1.604 +fingers found themselves at home in Tomoyo’s luxurious lavender hair,
   1.605 +brushing through the soft curls. “Tomoyo-chan...” she whispered as
   1.606 +she finally gasped for breath. Her body was nearly shuddering but not
   1.607 +from lack of air. Tomoyo’s pale cheeks had reached a beautiful
   1.608 +crimson hue that she was sure her own were probably matching at the
   1.609 +moment. “Hanyaa...”
   1.610 +A musical giggle escaped Tomoyo at that. She was still a little
   1.611 +surprised by Sakura’s sudden action, but she was glad for it. If only
   1.612 +she could save kisses in her scrapbook as easily as she could store
   1.613 +photos. But this was something she was sure her memory would never
   1.614 +forget, even if it would be nice to have videotaped the event. It got
   1.615 +rid of any doubts she may have had about Sakura’s involvement in the
   1.616 +previous kiss. This time there had been no prompting. Sakura was the
   1.617 +one who had kissed her. She felt delightedly thrilled at that. Sakura
   1.618 +had kissed her. What a wonderful way to bring her last night in Hong
   1.619 +Kong to a close. With a kiss from Sakura. Time may not be able to
   1.620 +stop on a single moment, but those moments were forever carried
   1.621 +forward as long as they were held onto by a loving heart. “Thank you
   1.622 +again for everything, Sakura-chan. I’ll never forget any of this.
   1.623 +You’ve made me happier than I ever thought I could possibly be.”
   1.624 +Smiling sweetly, she kissed Sakura’s cheek. A dreamy sigh escaped her
   1.625 +lips as she tilted her head to the side. “Sakura-chan is a such a
   1.626 +fantastic kisser. So genki.”
   1.627 +Sakura felt herself blushing at Tomoyo’s words. But it hardly seemed
   1.628 +to matter. She hugged her best friend tightly, feeling fuzzy and
   1.629 +peaceful and content again, though her frazzled thoughts still longed
   1.630 +for more, to feel those creamy lips again. She shook her head,
   1.631 +blushing darker. She had no idea why kissing Tomoyo affected her so
   1.632 +deeply, but she loved the way it felt, both during the kiss and in
   1.633 +her arms afterwards. If only... Her eyes widened after they finally
   1.634 +fell upon her watch. Just how long had they been dancing? “Tomoyo-
   1.635 +chan, we need to get home if we’re going to get you packed in time
   1.636 +for your flight and if you’re going to get any sleep.”
   1.637 +“I can always sleep on the plane, Sakura-chan,” Tomoyo said sweetly,
   1.638 +stroking Sakura’s cheek with gentle fingers. “I want to spend the
   1.639 +last of my time with you.” This was it. Her last few hours with
   1.640 +Sakura. She wanted to do anything but sleep at the moment, her heart
   1.641 +racing as she enjoyed the close proximity to her friend. All she
   1.642 +wanted was to be with Sakura for as long as she could. To be with her
   1.643 +Cardmistress until she was finally pulled away. Her eyes sparkled as
   1.644 +she watched Sakura, each gentle caress whispering her love to the
   1.645 +brunette. 
   1.646 +Sakura hugged Tomoyo tightly and nodded. Sleep seemed to be the
   1.647 +furthest thing from her mind as well. She had finally gotten Tomoyo
   1.648 +up to Hong Kong and she wanted to hold onto her forever. “Would you
   1.649 +like to dance again?” Sakura asked curiously.
   1.650 +“With all my heart, Sakura-chan,” Tomoyo whispered in reply, her
   1.651 +eyes never leaving Sakura’s. There was only now. And in this now,
   1.652 +there was only herself and Sakura. Tomorrow could wait.
   1.653 +