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1 Dear Sakura: Broken Dreams
2 by Amazoness Duo and G.P.
3 amazonessduo@hotmail.com
4 pearsong1954@yahoo.com
5
6
7
8 It wasn’t supposed to be this way. Tomoyo’s carefully constructed
9 plans had all collapsed in such a short time. The wreckage of her
10 hopes and dreams, of her well planned efforts for Sakura, had her
11 lonely heart pinned helplessly to the floor. She was lost and afraid,
12 alone in an endless maze of despair that she had no hope of escaping.
13 Sakura’s beautiful new life was on the verge of ending tragically
14 because of Tomoyo’s recent trip to Hong Kong. She had given into her
15 feelings for Sakura and now the woman she loved was about to lose
16 everything because of it. Her plan to leave Sakura’s life quietly, to
17 fade away from Sakura over time had also been dashed by the
18 Cardmistress’s sudden appearance in Tomoeda. Everything Tomoyo had
19 done, she had done for Sakura. But it had all been for nothing, her
20 effort and prayers amounting to little more than broken dreams.
21 Despite how hard she had tried, how much she had given, it hadn’t
22 been enough. She hadn’t been able to safeguard Sakura’s beautiful
23 life that she herself had played a part in orchestrating. After all,
24 had she not played such an integral part in getting Sakura with her
25 prince, Syaoran, would they have come together on their own? But now
26 it all teetered on the brink, threatening to crush both Tomoyo and
27 Sakura underneath its weight.
28 All the dark haired heiress had ever wanted with all of her heart
29 had been Sakura’s happiness. Everything she had done had been for
30 those ends. From pushing Syaoran to tell Sakura his feelings and
31 later helping Sakura understand her feelings for the Chinese boy.
32 Fading out of Sakura’s life had been just another part of her plan
33 for Sakura’s happiness. To leave so that she couldn’t threaten the
34 wonderful life Sakura was leading with her beloved. But Fate had
35 cruelly stepped in right when things seemed to be perfect. Tomoyo had
36 finally crafted the beautiful life she had always envisioned for
37 Sakura. The woman she loved was happily married and protected and
38 would one day have a gorgeous child. It had all been set up. All
39 Tomoyo had to do was to slip away from Sakura’s life and hope that it
40 would always be joyous for the Mistress of the Cards. Tomoyo had
41 tried so hard, but it seemed that her hard work had never mattered at
42 all. Her remaining presence in Sakura’s life had possibly damaged it
43 beyond repair, had left Sakura’s shimmering future in doubt. The
44 lavender haired girl hadn’t even been able to escape before the
45 damage became too great, Sakura reaching Japan before she could
46 disappear forever.
47 “All I want is for the person I like to be happy. If they can be
48 happy, then that would be my greatest wish,” Tomoyo whispered to
49 herself, as if she were once again repeating to Sakura her reasoning
50 for not going after the one she loved. But now the words sounded
51 empty, hollow. If she didn’t have the knowledge that Sakura was
52 happy, then what did she have? The heart of her beloved Mistress of
53 the Cards couldn’t possibly survive the death of her happy life,
54 could it? So Tomoyo was left with nothing at all, not even the hope
55 for her friend’s future. Her lonely heart was stripped of even that,
56 the one thing that had made her life worth living, that had given her
57 empty life some substance. The heiress had gambled and lost. She had
58 placed her bets and now was the time that debts must be paid. Her
59 gamble for Sakura’s happiness had fallen through. So in a way, it was
60 her own fault that the brunette was on the brink of losing her new
61 and wonderful life in Hong Kong. She had been one of the driving
62 forces behind Sakura’s marriage to Syaoran, to her moving to Hong
63 Kong. And ironically, she had been the one to bring it so close to
64 ruin.
65 Bare feet shifted on cold metal as a pale ghost of a woman looked
66 out into the cold night sky. Above lay the sparkling stars in the sky
67 while below lay the shining lights of the many buildings that
68 stretched out endlessly into the dark horizon. Wet tears dripped down
69 her chin, falling past her feet, tiny diamonds dropping from up above
70 like rain drops. She couldn’t help but wonder if she had never gone
71 to Hong Kong if this whole thing could have been avoided. Maybe she
72 could have slipped from Sakura’s life without hurting her darling
73 brunette. Maybe the beautiful life that lay before Sakura could have
74 been saved. Not that it mattered what might have been. That possible
75 future now lay in ruins and the future awaiting Sakura and Tomoyo
76 looked to be a dark and stormy one indeed. Involuntarily, the dark
77 haired girl’s mind went back to her cherished kiss with Sakura. What
78 had been a secret dream she had held dear from the time she had been
79 a child now seemed like the beginning of the end. What had begun as a
80 farewell trip with her friend had become something much more. Tomoyo
81 had intended to try and distance herself from Sakura so it would be
82 easier to part from her life, but the brunette hadn’t allowed it.
83 They had instead been closer, more intimate than they ever had in the
84 days when Sakura had been back in Tomoeda. This had, for once, taken
85 Tomoyo by complete surprise. So off guard had she been that she had
86 made the mistake of giving into the love that her heart was always
87 drowning in, kissing Sakura that one night in the garden. It had been
88 one of her fondest wishes come true, to hold Sakura close and to be
89 able to kiss her friend with all the fire that burnt in her heart.
90 And the night had felt so magical, so dreamlike. It had been her one
91 chance to give her heart to Sakura. But now it seemed that it had
92 condemned the two, slowly but surely destroying everything Tomoyo had
93 worked so hard for. But even then, Tomoyo couldn’t fully blame the
94 sweet kiss they had shared, the tender moment locked deep within her
95 heart.
96 Wind whipped long lavender hair around almost violently in the dark
97 night. Tears sparkled dimly as they fell past the dark locks of hair.
98 Tomoyo felt trapped, boxed in, trapped as surely as any of Sakura’s
99 Cards had been. She was crushed by the enormous weight of the mistake
100 she had made. Stealing Sakura’s kiss held with it a high sentence. It
101 held with it the power to destroy both Sakura’s life and her own. And
102 the pale heiress couldn’t live with the thought of her dream,
103 Sakura’s happiness being obliterated because of her giving in to her
104 heart. It hardly seemed fair that such a small thing had caused so
105 much damage. Why should Sakura suffer because of Tomoyo’s longing? A
106 long time ago, Tomoyo had thought that she could just be happy as
107 long as Sakura was. Now she realized that wasn’t true. She wanted
108 desperately for Sakura to be happy, but it left her so lonely and
109 cold inside. That realization had come with a terrible price. Giving
110 into that pain, giving into her loneliness had brought about an end
111 to the happy life she had always wanted for Sakura. It reminded the
112 lavender haired phantom of an ancient myth she had once heard long
113 ago. It was of a man who fought his way to Hades to bring back the
114 woman he loved. He had come with such bravery, such courage that he
115 had been allowed to take her back on one condition, that she follow
116 behind him and that he couldn’t look back to her until they reached
117 the surface. And so the pair traveled all the way back to the surface
118 together like that, the woman right behind him. So happy was he to
119 see the light, to finally have the woman he loved back, the man
120 turned to see her. But to his horror, she had not fully gotten to the
121 surface. In moments, she was returned the Hades. The man, distraught
122 by his lover being torn from him after nearly having her back, was
123 left alone and tormented. He killed himself shortly thereafter.
124 Sakura had been terrified by the dark tale, but Tomoyo had found it a
125 sad example of the pain love could cause. Now she saw herself in the
126 same situation. She had led Sakura to her happy life, had finally
127 left her with the happiness she always wanted for Sakura. But having
128 been so close to leaving Sakura with this happiness, Tomoyo had
129 allowed herself to look back, to give in to her feelings. And in that
130 brief moment, she had ruined it all. Sakura’s happiness was being
131 stripped from her, right in front of Tomoyo’s eyes.
132 But did Sakura have to suffer for Tomoyo’s mistake? No, the heiress
133 had decided. She had come to the conclusion that the only way to save
134 Sakura’s happiness was to leave her life, to disappear from the
135 brunette’s thoughts. But before she could fade from the only one she
136 could ever love, Sakura had rushed to Japan to stop her. Now Tomoyo
137 was trapped, unable to do anything to stave off the ruin that awaited
138 them. Her careful plans lay useless at her feet, leaving her with
139 nothing. Or did it? She had wanted to fade from Sakura’s life
140 quietly, to slip away in the least painful way possible. Now that
141 wasn’t an option with Sakura here in Japan for her. But that didn’t
142 mean that she couldn’t still save the brunette’s happy life. Tomoyo
143 knew that she herself was the catastrophe facing Sakura. If she
144 remained, the Mistress of the Cards could lose everything. Her
145 husband, the baby that Syaoran could grant her, the life and family
146 in Hong Kong that she now had. Tomoyo had sacrificed so much for
147 Sakura’s happiness, ignoring the pain and loneliness in her own heart
148 as long as Sakura’s genki heart was fulfilled. The thought that she
149 was what could ruin that horrified her. It was such a sickening
150 twist. Staying could only hurt Sakura, bringing an end to her life in
151 Hong Kong. So Tomoyo would have to leave it, to escape before she
152 could cause anymore damage. Maybe Sakura could still keep her happy
153 life, could still hold onto it if Tomoyo wasn’t there to confuse her.
154 It pained Tomoyo that she couldn’t leave quietly, slipping away into
155 the night like she had planned. Sakura would undoubtedly find out
156 about her suicide, especially with her in Japan. But Tomoyo saw no
157 other options open to her. In order for Sakura to live, she had to
158 die. Her own life held nothing but pain in her future if her
159 beautiful Cardmistress were to lose everything. And she wouldn’t let
160 Sakura be punished for Tomoyo’s own innocent sin. This was her only
161 way to escape Sakura’s life and save her friend’s happiness. Sakura
162 allowed her no other options. The auburn haired girl wouldn’t let her
163 go otherwise. If the heiress was dead then Sakura wouldn’t be so
164 confused about the feelings in her heart, seeking solace in her
165 husband. Eventually her memories of the lavender haired girl would
166 fade away, leaving her with nothing more than a faint remembrance of
167 her guardian angel from long ago. And she would grow happy and old
168 with her husband and as many children as Fate would bless them with.
169 Away from the pain, safe from the loneliness, Tomoyo prayed that she
170 would be able to watch Sakura from up above, to see the happy life
171 that her death would ensure. It was a high price, one that had to be
172 paid in blood. But it was one that the lavender eyed woman would
173 gladly pay if it meant she could stop the catastrophe awaiting her
174 dearest Sakura.
175 Clutching the teddy bear Sakura had made for her against her chest,
176 Tomoyo gazed into the darkness, the dim lights blurring into streaks
177 through her tear filled vision. Her numb, slender fingers grasped
178 onto a slightly bloodied picture of Sakura. It had been the same
179 picture that her picture frame had held before she had smashed the
180 frame to jagged shards. Her beautiful Sakura smiled happily, frozen
181 forever in that simple image. She had fled her house with only these
182 two possessions in the early hours of the morning. Sakura’s sudden
183 appearance had struck her like the blade of a knife, wedged deep into
184 her heart. It had shattered everything. Curled up in the darkness,
185 Tomoyo had cried for hours while holding onto the teddy bear she had
186 named Sakura. The pale woman had thought desperately of a way to fix
187 things, but nothing but despair had managed to penetrate her troubled
188 mind. So she had ran. Just as she had planned on doing before with
189 her planned out escape from Sakura’s life, she had run. She hadn’t
190 known at first where she was running to, how she would escape the
191 Mistress of the Cards, but she had finally found herself here. It
192 seemed fitting, to end up where some of Sakura’s most important
193 moments had been. If anyone had noticed the distraught barefoot girl,
194 they hadn’t said anything. How she had made her way to Tokyo Tower,
195 even Tomoyo wasn’t exactly sure. But she stood there nonetheless,
196 soft bare feet dirty and bloody from all of her walking. Her
197 nightgown fluttered in the increasing wind, her dark hair seeming
198 alive as it moved about her.
199 “Sakura-chan wouldn’t even recognize me, would she?” Tomoyo
200 whispered softly into the teddy bear’s ear. She held it gently,
201 lovingly, her tears rolling onto the soft cloth of its head. This
202 gift from Sakura was all she had left, the only thing she could hold
203 onto. It was her only companion at the end of her long and painful
204 road. There was some measure of relief in that, in knowing that it
205 was almost over. The cold, tangible pain inside of her was
206 unbearable. It cut through her viciously, tearing at her weak and
207 fragile soul. Her heart was pierced deeply, her love for Sakura
208 making the pain only more acute. She had to wonder if Sakura would
209 recognize this wretched, lonely girl about to throw herself off of
210 Tokyo Tower. Sakura had always seen what Tomoyo had portrayed for
211 her. In all the years they had known each other, Tomoyo had tried to
212 never show Sakura her fears, her pain, or her tears. And certainly
213 not her loneliness. She had always been happy for Sakura, always
214 offering her a smile. Sakura didn’t know what lay beneath that
215 smiling exterior. The Cardmistress hadn’t been allowed to see beneath
216 Tomoyo’s masks. Tomoyo had worn them for her, had always smiled for
217 Sakura’s sake. She had never wanted to burden Sakura with her
218 problems, with her own pain and tears. Only the briefest of glimpses
219 had been given to Sakura of the inner turmoil that lay beneath her
220 happy façade. But that had been part of the problem. Discovering
221 Tomoyo’s loneliness that night in the garden when they had shared a
222 kiss had sparked Sakura’s indomitable determination, forcing the
223 energetic brunette to try and find out who Tomoyo loved and to fix
224 the pain she had seen. Tomoyo had burdened Sakura after all in a way
225 she had never wished to. And she hated herself for that, for allowing
226 herself to let Sakura see her that way. It had been one of the
227 deciding factors in what had begun to ruin Sakura’s life. So she had
228 tried to hold onto her masks for as long as she could, to hide the
229 shadows from Sakura. She had been doing that since she had been a
230 child, always keeping up a mask of happiness for Sakura, never
231 letting her see the cold, lonely child beneath their constraints. But
232 now she was entirely without her masks, having left the broken shards
233 behind. She felt naked, unable to hold back the grief that held her
234 heart in a viselike grip. They had finally broken, and with them, so
235 had the girl underneath. Tomoyo had only been able to handle so much
236 before her soul began to splinter just like the glass in the picture
237 frame. She had tried to write Sakura a goodbye note on the back of
238 the picture she held, to try not to worry her with her death, but it
239 was impossible for her. Her masks were entirely gone. She couldn’t
240 hide her pain any longer. Sobbing in frustration, Tomoyo had finally
241 given up, leaving only a half written apology on the back of the
242 picture of Sakura.
243 Hugging the teddy bear in her arms as tightly as she could against
244 her trembling skin, Tomoyo sobbed against the bear named Sakura’s
245 head, her hair draped over the two of them as the wind grew eerily
246 calm for a moment. “I’ll miss you, Sakura-chan. Please take care of
247 her for me. I want... I need Sakura-chan to be happy. So I have to go
248 away for that. I need to fade away from her life. I don’t want to
249 hurt her like this. I wanted to move away before I did this so it
250 wouldn’t hurt Sakura-chan or mother. But there’s nothing else I can
251 do. I need to do this for Sakura-chan. It’s my last chance to save
252 her happiness,” she whispered quietly, tears soaking into the bear’s
253 head. Gingerly kissing the top of the teddy bear’s head, Tomoyo set
254 it down gently near the edge. The small bear seemed to be looking out
255 at the city spreading out below them, its tiny ribbon flowing in the
256 returning breeze.
257 “I love you, Sakura-chan,” Tomoyo said louder as she stood up. Her
258 pale skin glimmered softly in the moonlight, her lavender hair
259 falling about her like tendrils of the night itself. Clasping her
260 hands together in front of her, the pale woman looked like a grieving
261 angel. She had stood by in Sakura’s life for years, always content
262 with loving her friend from afar. She had done so not because she had
263 been embarrassed to say anything and not because she wasn’t brave
264 enough to tell the brunette. No, it had been something much deeper
265 than that. She had done it precisely because she loved Sakura. She
266 had watched her grow closer to Syaoran, had watched the one she loved
267 with all of her heart giving her heart to another. Tomoyo hadn’t
268 burdened Sakura with her own feelings, had instead tried to nurture
269 Sakura’s heart towards another. Because she believed that the
270 Mistress of the Cards, her sweet auburn haired best friend, had
271 chosen her princess long ago. Just like in the play they had done so
272 long ago, Sakura was the noble and determined prince. Syaoran was her
273 princess. And Tomoyo wouldn’t, couldn’t fight that. She had no wish
274 to. As long as Sakura could be happy, that was all that mattered. So
275 she had stayed in the background, watching as Sakura had fallen in
276 love with a little push from herself, had watched as the two had
277 begun a relationship. When you love someone so much it hurts, that
278 they become your entire world, then it becomes their happiness, not
279 your own, that matters. Maybe she could have had Sakura with the
280 amount of control she could wield over the brunette. But it would
281 never be worth having Sakura if she wasn’t happy. So if someone else
282 could have Sakura’s love, could thrill her and fill her with joy at
283 the world, then that would be Tomoyo’s goal in life. And so even if
284 it hurt, Tomoyo had given her all to make sure that Sakura would be
285 happy with Syaoran. And she would safeguard that now. Forever.
286 Alone. In one way or another, Tomoyo had always been alone. Sakura
287 had never really seen her, never looked past her masks. They had
288 always been close, but Sakura had never looked through to the girl
289 beneath her cheerful exterior. And besides Sakura, Tomoyo really
290 hadn’t had any other friends. Chiharu, Naoko, and Rika had all been
291 Sakura’s friends. Friends by the common association with Sakura
292 maybe, but nothing more. It had been so easy for Sakura to make
293 friends with her warm and loving nature. But it had always been
294 something difficult for the more introverted heiress. Sakura had been
295 her first real and best friend. And she had cherished that deeply.
296 But it left her so alone because of how in love she had fallen with
297 Sakura. Because she could never show her everything that lay in her
298 heart. And though her mother cared about her deeply, the
299 businesswoman had always been so busy with work. Tomoyo had always
300 loved the times they could spend together, but they had been few and
301 far between at times. But now that loneliness would finally come to
302 an end. She could slip away. She had always been in the background,
303 so no one should notice after a while that she was even gone. It was
304 finally over.
305 Taking a step forward, Tomoyo looked up at the stars above. She
306 wondered where Nadeshiko was up above. The beautiful woman was almost
307 certainly an angel now. She would have to ask her to keep an eye on
308 her mother. Maybe she could be Sakura’s angel. She had always wanted
309 nothing more than to watch her beautiful best friend smile joyously.
310 If she could keep an eye on Sakura after her death, she could watch
311 all that she would be missing in life. To see Sakura live her happy
312 life, to see her have children and grow old with the one she loved,
313 that would be all she could hope for. If she could be Sakura’s angel,
314 she could always be with her. And Sakura could finally be happy.
315 There would be no more danger of her ruining her dearest
316 Cardmistress’s gorgeous life. Death held no fear for the lavender
317 haired woman. It held release in it’s grasp, and salvation for the
318 happiness she wished to protect. She could finally escape her
319 loneliness and torment, leaving them as well as her masks behind.
320 Dark tresses waved in front of Tomoyo, nearly blinding the quiet
321 phantom as the wind began to pick up violently again. Tomoyo took no
322 notice of the gale, her hands held tightly to her chest. Her battered
323 heart whispered it’s endless love to Sakura amidst the rustling of
324 the wind. “Goodbye, Sakura-chan,” Tomoyo said softly, taking a last
325 glance at the steadfast teddy bear. It was time to go. But her love
326 would never leave her. Eternity awaited, calling to her. Turning back
327 to the city lights that continued to shine like beacons in the
328 darkness, Tomoyo stepped forward onto the edge of the structure. The
329 wind threatened to throw off the small toy designer, angrily shaking
330 her with all its might. But the girl waited patiently, tears still
331 dripping below. Pulling up her bloodstained picture, Tomoyo’s fingers
332 gently traced over the smiling Sakura. Behind her tears, Tomoyo
333 returned the smile to her beloved. In an instant, the picture
334 disappeared. The lavender haired woman’s heart skipped a beat as her
335 tear streaked eyes darted for the small object. It floated a few feet
336 away from her, fluttering in the heavy wind. “Sakura-chan!” Tomoyo
337 called out, reaching out for the picture, her frozen moment of
338 Sakura. Tired, bare feet pushed against metal as she grasped for the
339 metal. And with that, the world gave away beneath her. The pale woman
340 plummeted from Tokyo Tower, falling for what felt like an eternity,
341 but seeming like nothing more than precious seconds. Releasing a weak
342 sob, Tomoyo clutched her hands to her chest. Dark hair streaked
343 behind her as the angel took flight, diving to the world below. Her
344 soul had been broken a short time ago. Now her body would join it,
345 broken on the pavement below. It would finally be over. Her eyes
346 closing, her mind shifted through countless images of her beloved.
347 She was going to die, but her thoughts went immediately to the woman
348 she loved. ‘Please don’t cry, Sakura-chan. It makes me sad to see you
349 cry,’ she begged the brunette as the pavement rushed up at her like a
350 bullet train.
351 A cry reached Tomoyo’s ears, but it was indistinguishable over the
352 howl of the wind. It roared like an angry beast, fighting merely to
353 prove it’s existence. Her eyes closing tightly, Tomoyo saw Sakura’s
354 cute face smiling softly at her. “Sakura, I love you,” Tomoyo
355 whispered seconds before plowing into the concrete below.
356 “TOMOYO-CHAN!!!” Sakura screamed as she alighted next to her
357 friend’s lifeless body. Her wings disappeared in a storm of feathers
358 as she collapsed next to the broken and bloody body of the gentle
359 heiress. Horrified, Sakura reached out with shaky fingers, turning
360 Tomoyo over. The sight immediately made her wish she hadn’t. Tomoyo
361 had always been the most gorgeous woman Sakura had ever known, her
362 graceful beauty always touching Sakura’s heart. But now she lay
363 broken, shattered. Her best friend was gone, and what was left behind
364 was a painful reminder. With shaking hands, Sakura brushed back
365 fluttering lavender hair from Tomoyo’s face. Stormy blue eyes looked
366 at her lifelessly, their sparkle completely vanished. Tears burst
367 forth from Sakura as she shook her head violently. “No!! Please,
368 no..” Tears spilt down her cheeks, dripping to the broken woman
369 beneath her. She had been too late. She had been flying the entire
370 day, searching in a frenzy to find Tomoyo, her mind single mindedly
371 set on finding her best friend. It had taken her forever to finally
372 find her, and it had only been at the last possible moment when she
373 had seen Tomoyo’s body tumbling through the air. She had lost. She
374 hadn’t been fast enough. Bitter sobs wracked her body as she held
375 onto what was left of Tomoyo. Bloody lavender hair pressed against
376 her face as she continued to cry. The pale woman’s words echoed
377 through her mind like an accusation. ‘I wasn’t afraid because I knew
378 Sakura-chan would save me.’ Yet for all of that faith, Sakura had
379 failed once again to save her best friend. Had, in fact, failed for
380 the last time. “Tomoyo-chan..” Sakura cried weakly into Tomoyo’s
381 hair. “I love you.. Please don’t leave me alone..” Just like always,
382 she had been too late, and Tomoyo had paid the price. Too late...
383 Sakura blinked back a fresh surge of tears as she weakly got to her
384 feet. No, not too late. She couldn’t be. She wouldn’t let herself be.
385 “I’ll save you, Tomoyo-chan. Just like you always said I would. I
386 promise,” Sakura whispered as she numbly pulled out her staff. She
387 had once chance. She was too exhausted to use much more of her power.
388 So she would have only one chance at this. The staff twirled in her
389 hands as she tossed a Sakura Card into the air. “Return!! Bring me to
390 before Tomoyo-chan fell!” She cried out above the bestial howl of the
391 wind. She wouldn’t let this be the end.
392
393
394 Dark tresses waved in front of Tomoyo, nearly blinding the quiet
395 phantom as the wind began to pick up violently again. Tomoyo took no
396 notice of the gale, her hands held tightly to her chest. Her battered
397 heart whispered it’s endless love to Sakura amidst the rustling of
398 the wind. “Goodbye, Sakura-chan,” Tomoyo said softly, taking a last
399 glance at the steadfast teddy bear. It was time to go. But her love
400 would never leave her. Eternity awaited, calling to her. Turning back
401 to the city lights that continued to shine like beacons in the
402 darkness, Tomoyo stepped forward onto the edge of the structure. The
403 wind threatened to throw off the small toy designer, angrily shaking
404 her with all its might. But the girl waited patiently, tears still
405 dripping below. Pulling up her bloodstained picture, Tomoyo’s fingers
406 gently traced over the smiling Sakura. Behind her tears, Tomoyo
407 returned the smile to her beloved. In an instant, the picture
408 disappeared. The lavender haired woman’s heart skipped a beat as her
409 tear streaked eyes darted for the small object. It floated a few feet
410 away from her, fluttering in the heavy wind. “Sakura-chan!” Tomoyo
411 called out, reaching out for the picture, her frozen moment of
412 Sakura. Tired, bare feet pushed against metal as she grasped for the
413 metal. And with that, the world gave away beneath her. The pale woman
414 plummeted from Tokyo Tower, falling for what felt like an eternity,
415 but seeming like nothing more than precious seconds. Releasing a weak
416 sob, Tomoyo clutched her hands to her chest. Dark hair streaked
417 behind her as the angel took flight, diving to the world below. Her
418 soul had been broken a short time ago. Now her body would join it,
419 broken on the pavement below. It would finally be over. Her eyes
420 closing, her mind shifted through countless images of her beloved.
421 She was going to die, but her thoughts went immediately to the woman
422 she loved. ‘Please don’t cry, Sakura-chan. It makes me sad to see you
423 cry,’ she begged the brunette as the pavement rushed up at her like a
424 bullet train.
425 A scream hit her ears, taking her by surprise. Dark lashes fluttered
426 open, sending diamond tears into the wind. It took her a moment to
427 see the source, a small angel rushing up towards her, shimmering
428 wings beating rapidly behind her. The angel’s beauty left Tomoyo
429 breathless as the distance between then dropped away. The lavender
430 haired woman idly wondered if the angel was Nadeshiko, coming to meet
431 her. It was hard to make out the winged woman in the darkness. Still
432 stunned by the ethereal beauty that darted her way, Tomoyo let out a
433 final prayer. ‘Please let me be Sakura’s angel,’ she pleaded.
434 But Tomoyo’s wish lay incomplete, the air knocked out of her as she
435 stopped short of the ground below. The angel held onto the lavender
436 haired woman tightly, her grasp actually bruising the pale flesh
437 beneath her nightgown. Wings beat heavily as they tried to stop the
438 pair’s downward momentum. Struggling desperately, Sakura slowly began
439 to slow their descent. Her eyes closed tightly as she tried to focus
440 on nothing but the task at hand. With Tomoyo in her arms, she found
441 that extremely difficult, especially with the nature of how she had
442 found the woman. But somehow everything managed to fade away. There
443 was nothing but the moment, the action at hand. Emerald eyes opening,
444 Sakura looked forward, pouring out everything she had in one last
445 ditch effort. Wind whipped at her, pounding into the two woman,
446 weakening Sakura’s wings as they struggled to stay aloft. Her heart
447 pounding thunderously against the pale woman in her arms, Sakura felt
448 her wings falter briefly as she tried to push forward. Sweat burned
449 at her eyes as fatigue slowly sapped at her body. Panic began to
450 overwhelm her, but she forced it away with all of her might. She
451 could see a bright light ahead of her, awaiting them. It was
452 gorgeous, deep and illuminating. She struggled to reach the light,
453 forcing herself forward despite the pain that gnawed at her weakening
454 body. She thought she saw someone in the light, a woman with long,
455 dark hair and angel wings. ‘Tomoyo?’ Sakura thought weakly to
456 herself. But that couldn’t be. Tomoyo was still in her arms. Sakura’s
457 eyes widened after a moment. ‘Mama?’ The woman watched her intently
458 as Sakura desperately fought to reach the light and the ledge of the
459 Tower. She could see the teddy bear she had given Tomoyo resting on
460 the ledge, watching out along with her mother. Almost... Sakura
461 strained the last of her strength into a final push to reach the
462 ledge. The world pushed away beneath them as she flew upwards. One
463 hand shot out, reaching for the metal. It slowly edged closer. Her
464 fingers brushed the cold, but blessed metal of the Tower. With some
465 sort of handhold, she could force her tired wings to get them the
466 rest of the way up. Her fingers grappled for a better handhold. To
467 Sakura’s horror, the tower seemed to pull away from her questing
468 fingers. A sudden gust of wind had caught her wings and forced her
469 away from the tower. With no strength left, the two woman plummeted
470 once more.
471 Air buffeted a fatigued and despondent Sakura as she clutched
472 desperately onto Tomoyo. It wasn’t fair. She almost had it. She had
473 almost saved Tomoyo. Just like Tomoyo had said long ago, that Sakura
474 would always come and save her. She had almost been able to. But just
475 like always, Sakura had failed her. And so she paid for that failure
476 with her life as well as Tomoyo’s. Her arms clenched onto the cold,
477 pale woman, tears sparkling in her eyes. She had thought that she
478 could save her this time. But at least, she thought, she could be
479 with Tomoyo this time. She wouldn’t die by herself. They would go
480 together, in each other’s arms. But even with that, Sakura couldn’t
481 help but feel defeat grip her soul. She had promised she would save
482 her, had wanted to come and save her best friend once and for all.
483 She couldn’t fail. It wasn’t right. She had finally come to save
484 Tomoyo from her pain and loneliness, had finally understood that
485 their hearts were entwined with red ribbons. But she hadn’t been able
486 to offer up her heart to the gorgeous dark haired woman, hadn’t been
487 able to make up for the years of neglecting just how important Tomoyo
488 was to her. Tears fell scattered to the stormy wind as they both
489 dropped. “Tomoyo-chan..” Sakura called out as she clung to the dark
490 haired woman. No, things couldn’t end this way. Not when she finally
491 understood her heart. Not when she finally understood who she loved.
492 She couldn’t let her terrible mistake from years before end like
493 this. She had caused Tomoyo such pain through her confusion about her
494 own feelings and her marriage to Syaoran. But she had vowed to make
495 that up to her, to love Tomoyo with all of her heart, to heal her
496 lonely heart. She had to offer her heart to the dark haired woman, to
497 finally truly save her.
498 Tomoyo’s heart had nearly stopped in her chest. Sakura was here?
499 Sakura had found her? No, that wasn’t how it was supposed to be.. She
500 was supposed to die, to free Sakura from the burdens that lay over
501 her. Tears sparkled in her eyes as she stayed in the brunette’s arms.
502 Sakura wouldn’t let her leave. She wouldn’t let her escape. No matter
503 how hard she tried, everything kept moving towards the inevitable
504 destruction of Sakura’s happy life. Tomoyo hadn’t even been allowed
505 to kill herself, to end the pain and to save Sakura. What was she to
506 do now? How could she hope to fix things now? Despair flooded through
507 her in a wave, her sobs shaking her against the auburn haired woman.
508 If Sakura saved her, then she would be trapped here to see the loss
509 of Sakura’s happiness and to deal with her own pain. But if Sakura
510 didn’t save her, they would both die. That wasn’t what she wanted at
511 all. She was supposed to be the one who died, not Sakura. The
512 Mistress of the Cards had so much awaiting her. She couldn’t die now.
513 Feeling the dark haired woman shuddering in her arms, Sakura felt
514 her own heart twinge in pain. This woman, the best friend she had
515 ever had, her support when things were too much for her, her bravery
516 when she had couldn’t force up any, her mother when she had none, her
517 confidante when she had secrets that no one else could here. Tomoyo
518 had always been everything for her. The pale woman had given her
519 everything she could ever ask for, never thinking at all that Sakura
520 should ever repay her for the love and support that she had always
521 poured out to Sakura so constantly. Sakura had to make up for that.
522 She had to finally make amends for what she had done. And more
523 importantly, she had to let her heart go free. “Windy!! Please stop
524 our fall!!” She called out, her staff hitting into the Sakura Card.
525 Her power was still weak after using the Return Card and having used
526 Fly all day long so she didn’t know if it would be strong enough to
527 carry them to the ground.
528 Flying through the air, the magical woman that was Windy shifted
529 past Sakura and Tomoyo, slowing the fall against the strong gale that
530 fought back against her. The two tumbled through the air, reaching
531 ever nearer to the ground. Windy struggled against the wind as the
532 two fell together, exerting what power she could. Their descent
533 slowed, but they continued to fall.
534 Sakura felt the ground rushing up to meet her and shifted under
535 Tomoyo. The two hit the ground hard, the wind sliding them along
536 across it for a second. Pain burst through Sakura’s shoulder and
537 lower back in a dazzling display of fire and ice. Flame burned at her
538 weary muscles as she lay under her best friend, panting heavily. It
539 took her a moment to realize that she had succeeded. She had saved
540 Tomoyo after all. Well, not necessarily. But they were both alive, so
541 it was a start. Taking a deep breath, she released it into Tomoyo’s
542 hair. Burying herself against the lavender haired woman, Sakura felt
543 hot tears fall down her cheeks, sliding down Tomoyo’s neck. “Oh,
544 Tomoyo-chan!! I thought I was going to lose you...” she cried out.
545 After her failure before, it seemed a miracle that she was here with
546 her friend. It was almost as if Tomoyo had been brought back to life.
547 The fact that she was sitting there, holding onto Tomoyo beneath the
548 Tokyo Tower just as she had been before when Tomoyo had died hit her
549 with a startling suddenness, bringing fresh tears spilling down her
550 face as she cried against the pale woman.
551 Tomoyo shifted in Sakura’s embrace, holding onto the sobbing woman.
552 Her own cold tears fell bitterly to the floor below. Escape had been
553 snatched from right in front of her. There was no way she could kill
554 herself now. It would hurt Sakura too much, especially after that.
555 But she felt profound despair eating away at her. She had failed and
556 now Sakura’s happy life would come collapsing around the both of
557 them. And there was absolutely nothing she could do but drown in her
558 own sorrow. “Sakura-chan..” Tomoyo whispered, her soft voice
559 cracking. “Please don’t cry..”
560 Shaking her head as she sat back to look at Tomoyo, Sakura wiped at
561 her tearful emerald eyes with the backs of her hands. “Oh, Tomoyo-
562 chan.. I thought... I thought..” A shuddering breath escaped the
563 brunette as she looked long and hard at the dark haired woman in
564 front of her. Tomoyo looked beyond despair. Her stormy blue eyes were
565 bloodshot, her tears still falling from her chin. Her deep eyes
566 looked hollow, weak. As shattered as Tomoyo had been when Sakura had
567 found her the first time. That realization sent a chill down Sakura’s
568 spine. She had never seen Tomoyo like this before. She had caught a
569 glimpse of it back before they had kissed, but this was utter
570 hopelessness. “Tomoyo-chan..!!” Sakura cried out as she grappled onto
571 the dark haired woman again, burying her head against the crook of
572 Tomoyo’s neck. Just what had she done to Tomoyo? The woman looked
573 lost, alone. Shattered. Was it her fault? Had she slowly done that to
574 Tomoyo? The thought terrified her. How could she have caused such
575 damage? No wonder Tomoyo had been about to die. For her, she reminded
576 herself. Tomoyo had been trying to protect her to the bitter end.
577 “Tomoyo-chan, I know. I know how you feel.” She felt Tomoyo tense in
578 her arms at her words, but she just held onto her tighter. “I know
579 what I’ve done. And I’m so sorry. I’m so, so sorry, Tomoyo-chan. I
580 had no idea. But that doesn’t make up for what I did. I never knew
581 how important you were to me. But I do now. I know why you were going
582 to.. to k..” Sakura trailed off, unable to continue that thought.
583 Images of a dead Tomoyo returned unbidden in her mind. She blinked
584 back burning tears. “And if you still want to, I won’t stop you,”
585 Sakura whispered. She felt Tomoyo’s head shift against her at that,
586 Tomoyo’s own tears falling against her. “But if you do, please hold
587 your hand out to me. Because I won’t be without you anymore. If
588 you’re going to die, I want to die with you. Because I can’t live a
589 life without you. I’m sorry it took me so long to understand that.”
590 Moving back slightly, she looked into Tomoyo’s tear filled, stormy
591 blue eyes. Her own emerald eyes looked back at her with a firey
592 determination. She meant every word of what she said. Forcing Tomoyo
593 to live for her sake wasn’t right. If the pain was too much for her,
594 then.. “I’ll follow right behind you, whatever you decide,” Sakura
595 continued.
596 Choking back a sob, Tomoyo looked away. She couldn’t keep staring
597 into those emerald orbs any longer. Her body shuddered as her fists
598 clenched up. Sakura knew? Panic began to grow in her heart, but
599 Sakura’s words played over again and again in her mind. Part of her
600 still wanted to die, to escape the pain and her own lonely heart.
601 Sakura would allow her to leave? But how could she if Sakura herself
602 would be following? “Sakura-chan,” Tomoyo whispered softly, her voice
603 barely audible above the wind. “I just want you to be happy.”
604 Sakura ventured a weak smile, reaching out shaky fingers to brush
605 away some of Tomoyo’s tears. “You make me happy,” she whispered in
606 reply. Jade eyes blinked back tears as she met Tomoyo’s eyes once
607 more. “Tomoyo-chan, I’m sorry for all of the pain I’ve caused you.”
608 Tomoyo began to argue the point, but Sakura shook her head, cutting
609 the lavender haired woman off. “I’m sorry for not knowing my own
610 heart. I let everyone else tell me who I loved without looking
611 myself. And I didn’t realize the damage it caused. I thought everyone
612 else knew my heart better than I could. But I know now that that
613 isn’t true. No one could tell me who I loved. I had to find it out
614 for myself. And I finally did. I finally figured it all out.” The
615 brunette smiled a little more proudly. “Tomoyo-chan, I love you. I
616 know that now. You’ve always been the one who made me happy. When
617 you’re not there, I.. It isn’t like when I’m with you. I don’t feel
618 strong enough. I don’t have all of Tomoyo-chan’s love and support to
619 back me up. So how can I keep going?” The Cardmistress took a deep
620 breath as she watched Tomoyo. “I can’t be happy without you. So I
621 want to be with you, wherever you go. I love you, Tomoyo-chan.”
622 Shock crossed Tomoyo’s face as her lavender hair fluttered in the
623 wind. Her mouth opened slowly, but nothing came out. Never had she
624 believed she would hear those words. They were a fantasy, something
625 that had been a vivid and beautiful dream but nothing more. To hear
626 Sakura utter them, to see those emerald eyes looking at her with all
627 honesty. It seemed that her whole life had been built around her love
628 for Sakura. But she had always been in the background, loving her but
629 never being loved. Helping her to find the love that she herself
630 could not have. She had no doubt that she herself would do anything
631 for Sakura, but the thought that Sakura would do the same, follow her
632 even in death, simply astounded her. Releasing a pent up sob,
633 Tomoyo’s pale body shook lightly. This was all too much. She didn’t
634 know what she was supposed to do. She held her head weakly, her eyes
635 shutting out the world around her. But it was Sakura’s words that
636 finally shattered her confusion. ‘You make me happy’. ‘I want the one
637 I like to be happy,’ Tomoyo had said long ago. “Sakura-chan!!” Tomoyo
638 got out as she held onto Sakura tightly, dark hair draping over the
639 both of them. “I’ve always loved you,” the lavender haired woman
640 whispered into Sakura’s ear as she poured all of her remaining
641 strength into simply holding onto the Cardmistress.
642 Resting her head against Tomoyo’s, Sakura let her eyes fall closed.
643 She felt drained from everything, but the pale woman’s embrace
644 comforted and soothed her weary spirit. She buried her face in
645 Tomoyo’s lavender hair, delighting in the intoxicating scent. It was
646 over. She had finally managed to save Tomoyo after all. After all
647 those years of waiting, she had finally reached her princess. No, it
648 wasn’t over. Not in the least. Things were just beginning. Sakura
649 didn’t know where things would go or what would happen, but it hardly
650 seemed to matter. If Tomoyo was with her, she could overcome
651 anything. “Everything will always be right. I promise, Tomoyo-chan.”
652 Silence reigned for long moments, the only sound the howling of the
653 wind. Tomoyo shifted against Sakura, her broken heart rejoicing.
654 Maybe.. Maybe she wasn’t all alone. And maybe she could make Sakura
655 happy after all. Besides, she knew Sakura better than anyone else.
656 And devoting her life to Sakura sounded like the most delicious
657 punishment for nearly leaving Sakura’s life. Her nose brushed
658 Sakura’s ear as she moved against the other woman, content to immerse
659 herself in their embrace. “Sakura-chan makes a very cute angel.” The
660 two giggled together, laughing into the dark night. Everything had
661 been so painful and so desperate for so long. It felt so nice to let
662 it all leak away, to let go. Tomoyo’s heavy eyelids fell closed. She
663 felt exhausted from the long night and the emotional torment that had
664 held her tightly in its grasp. It felt peaceful in Sakura’s arms,
665 warmer than she can imagine being in a long time. “I’ll make you
666 happy, Sakura-chan,” the lavender haired woman vowed in her soft,
667 gentle voice.
668 “I know, Tomoyo-chan. I know,” Sakura replied, finally allowing
669 herself to relax. All of the chaos of the past few days had nearly
670 been too much for her to handle, especially without Tomoyo’s support
671 to make it through it all. It felt so nice to know that it was
672 finally gone. Her princess was rescued and all was right with the
673 world. Not a bad days work. Her old life may be left behind, but
674 Sakura felt a thrill at the new life that lay ahead of her. Whatever
675 promise or perils it held, the brunette would be happy to face them.
676 Watching Sakura silently, Tomoyo sighed in contentment. The girl
677 she had loved for so long was now right in front of her. Her love
678 wasn’t hidden any longer. She smiled lovingly at Sakura, cupping the
679 slightly surprised brunette’s chin. Licking her dry lips, Tomoyo
680 allowed herself to repeat what had shortly before felt like a
681 grievous mistake. It was a slow, soft kiss that warmed Tomoyo’s heart
682 and soul. It felt like all of the unfinished feelings and the
683 uncertainty of their last kiss was finally washed away. It wasn’t a
684 farewell kiss, or even a gesture between friends. This was a new
685 beginning. Tomoyo’s hands rested gently on Sakura’s warm cheeks while
686 Sakura’s arms wrapped around her waist. She could feel Sakura’s blush
687 fade away as Sakura began kissing her back. Sitting back, Tomoyo’s
688 hand went to her own cheek as disappointment colored her expression.
689 “Oh no...”
690 Sakura looked at Tomoyo hazily, her lips still warm from Tomoyo’s
691 brief presence. She wanted to lean forward and continue the
692 delightful action, but the lavender haired girl’s expression shook
693 her out of her stupor. “Huh? What’s wrong Tomoyo-chan?” Her heart
694 began to beat in panic. She had thought everything was finally
695 resolved.
696 Tomoyo’s fingers reached out and tugged lightly on the costume
697 Sakura was wearing. “Sakura-chan finished my last costume? And wore
698 it? And I didn’t get to get any of it on video?” she said in utter
699 despair.
700 Sweatdropping, Sakura tilted her head to the side. She should have
701 seen that coming. “Tomoyo-chan..” Sakura blushed slightly as she
702 leaned towards Tomoyo, her lips halting inches away from the pale
703 woman’s. “I’ll let you videotape me as much as you want in it.
704 Later.” Leaning the rest of the way, Sakura kissed the gentle
705 heiress, all the anguish from the time they had first been apart
706 months ago melting away at the slow but luxurious kiss.
707 Tomoyo returned the kiss with all of the pent up love that had been
708 buried in her heart for over nine years. Sakura made a soft sound as
709 the kiss became more passionate, only spurring Tomoyo forward. Seeing
710 Sakura in her last costume, seeing it finished, it all made the
711 moment even more perfect. She had felt so sad when she realized she
712 wouldn’t be making anymore costumes for Sakura anymore. But Sakura
713 had come to her rescue wearing it, having finished it some time
714 before. Sakura had saved her body and her lonely, broken soul. Tomoyo
715 lost herself to the kiss, to Sakura’s sweet embrace. The Tokyo Tower,
716 the surging wind, the night sky, it all faded away as surely as
717 Tomoyo had intended to. But she no longer had such drastic desires.
718 All she wanted was to stay there with Sakura, to love her. Pulling
719 away slowly from their kiss, Tomoyo smiled happily. But this time,
720 she hid nothing from the brunette. Sakura held onto her on the cold
721 ground, but neither seemed to notice. They had both reached this
722 point from such different places. Tomoyo had always known the love in
723 her heart, but had hid it to protect the one she loved. Sakura hadn’t
724 known her own heart until it was almost too late, but she hadn’t been
725 able to hide it in the least. Despite the different roads traveled,
726 it didn’t matter. Because from now on, they would be travelling the
727 same road together.
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