moonlitnights: old/stories/callme.txt comparison

comparison old/stories/callme.txt @ 2:fc00894c1d4a moonlitnights

[svn r3] moved all the bad stuff to 'old'

author	rlm
date	Fri, 19 Feb 2010 20:53:12 -0500
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-:dbe144217c71
+:fc00894c1d4a
+Starry, Starry Night
+by Amazoness Duo
+amazonessduo@hotmail.com
+Slam. The door slamming shut fails to startle the usually jumpy
+Sakura Kinomoto. Perhaps it is because she’s the reason behind it.
+Perhaps it is because the day has been far too long for her. Her
+genki spirits are drained, strained to their limit. Even her
+seemingly boundless energy has limits, apparently. Or perhaps it is
+simply that she doesn’t care.
+Her shoes lie sloppily by the door, her body slipping them off only
+out of years of habit. There they lay, discarded by their mistress as
+she limps off towards her room, a broken prince making her way back
+to her conquered kingdom.
+“I should have known you were home, monster. You make enough noise
+to wake the dead,” her brother says from the couch.
+She hardly hears him. Her world is thousands of miles away, a
+distant speck in the sky. Everything reaches her from light years
+away, travelling an eternity to reach her. For once she doesn’t feel
+like arguing. She hasn’t the will to bother. She merely climbs the
+stairs, one foot at a time, focussing only on the next step. If her
+brother is concerned by her strange behavior, she pays no attention.
+Finally returning to her room, the seemingly vanquished Cardmistress
+stumbles inside. Her bookbag drops to the floor near her door. She
+doesn’t bother changing out of her school uniform. Keeping it nice
+and neat, relaxing into something more comfortable, neither matter to
+her at the moment. She simply collapses on her bed, her body giving
+up its long struggle to reach that point. She lies there, time
+standing still. Yet she knows this won’t last. There are more dragons
+to slay, after all. There’s still far too much going on for her to
+actually rest for long.
+The auburn haired girl waits impatiently for the silence to break,
+for her rest to come to an abrupt halt. But it continues on, a quiet
+purgatory, halfway between peace and the worries that keep stabbing
+at her brain for her attention. So apparently Kero isn’t here. She
+sighs in relief. She doesn’t think she can deal with the Seal Beast
+at the moment. He’s important to her, but she is feeling too
+miserable to listen to him right now. He isn’t exactly the best
+person to go to when she was feeling like this.
+There was one person who could always help when she was like this.
+Who always managed to make sense out of her tangled web of feelings,
+sorting it all out with an expert hand, never breaking a single
+strand, her gentle touch unraveling the spider’s web in her heart
+into a single clear thread. But alas, this sorceress of her heart was
+far away now.
+Life was so much more difficult without someone to turn to when
+things went wrong, without someone to subtly lead her in the right
+direction. It wasn’t until Tomoyo was gone that she realized how much
+she relied on the other girl. She had never felt this weak and
+miserable back when Tomoyo had been in her life. No matter how bad
+things got, the eccentric heiress could take away her worries with a
+few soft words and usually leave her blushing in the process.
+Sakura sighs, rolling over onto her back, staring up at her roof. It
+was her own fault. She should try harder to stay in touch. But it was
+so difficult. Life was so complicated. And Tomoyo always seemed to be
+busy with something. And she lived so far away. She had to take a bus
+just to reach her house. It had all started when they had entered
+high school. Sakura had been surprised when Tomoyo went to a
+different high school. She should have known that would happen, but
+it still hit her pretty hard. Tomoyo was one of the smartest people
+in her class, after all, always getting high marks in everything. But
+somehow she had thought Tomoyo would always be there. So they went to
+different schools. They both had so much to do. And then Syaoran came
+back and Tomoyo got even busier for some reason. It had been quite a
+while since Sakura had last seen her dark haired friend. That thought
+sends a cold chill through her. She feels guilty and lonely all at
+the same time.
+Turning her head, Sakura gazes at her phone. Spellbound, she reaches
+for it. But she can’t call her. It would only seem like she only came
+to her when she needed help. She should wait until this had passed.
+So that she could call Tomoyo simply to call her, for nothing else.
+Yes, that’s a good idea.
+But it’s too late. The phone is already ringing. Sakura must have
+dialed while she was thinking about all that. She must have been more
+eager to call than even she had realized. She sits anxiously, her
+heart fluttering nervously in her chest. It had been weeks. What
+should she say? What will Tomoyo think? What has she been up to? The
+phone rings and rings. Sakura breaths a sigh of mixed relief and
+disappointment. Tomoyo must not be home. She wants to hear her, but
+at least this solves her problem of calling when she can’t handle
+things without her friend’s delicate touch.
+“Moshi moshi,” a soft voice answers on the other end of the phone.
+Sakura freezes. She doesn’t know how long it is before she answers,
+but it feels like a lifetime. She swallows nervously and speaks
+haltingly into the phone. “Hi.. ano... Tomoyo-chan? Is.. Are you..
+This is Sakura-chan.” She blinks, wondering just how stupid she
+sounds. But her thoughts fail her. She can’t think. In panic, she
+almost wants to hang up and pretend she didn’t call. Maybe Tomoyo
+will think it was a wrong number. Well, if she hadn’t mentioned her
+name.
+A small giggle on the other end. “I’d remember your voice anywhere,
+Sakura-chan. It’s so wonderful to hear from you again.” Dark hair
+gets pushed behind her ear as she repositions the phone. “You sound
+just as beautiful as I remember.” A soft sigh. “How have you been,
+Sakura-chan?”
+“I’ve been all right,” Sakura says, though she certainly doesn’t
+feel all right. But it was accurate enough. She may not have been her
+best lately, but she could have been much worse, right? “Just busy, I
+guess. High school’s a lot harder than I expected. Especially without
+you there to help me understand some of the lessons. I probably
+wouldn’t have even passed the entrance exams without you helping me
+study for them.”
+The other girl shakes her head, not believing the praise. “Sakura-
+chan would have done just fine on her own. You would have rushed at
+the last moment without me, but you would have passed them all just
+fine. And I’m sure your father’s still proud of your grades even
+without me to help you. You’re very bright, Sakura-chan. You just
+don’t pay attention enough to certain things because your mind is
+always elsewhere. But I would never want to change that. It’s too
+cute to get rid of. So I don’t think anyone would mind if your grades
+suffer just a bit because of it. It’s who you are.”
+A small smile plays at Sakura’s lips. She rolls on her side, her
+legs pulling up to her stomach. “Thank you, Tomoyo-chan. I guess I
+haven’t been paying as much attention as I could. But there’s always
+so much to think about. It’s hard to focus on the lessons all the
+time.”
+Tomoyo giggles. “See? So my Sakura-chan has nothing to worry about.
+You’ll do just fine, I promise.”
+Sakura nods, starting to believe it. “It always feels like that when
+I talk to you. Like it really will be all right. ‘Everything will
+always be all right,’ ne, Tomoyo-chan?”
+“Of course it will, Sakura-chan. You just have to keep believing
+that. You will make it all work out. That’s your own special type of
+magic. Never give up. You can overcome anything. I have faith in you.
+I know everything will be all right for you,” Tomoyo replies
+comfortingly.
+Emerald eyes close, the world slipping away. She holds onto Tomoyo’s
+voice, her only anchor to the world. It laps about her like a gentle
+wave, caressing away the aches and pains in her heart. “But what
+about you?” she asks, not even sure why. But the way Tomoyo said
+that... She wants things to work out for her best friend, too. Not
+only herself. Otherwise what was the point?
+There’s a pause on the other end. It’s only for half a second, but
+it feels so long for Tomoyo. But when she replies, she sounds like
+her normal eccentric self. “If everything is all right for Sakura-
+chan, then everything will be fine for me. Because then I’ll know
+you’re happy. That’s all I really want.”
+Sakura swallows painfully, her eyes closing tighter. “Tomoyo-chan...
+I’m sorry I haven’t seen you in a while.”
+The heiress gingerly brushes away the apology. “Please don’t worry,
+Sakura-chan. I know you’ve been busy. Especially with Li-kun back.
+You have a lot going on in your life. You finally have a love life
+now on top of everything else, after all.”
+This time it’s Sakura’s turn to pause. She hadn’t known how to
+explain that. Or what to say about it. Or even where to begin. “You
+know that Li-kun is here?”
+“Hai,” Tomoyo replies. “Meiling-chan told me. We’ve been keeping in
+contact. I’ve been writing her some letters. I think she’s needed
+someone to talk to who understands. She isn’t taking Li-kun being in
+love with you very well. But don’t worry, Sakura-chan. She’s a strong
+girl. She reminds me of my mother. I think she’ll be just fine.” What
+Tomoyo doesn’t mention is how her mother had handled the loss of her
+own love. If Meiling takes the same path, then she probably won’t
+ever be on good terms with Sakura. But there is no point in worrying
+the Cardmistress about such things.
+“But.. I need you..” Sakura whispers, barely audibly. She feels a
+tinge of jealousy that Meiling was getting Tomoyo’s letters, getting
+Tomoyo’s support when she wanted it herself. She misses it terribly,
+having the dark haired girl there with her, to catch her when she
+stumbled, to help push her forward when she wasn’t strong enough
+herself. She wasn’t the same without Tomoyo there beside her. Tomoyo
+brought out things inside of her that made life so much more amazing.
+Life on her own felt so tedious. It was too normal, too boring
+without the cute girl videotaping her every movement, whispering
+embarrassing things to her, giving her all the love and support she
+could need.
+“Sakura-chan?”
+Sakura shakes her head, swallowing again and again to force down the
+knot in her throat. She shouldn’t cry now. Tomoyo was her friend. She
+didn’t need to worry about her problems when she was so busy. She
+tries to speak, but she stops herself, her voice about to break.
+She’ll cry if she says something, she knows it.
+“Sakura-chan?” Tomoyo says, more anxiously this time. “Are you all
+right? What’s been happening? What’s wrong?” Her voice is still a
+whisper, but now it’s stronger, trying to make sure it gets to
+Sakura. Sakura is supposed to be happy now. Things are supposed to be
+working out for her. But there are tears laced under Sakura’s words.
+Something is bothering her auburn haired friend. And she hadn’t been
+there to help it. She had been trying to step back from Sakura’s
+life, leaving her in Syaoran’s capable hands. At least, she had
+thought they were capable. But if that was the case, why wasn’t
+Sakura going to him right now? She wants to reach out and hold the
+other girl, but all she can do is wait for the silence to end.
+“He’s... I’ve just been...” Sakura swallows again, blinking again
+and again. The tears sting at her eyes as she struggles to find her
+voice. But she can’t use magic to return it the way she had
+recaptured Tomoyo’s voice. Her teary eyes blink open. On her desk she
+sees a picture of herself with her boyfriend, his face scowling even
+in the picture of the two of them. Just as he always did. Those amber
+eyes looking into her own so uncomfortably. But when she closed her
+eyes on those starry, starry nights, she didn’t see those amber eyes.
+Those eyes could not read her soul. They couldn’t see into her heart.
+They didn’t blaze passionately the way the beautiful stormy blue eyes
+in her mind did, the ones she gazed into under the moonlight in her
+dreams. “Sometimes I wish you had been a boy. Then maybe you would
+have fallen in love with me.” Sakura laughs weakly, only half joking.
+“You always understood me. You were always there for me. I always
+felt safe with you. Like it didn't matter that my feelings were
+always so confusing. You helped me sort them out. You took such great
+care of my heart. Like it was a delicate treasure.”'
+"I wouldn't need to be a boy to fall in love with you, Sakura-chan,"
+Tomoyo's soft voice whispers through the phone. It is so quiet that
+Sakura has to strain to hear her now.
+The Cardmistress finds herself blushing once again. But this time
+she doesn’t try to ignore it. She won’t just push it off this time.
+“Really?” she asks, almost desperately. She was afraid what she had
+said about Tomoyo being a boy would sound stupid or embarrassing. But
+the dark haired girl had soothed away her worries again with her
+response. Had, in fact, sprung up some hope in Sakura’s heart. “I
+didn’t realize how happy you made me until I stopped seeing you,
+Tomoyo-chan. I miss you. I miss you so much.” Sakura feels hot tears
+slip down her cheeks as she rolls onto her back again, a hand over
+her heart.
+Tomoyo blinks weakly. She is having trouble focussing. Everything
+feels so hazy and dreamlike. She’s so tired, but she pushes past that
+as best she can. A warm smile lights up her face. “I’ve missed you,
+too, Sakura-chan. More than you could ever know. You’re all I ever
+think about. You always made me happy, too. All of my happiest times
+were with you.”
+“Tomoyo-chan...” Sakura clutches the phone tightly, her heart
+rumbling in her chest. There is so much she wants to say, but she
+doesn’t even know where to begin. Her feelings are all a jumble, just
+as always. But maybe that isn’t such a bad thing. Tomoyo always
+understood before. Even when she herself didn’t know what lay in her
+heart.
+“Sakura-chan... I’ll always love you...” Tomoyo whispers sleepily,
+her voice barely carrying over the phone. She looks blearily at her
+mother’s letter opener, wiping away the fresh blood from it with
+weak, numb fingers. The phone ringing had barely managed to catch her
+attention after she had used it to etch out a ticket away from her
+life. Life without Sakura was too empty. It was like getting a taste
+of heaven and then being snatched away, separated from that bliss. It
+is so nice to hear Sakura one last time, she thinks tiredly. What a
+perfect goodbye present. It’s a good thing that Sakura can’t see her
+bloody and in her nightgown in bed. Her poor Cardmistress wouldn’t
+take that well at all. So this way, she could find a softer way of
+saying goodbye. She tries so hard to keep thinking, but it’s all
+getting so much more difficult. Her room seems so far away. The last
+thing she hears is Sakura’s beautiful voice ringing in her ears. The
+voice of an angel. Her angel.
+And as always, Tomoyo somehow hands Sakura the missing piece. Things
+slowly begin to fit. A beautiful picture begins to take shape, it’s
+implications almost too much for Sakura to take in all at once. No,
+she hadn’t been in love with Syaoran after all. He wasn’t the one who
+nurtured her heart, who shared her deepest joys and darkest sorrows.
+He wasn’t the one who loved her for all that she was. The puzzle
+slowly completed itself in her mind’s eye. It held a gorgeous picture
+of a girl with deep blue eyes and snow white skin, dark hair flowing
+about her. Tomoyo. It had always been Tomoyo. That’s why her life
+wasn’t working without her. She truly does need the dark haired
+heiress. More than she could possibly imagine. “I love you, too,
+Tomoyo-chan...” she answers, her cheeks red. It feels so freeing to
+say it, to let it out. Yes, she loves her. Boy or not. It didn’t
+matter. Tomoyo completed her life. Without her, everything was chaos.
+She waits anxiously for Tomoyo’s reply, but nothing comes. The phone
+slowly slips away from the dark haired girl’s dead fingers,
+clattering to the floor. “Tomoyo-chan?” Sakura asks. No response.
+“Tomoyo-chan?” Perhaps Tomoyo had fallen asleep. She had sounded so
+tired on the phone, so weak and quiet. Yes, that’s it. Sakura listens
+intently, but she can’t even hear Tomoyo’s gentle breathing on the
+other end. “Tomoyo-chan?” Still nothing. It’s as if the world has
+gone silent on the other end of the phone.
+“Tomoyo-chan? I love you...”
+Click.

Mercurial > moonlitnights

comparison old/stories/callme.txt @ 2:fc00894c1d4a moonlitnights