Mercurial > moonlitnights
comparison old/stories/althea2.txt @ 2:fc00894c1d4a moonlitnights
[svn r3] moved all the bad stuff to 'old'
| author | rlm |
|---|---|
| date | Fri, 19 Feb 2010 20:53:12 -0500 |
| parents | |
| children |
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| 1:dbe144217c71 | 2:fc00894c1d4a |
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| 1 Why | |
| 2 by Althea K. | |
| 3 | |
| 4 | |
| 5 | |
| 6 I know you couldn't possibly understand. And that's alright. I don't | |
| 7 expect you to. | |
| 8 | |
| 9 And I know that if I did try to explain it to you, you would protest | |
| 10 and say that I'm wrong, that no one will ever be more important to | |
| 11 you than I. And that's alright, too. Because I would know you didn't | |
| 12 mean to lie. | |
| 13 | |
| 14 Someday, you'll be gone. Oh, sure, we might stay in touch: | |
| 15 occasional phone calls with long, uncomfortable silences, chance | |
| 16 meetings in public places involving forced, halting conversation and | |
| 17 maybe some awkward attempt at physical contact. But do you honestly | |
| 18 believe that as the years go by we'll be able to maintain this kind | |
| 19 of intensity? Believe me, there is nothing I would love more than to | |
| 20 remain forever the center of your universe, the focus of your life, | |
| 21 that routine yet joyous event that every day must be planned around. | |
| 22 I would love so much to spend my every moment by your side, to always | |
| 23 have your voice, rough with sleep, be the very first I hear when I | |
| 24 wake each morning. | |
| 25 | |
| 26 But this will never be my place. | |
| 27 | |
| 28 For now I can race through the streets with your hand clasped in | |
| 29 mine; for now I can collapse on the dewey grass with you, my head | |
| 30 resting on your soft belly until the last crazed traces of laughter | |
| 31 have faded from that violent hitching and heaving to the subtlety of | |
| 32 your gentle, steady breath. But there will come a time when I can no | |
| 33 longer crawl into bed with you and dream of your ever loving me as I | |
| 34 love you and pretend to feel your lips against my forehead as I drift | |
| 35 into sleep. There will come a time when there is another in that | |
| 36 place. This fortunate person will be honoured with that goodnight | |
| 37 kiss I have always secretly longed for but never could request from | |
| 38 you. | |
| 39 | |
| 40 Our time together is so limited; I must cherish every moment I can | |
| 41 get. I must burn each and every moment into my memory, tuck each one | |
| 42 away for those bitter times ahead when I will have to watch you from | |
| 43 a distance, walking by his side. What else will keep me warm those | |
| 44 cold nights when you will run to his arms instead of mine? | |
| 45 | |
| 46 There is no way to make you understand such things. I can see it in | |
| 47 your eyes, can feel it in your touch.. | |
| 48 | |
| 49 I wish you wouldn't ask me. | |
| 50 | |
| 51 Whenever I can't answer a question of yours with total honesty, I | |
| 52 feel sick in my heart. I feel like I have lied to you, have somehow | |
| 53 let you down. But if I told you the whole truth, you wouldn't | |
| 54 understand. You simply wouldn't see. The innocence in your voice when | |
| 55 you ask me is enough to make this certain fact. What good would it do | |
| 56 to confuse you, perhaps to frighten you? I don't want to make you cry. | |
| 57 | |
| 58 And you would, wouldn't you? Cry and deny and cling to my arm. | |
| 59 Tangle loving fingers in my hair and tell me the end will never come. | |
| 60 Sing sweet lies to me, unable to see the truth through your tears of | |
| 61 naivety. | |
| 62 | |
| 63 I wish you could blind me with those tears. I wish that I didn't | |
| 64 have to see the lonely nights ahead of me with such perfect clarity. | |
| 65 I could put away my camera and grab your hand and dance with you | |
| 66 until the years fall away like sheets of silk.. I could... I could.. | |
| 67 | |
| 68 I could fall asleep on a pillow no longer damp with tears. | |
| 69 | |
| 70 I could enjoy each moment without the desperate need to capture it | |
| 71 on film. | |
| 72 | |
| 73 I could put away my camera without fear of missing anything.. | |
| 74 | |
| 75 Oh.. I wish I could forget... | |
| 76 | |
| 77 Every smile... Every laugh... I must hold... forever. | |
| 78 | |
| 79 It may be the last you ever share with me. | |
| 80 | |
| 81 | |
| 82 | |
| 83 | |
| 84 --------------------------------------------------------------------- | |
| 85 ----------- | |
| 86 | |
| 87 | |
| 88 (Legal Disclaimer: The characters and situations of Card Captor | |
| 89 Sakura belong to CLAMP and.. whoever else holds the rights.) | |
| 90 | |
| 91 (Author's Note: If you want to use this fanfic on your website, want | |
| 92 to talk about anime lesbians, or don't know what the hell this fanfic | |
| 93 was about, please email me at either womanprince@hotmail.com or | |
| 94 poorjuri@hotmail.com. Thank you.) |