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1 Summer Breeze
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2 Psychokittensenshi611
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3
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4 Her hands felt like the warm summer breeze on my cheeks. "You can’t
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5 love me." She said it like a rule; a law. Somewhere, it had been written that I
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6 would not, could not feel this emotion that ran deep inside my veins alongside my
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7 blood.
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8 "I do!" I wanted to shout at her, but it came out as only a whisper. I was
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9 so afraid, yet so contented just to be with her. "I love you"...
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10 "But you can’t!" She was able to shout out me. She pulled me closer to
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11 her face, her sweet breath like dark purple irises on my lips. "You’re... you are
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12 everything I can not be. You’re...so pure...so utterly pure." She closed her eyes
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13 and bent her head, as if to avoid staring back into mine. "I can never be what
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14 you deserve."
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15 My heart felt like it would sink down in my chest or rise above it at any
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16 moment. Couldn’t she see? Couldn’t she open her eyes and her heart? "I don’t
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17 know what I deserve"but you’re what I want. You’re everything I could ever
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18 want and you’re what I need." She was shaking, her hands were shaking on my
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19 cheeks. The breeze was faltering. "Hotaru-chan, please," I touched her chin
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20 gently.
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21 She looked up at me once again, tears trickling down her pale cheeks in
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22 small rivers of diamond tears. "Oh Chibi-Usa," her lips shook out the words.
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23 "How could you want me?" I wiped the tears gently from her cheeks. "I’m...the
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24 darkness"and you’re the light. You are life and I am death." She looked down
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25 at her knees again. "How could you love me?"
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26 "You’re wrong, Hotaru-chan!" I could feel my heart rising higher, into my
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27 breasts and hands and feet, spreading inside of me. "You may be death, but you
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28 are also rebirth. You begin life, starting anew in a cycle that I have yet to
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29 understand." I leaned close into her face, wanting to feel her iris breath again.
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30 "You are everything I could ever want, Hotaru-chan. You are beauty in the
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31 darkness. You are my light." Her lips were so close to mine. "How could I not
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32 want you?"
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33 Her face flushed, pale cheeks that never seemed to tan turning a light
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34 crimson. "Don’t say that, please don’t say that…"
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35 And, suddenly, it didn’t seem to matter to her what she had shouted
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36 before. When I leaned in just enough to feel her soft, full lips upon mine…well,
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37 that was the end of everything and the beginning of something completely new. I
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38 could feel her hands at the base of my neck, tugging at the ends of my hair. I
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39 couldn’t stop myself from touching her pale arms, letting my hands meander up
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40 to her shoulders and down her back. She was so warm, so soft, like sheets of
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41 silk left out in the sun. I felt her lips pull away slightly from mine, and I moved
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42 away a bit, just enough to end the kiss but still to feel her warmth. She sighed
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43 heavily onto my cheek and rested her head on my shoulder.
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44 "Chibi-Usa," she said, her voice barely above a whisper. "We can’t be
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45 together like this."
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46 "What do you mean?" I nuzzled my head on top of hers, catching the
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47 scent of her hair. Lilacs. I smiled.
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48 "We can’t be…be lovers." She moved slightly, her voice slightly softer.
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49 "You’re to become Princess of Crystal Tokyo in the future. You are going to
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50 inherit a crown. You can’t…be with me…"
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51 "Hotaru-chan." I felt that warm, rose colored feeling rise in my chest once
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52 again. Sparks could fly off of my fingertips. Mountains would crumple at my very
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53 whim…or at hers. I could do anything with this feeling. I could do anything with
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54 her. "I want you, I need you. I love you. All that I ask of you is that you give me
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55 a chance, you give us a chance." She sobbed lightly into the curve of my neck.
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56 "Please, Hotaru-chan…the future isn’t unchangeable. Just me coming to the
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57 past all these times has changed it."
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58 "But…"
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59 "Hush, Hotaru-chan." I cradled her head close to mine. I smiled slightly.
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60 "Normally, I’m the one crying to you." We both chuckled a bit. "Hotaru-chan, I
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61 just want you to…to let me love you. Just for awhile."
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62 "But don’t you see? Can’t you see that if I let you then – "
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63 "Then what?"
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64 She paused, moving away from me and wiping her tears. "Chibi-
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65 Usa…this can’t work."
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66 "No, what would happen?"
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67 "Don’t you see, it can’t work, because – "
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68 "No, don’t ignore me." I pulled her closer once again. "What would
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69 happen if you and I became a couple?"
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70 She was quiet, just staring back into my eyes and quivering a bit in my
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71 arms. She didn’t even seem to breathe. Her lovely, thin frame rest so close to
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72 mine on the floor of her dimly lit room. Pale hands and feet seemed even paler
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73 in comparison to her dark clothes. My little black angel. "I can’t tell you…not
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74 now…"
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75 "What is it, Hotaru-chan?" I pulled her onto my knees. "I’ve told you a
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76 secret I’ve kept from you for awhile now. Why can’t you tell me?"
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77 She swallowed audibly. "I’ve loved you for as long as I can remember.
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78 Since I first met you, Chibi-Usa. And if we are together, and I let myself love
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79 you…it’ll just be like everyone else. I don’t want you to leave…to go away like
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80 everyone I’ve loved…"
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81 "I could never go away from you." I couldn’t feel anything for a minute. It
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82 was like my heart stopped beating in my chest. My veins continued only to pump
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83 the crimson feeling of love I felt for her. And then, whenever my heart decided to
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84 start up again, I was kissing her. It was with a kind of fierceness that she kissed
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85 me back. Her small caresses and fierce kisses and explorations made me weak
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86 in my knees.
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87 The silver and golden rays of sunlight drifted into Hotaru’s room. I just lay
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88 there for awhile, surrounded by her sweet scent and wrapped in her arms. The
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89 shadows of tree leaves left dark spots across her blanket and bare midriff. I
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90 couldn’t help but stare at her. God, she was beautiful. Lying there like that. Her
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91 hair a bit messed up, strands sprawled out behind her head on her pillow. Her
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92 eyes were closed, but I knew them with just a memory. Dark purple, almost
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93 black, deep as any ocean but clear as a sunny sky. How could one human being
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94 be so perfect, so utterly beautiful in every way? How could someone like her
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95 love someone like me?
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96 I kissed her shoulders, just for the feeling of her silken skin on my lips.
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97 There was nothing more I wanted in the world than to be there with her, lying in
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98 her comfortable bed, bathed in the strong light of the sun or the pale, comforting
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99 light of the moon. There was no other place that could soothe me like this. Her
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100 arms were my only shelter, her lips my only release.
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101 She stirred a bit, her muscles moving slightly underneath my lips and
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102 hands. I rested my head by her breast, loving the sound of her heart beating
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103 beneath my ears. Her breathing relaxed me…deep and smooth and soft all at
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104 once. I closed my eyes, just loving the feel of her beside me, underneath me, all
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105 around me.
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