annotate old/stories/desolation.txt @ 4:69f0191c9016 moonlitnights tip

added error.log and access.log
author Robert McIntyre <rlm@mit.edu>
date Tue, 22 Jun 2010 13:42:35 -0400
parents fc00894c1d4a
children
rev   line source
rlm@2 1 Hi!
rlm@2 2 Words written like _this_ are in Italics.
rlm@2 3 This is kind of an epilogue to the trilogy Hotaru's Pain. It makes
rlm@2 4 more sense if you read that one first, but what do I care about
rlm@2 5 what you do. I kinda like this story.
rlm@2 6
rlm@2 7
rlm@2 8 Letters from Desolation Row
rlm@2 9 By the Ghost of 'lectricity
rlm@2 10
rlm@2 11
rlm@2 12 Prologue
rlm@2 13 Tangled up in Blue
rlm@2 14
rlm@2 15 So now I'm goin' back again
rlm@2 16 Got to get to her somehow
rlm@2 17 We always did feel the same
rlm@2 18 We just saw it from a different point of view
rlm@2 19
rlm@2 20 Bob Dylan
rlm@2 21
rlm@2 22
rlm@2 23 Part 1
rlm@2 24 Desolation Row
rlm@2 25
rlm@2 26 A young woman was sitting under a massive tree atop a hill. It
rlm@2 27 was a strong and a very old tree; it must have stood there for
rlm@2 28 ages. The leaves of the mighty tree were filtering the warm
rlm@2 29 sunlight as it shone down in golden blots upon the woman. A warm
rlm@2 30 summer breeze was blowing up the hill, tangling the woman's black
rlm@2 31 hair with little tongues of air licking past her face. Tufts of her
rlm@2 32 hair were swirled about and danced around her neck while the wind
rlm@2 33 relieved a bit of the heat of the summer afternoon.
rlm@2 34 In the valley below the hill, spread before the woman, lay the
rlm@2 35 city of Crystal Tokyo, home of Neo Queen Serenity and King Endymion
rlm@2 36 - and their daughter.
rlm@2 37 The woman looked about twenty, twenty-five at best. As young as
rlm@2 38 her body seemed, her eyes told a whole different story. Her dark
rlm@2 39 jewels lost the glow of youth a long time ago. Her eyes were that
rlm@2 40 of an old woman, a woman who has seen generations go by, who has
rlm@2 41 seen lives of people that grew close to her wither away like the
rlm@2 42 leaves of this mighty tree do every year. A woman who has witnessed
rlm@2 43 horrors other people never dare to think of, let alone imagine
rlm@2 44 them.
rlm@2 45 The only one who could still smile genuinely after all those years
rlm@2 46 was the queen. And how couldn't she... She had someone to love her,
rlm@2 47 someone as immortal as they all were. And she had a beautiful
rlm@2 48 daughter.
rlm@2 49 Oh, had she have never met her, how different her life would be.
rlm@2 50 She would have died long ago, the torture of immortality would have
rlm@2 51 been spared to her. Her loneliness would have lasted only a
rlm@2 52 lifetime, her object of desire would have stayed hidden from her
rlm@2 53 eyes. But now she must face eternity alone, with her princess just
rlm@2 54 within reach, yet so unattainable.
rlm@2 55 People regarded them as angels, avatars, or something similar yet
rlm@2 56 she was already broken, long before the sky will ever open for her.
rlm@2 57 Forsaken she was sinking beneath the flood of tears that dried out
rlm@2 58 centuries ago.
rlm@2 59 How she wished she could be as strong as this tree was. But she
rlm@2 60 wasn't. She was weak. Who would want someone as weak as her? Why
rlm@2 61 does a princess want someone as weak as her?
rlm@2 62
rlm@2 63
rlm@2 64 Part 2
rlm@2 65 Blood in my Eyes
rlm@2 66
rlm@2 67 A young woman was heading up a hill to the north of Crystal Tokyo.
rlm@2 68 The hill was off grounds for the citizens of Crystal Tokyo. The
rlm@2 69 hill was off grounds even for the members of the Royal Family and
rlm@2 70 the Senshi. The hill had a concentrated amount of negative energy.
rlm@2 71 Many fatal accidents happened here in the recent past, the few
rlm@2 72 suicides that were committed in this city of angels were committed
rlm@2 73 here.
rlm@2 74 The hot summer afternoon was already turning into evening but the
rlm@2 75 heat was still unbearable. The hands and knees of the young woman
rlm@2 76 were bleeding as she fell to the ground more than once - the heat
rlm@2 77 and the negative karma taking their toll. And yet she continued
rlm@2 78 walking the path that led her to the top. For someone was waiting
rlm@2 79 at the top. Someone who has been waiting there for a long time.
rlm@2 80 Once she had already walked this path in vain. The one atop the
rlm@2 81 hill sent her away... But why? They had sworn each other love. But
rlm@2 82 that was a long time ago for the one atop the hill. Did she tire of
rlm@2 83 waiting? But why is she still up there then? It just doesn't make
rlm@2 84 sense...
rlm@2 85 The young woman's eyes filled with tears each time she thought
rlm@2 86 about walking this path down alone _again_. But this time the dark
rlm@2 87 beauty on the hill had a promise to keep. She smiled at how easily
rlm@2 88 and without thinking she gave away that promise. She couldn't help
rlm@2 89 but wonder if she regrets that promise now. Why was it so simple
rlm@2 90 then and why is it so hard now? If she walks this path down alone,
rlm@2 91 this time she'll at least know why. Although she doubted she'd ever
rlm@2 92 get over it.
rlm@2 93 Her feet were hurting tremendously, her knees were bleeding as
rlm@2 94 well as her hands. The sweat from her forehead was dripping into
rlm@2 95 her eyes, already sore from her crying. She needed a rest badly.
rlm@2 96 She wanted to stop right then and there but something drove her on.
rlm@2 97 _Again_. She fell to the rocky ground again. Leaving some blood
rlm@2 98 and her wish to stop behind she rose to her feet and continued her
rlm@2 99 journey through the thorns. For if there was one thing she ever
rlm@2 100 learned from her mother it was to have faith in love. And to fight
rlm@2 101 for love. Because love _will_ find a way.
rlm@2 102
rlm@2 103
rlm@2 104 Part 3
rlm@2 105 Shot of Love
rlm@2 106
rlm@2 107 There she is. She just scaled the crest and now she's standing
rlm@2 108 there as if stricken by lightning. I knew she'd come. That spoiled
rlm@2 109 brat. Can't she understand there are certain things she cannot
rlm@2 110 have? As soon as I heard she went back I knew she'd come sooner or
rlm@2 111 later. When I woke up this morning with this new memories inside my
rlm@2 112 head it was as clear as day to me. And the promise. The promise she
rlm@2 113 forced out of my 20th century self. But if I'm honest I have to
rlm@2 114 admit that she didn't force it. She couldn't do that. She's too
rlm@2 115 good to do that. If I had felt in any way unsure about it she
rlm@2 116 wouldn't pursue it further. I was so naive then. Then she was only
rlm@2 117 my lover. Now she's the princess.
rlm@2 118 She's still standing there. Watching me. Watching me watching her
rlm@2 119 watching me. Her white royal gown with the golden rings over her
rlm@2 120 chest. The wind is playing with her pigtails and the ends of her
rlm@2 121 dress. Her pigtails are slightly different than her mother's. They
rlm@2 122 are a bit puffier at their base and reach only to her knees at
rlm@2 123 best. But basically the same impossible hairstyle only the two
rlm@2 124 manage to pull off without looking silly. Her arms are hanging
rlm@2 125 helplessly at her sides, the golden rings over her chest are being
rlm@2 126 lifted and dropped by her heavy breathing. But something is wrong.
rlm@2 127 I didn't notice it at first - I admit that her sight entranced me.
rlm@2 128 Her dress is stained with blood, her eyes are red. Her hair is in a
rlm@2 129 mess, the golden rings aren't perfectly in place... But actually
rlm@2 130 they never are. She is probably the messiest princess there ever
rlm@2 131 was.
rlm@2 132 And yet she's so graceful - a sight to behold.
rlm@2 133 Now she has finally overcome the fear and she's walking up to me.
rlm@2 134 Slowly and unsure. The path leading to the top is rocky, but up her
rlm@2 135 grass is growing. I stand up; she's right in front of me. How long
rlm@2 136 will she be able to meet my gaze like that? Not even a second. She
rlm@2 137 fell down on her knees and now her deep crimson eyes full of tears
rlm@2 138 are looking anxiously up into mine. I have to be strong - for her.
rlm@2 139 "I'll keep my promise... I do still love you." Cool and collected.
rlm@2 140 I'm sorry... "But that doesn't matter. You mustn't love me!"
rlm@2 141 "Wha- What are you saying?"
rlm@2 142 "You will become the Queen of Crystal Tokyo one day. You have
rlm@2 143 obligations too keep. For one thing you have to have heirs."
rlm@2 144 "I don't care if... if our love is fruitless."
rlm@2 145 "No! You are already spoken for. Your marriage date with Prince
rlm@2 146 Helios is all but set!"
rlm@2 147 "That's not true! I don't love him!"
rlm@2 148 Can't she understand? I sit down in front of her, her eyes still
rlm@2 149 fixed on mine. "You are the future queen! You cannot love another
rlm@2 150 woman." This was the final blow. Needless to say I stressed each
rlm@2 151 word to make sure she'd understand. Now it's over. I always thought
rlm@2 152 I'd be relieved when I finally close this book. Anyway, now I can
rlm@2 153 go on with my life and find myself a girl with pink pigtails to
rlm@2 154 remind me of her. Maybe I'll even manage to love her through the
rlm@2 155 course of time.
rlm@2 156 Her face convulsed in a childlike manner when she heard these
rlm@2 157 words and she slumped down into my lap. I feel the fabric of my
rlm@2 158 dress soaking up her tears. I feel her heavy ragged breathing
rlm@2 159 against it. I can _feel_ her... For the first time in almost a
rlm@2 160 thousand years I can feel her again. I haven't realized how much I
rlm@2 161 missed the feeling of her hair between my fingers. I take a deep
rlm@2 162 breath to inhale her calming scent. Just like I remember it.
rlm@2 163 She's unlike any other person I ever met. I fail every time I try
rlm@2 164 to describe her. Angel. That is the only word that comes close. Yet
rlm@2 165 it doesn't touch her essence. It only manages to scratch the
rlm@2 166 surface. She's so much more.
rlm@2 167 I can hear her words, but they come to me from a distance.
rlm@2 168 "But I do love you. And I couldn't live without your love..."
rlm@2 169 "Why? Why don't you just let go?"
rlm@2 170 I can feel her arms tighten around my waist as she speaks into my
rlm@2 171 dress.
rlm@2 172 "I love you Hotaru-chan... I love you, I want to marry you, I want
rlm@2 173 to spend the rest of eternity with you."
rlm@2 174 At this point she raises her head and looks into my eyes. And when
rlm@2 175 is see her eyes now - for the first time so clearly - I know she
rlm@2 176 didn't lie. If I would send her away she would wither away like a
rlm@2 177 flower without water. She needs love as much as other people need
rlm@2 178 air.
rlm@2 179 Now I understand.
rlm@2 180
rlm@2 181
rlm@2 182 Epilogue
rlm@2 183 Series of Dreams
rlm@2 184
rlm@2 185 "ChibiUsa, how is this possible?"
rlm@2 186 ChibiUsa. Nobody except her calls me that any more. I guess I'm
rlm@2 187 not that chibi any more.
rlm@2 188 "Sit down over here, ChibiUsa." She steers me into that oversized
rlm@2 189 armchair we sometimes spend the evening cuddling in. She sits down
rlm@2 190 opposite to me on a chair and pierces her eyes into mine.
rlm@2 191 "Listen carefully, ChibiUsa. You are a woman. I am a woman. You
rlm@2 192 can't possibly be pregnant from me." She treats me as if I had some
rlm@2 193 kind of a disease or something. But she never doubts my loyalty to
rlm@2 194 her.
rlm@2 195 "I think it was the Ginzuishu."
rlm@2 196 "...I don't understand." Of course she doesn't, I can see it in
rlm@2 197 her eyes. She's so cute when she doesn't understand.
rlm@2 198 "A few weeks ago it was glowing slightly when I woke up in the
rlm@2 199 morning. It was so subtle that I didn't know if it was for real or
rlm@2 200 were my eyes just playing tricks on me. I'm sure it happened that
rlm@2 201 night." A few moment pass before a tear trickles down her face. A
rlm@2 202 tear of joy surely because she's smiling. She reaches out her left
rlm@2 203 hand and touches my cheek. Oh, I didn't know I was crying also. You
rlm@2 204 always do that to me. Around you I always forget about myself. She
rlm@2 205 sits down beside me in our armchair and kisses my bare shoulder.
rlm@2 206 "Hotaru-chan, I'm already pregnant. You don't have to make
rlm@2 207 passionate love to me."
rlm@2 208 "I love you, ChibiUsa."
rlm@2 209 "I love you too, Hotaru."
rlm@2 210
rlm@2 211
rlm@2 212
rlm@2 213 The End
rlm@2 214
rlm@2 215
rlm@2 216 The titles for each part are titles of Bob Dylan songs. I don't own
rlm@2 217 the copyright to them as well as I don't own the copyright for
rlm@2 218 Sailor Moon.
rlm@2 219
rlm@2 220 Peter Dobaj
rlm@2 221 The Ghost of 'lectricity
rlm@2 222 lectricity@email.si