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1 This story is a songfic about ChibiUsa a while after Hotaru has died in
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2 a battle. The song is ‘Melodies of Life’, a beautiful song from Final
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3 Fantasy 9 sung by Emiko Shiratori and written by Nobuo Uematsu. The
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4 gorgeous characters were created by the wonderfully talented Naoko
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5 Takeuchi.
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6
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7 Melodies of Life
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8 By Amazoness Quartet
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9 amazonessduo@hotmail.com
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10 ----------------
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11
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12 ~Alone for a while I've been searching through the dark
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13 For traces of the love you left inside my lonely heart
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14 To weave by picking up the pieces that remain
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15 Melodies of life--love's lost refrain~
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16
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17 Why did you have to leave me? I loved you so much. I still do.
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18 That’s why it still hurts so badly whenever I think about you. My mom
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19 says I’ve been growing distant, that I’m always lost in thought. That
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20 can’t be good for the next Queen of Crystal Tokyo. But I can’t help it,
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21 Hotaru. I miss you. When I close my eyes, I can still see that shy
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22 smile of yours, hear your soft voice calling me. I’ll always love you,
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23 even if we can’t be together. Why wouldn’t you let me come with you?
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24 Maybe I could have helped. And even if I couldn’t, at least we would
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25 have died together. You told me when you had grown up again that it was
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26 to fight alongside me. Why couldn’t I fight alongside you then? I know
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27 you wanted to protect me, but it hurts so much without you. It’s so
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28 hard to keep going. But every time I falter, every time I fall, I can
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29 feel you there with me, helping me make it through.
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30
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31 ~Our paths they did cross, though I cannot say just why
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32 We met, we laughed, we held on fast, and then we said goodbye
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33 And who'll hear the echoes of stories never told?
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34 Let them ring out loud till they unfold~
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35
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36 You were always so sad, Hotaru. Just lurking under the surface,
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37 like you could never completely escape it. Even when I could lure that
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38 smile out of you or hear your laugh, it was still there. I could never
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39 completely cure that sadness inside of you. I told you that we’d be
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40 together forever and you smiled a little sadly and didn’t say anything.
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41 I always wondered why you looked on the dark side of things so often,
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42 but I was determined to show you that things could work out. That you
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43 could have a happy ending. But now as I look back on it all, was I just
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44 naïve? Did you know all along that it would come to this? All the
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45 dreams we had shared will never take place now. All the promises I had
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46 made of our beautiful future together. I wanted to keep them so dearly,
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47 Hotaru. And I’d probably promise you them all over again if you were
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48 here, even after all that’s happened.
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49
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50 ~In my dearest memories, I see you reaching out to me
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51 Though you're gone, I still believe that you can call out my name~
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52
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53 Looking around feverishly, I find myself once again in my bed.
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54 Looking next to me, I almost expect to see you there, asleep after a
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55 passion filled night, or maybe just reading a book as you watched me
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56 dozing. Your beautiful pale body seemed to shine in the moonlight,
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57 though I needed no such prompting to go to you. I swear I can hear your
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58 voice sometimes, even though Diana says she doesn’t hear anything.
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59 Careful not to wake my guardian cat, I sneak outside to the balcony.
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60 Its cold out, but I don’t care. Not anymore. I remember when I used to
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61 find you out here late at night, staring at the stars. I’d ask you to
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62 come back inside but you’d always say you weren’t tired. I would go
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63 back in for a few seconds and come back with a blanket for the two of
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64 us to share. Sometimes I’d ask what it was and other times you’d look
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65 like you didn’t want to talk about it. But it didn’t matter because we
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66 were together. Is that what you were trying to teach me whenever I’d
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67 feel bad about not being able to fix things for you and you’d tell me
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68 that wasn’t what was important? I hug myself tighter as the cold starts
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69 to set in. I don’t want to go back inside now. Not yet.
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70
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71 ~A voice from the past, joining yours and mine
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72 Adding up the layers of harmony
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73 And so it goes, on and on
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74 Melodies of life,
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75 To the sky beyond the flying birds--forever and beyond~
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76
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77 When I look back on things, it seems like a blur sometimes. When
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78 we first met, when I saw you smile for the first time, when you
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79 returned to me, when we first kissed, when we would share our hopes and
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80 dreams in each other’s arms, when I saw you for the last time with that
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81 determined look on your face... I’m crying again, I realize. I should
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82 hide it before mother sees, but I can’t find the will. She wants me to
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83 be strong, to work my way through this, but I’m not as strong as you.
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84 You suffered through so much, Hotaru. You took it all and yet you
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85 continued on. You would never admit it. You never saw the strength in
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86 yourself that I always saw in you.
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87
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88 ~So far and away, see the bird as it flies by
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89 Gliding through the shadows of the clouds up in the sky
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90 I've laid my memories and dreams upon those wings
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91 Leave them now and see what tomorrow brings~
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92
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93 Sometime later, I find myself sitting barefoot on the hill where
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94 I spent so much time as a child, leaning against an old tree that has
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95 grown there. Here I can lose myself in my memories and forget all
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96 that’s happened. The birds are beautiful, Hotaru, but not as beautiful
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97 as the fireflies. Sometimes I’ll come out late at night and watch them.
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98 Sometimes I even think I see you amongst them, carefree and happy at
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99 last. It may last for just a split second out of the corner of my eye,
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100 but that sight alone gives me the strength I need to push forward. I
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101 know I can’t have you back, but sometimes its nice to pretend, ne? I
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102 smile a little as I watch the city in the distance. I don’t know what
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103 lies ahead of me, but I promise I’ll always remember you, that I’ll
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104 always love you.
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105
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106 ~In your dearest memories, do you remember loving me?
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107 Was it fate that brought us close and now leaves me behind?~
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108
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109 I’ve lost you so many times. I had thought that this time would
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110 be no different, that we’d find ourselves in the other’s arms before it
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111 was through. But it didn’t work out that way. It was such a cruel trick
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112 fate played, letting me fall in love with you before snatching you away
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113 from me. But I would do it all over again if I had the choice. It was
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114 so painful, but the joy you made me feel was worth so much more. I know
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115 we’ll be together again. Because... because I know that you love me,
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116 too.
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117
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118 ~A voice from the past, joining yours and mine
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119 Adding up the layers of harmony
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120 And so it goes, on and on
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121 Melodies of life,
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122 To the sky beyond the flying birds--forever and beyond~
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123
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124 “ChibiUsa-chan..?”
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125 I hear a soft voice whisper behind me, ripping me from my
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126 thoughts. That voice... My heart starts beating furiously as I sit up
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127 on my knees. It’s almost impossible to breath as I struggle to turn
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128 around quickly enough. It’s.. you... Standing up, I almost fall back
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129 down again. My vision blurs as tears start to form in my eyes. “Hotaru-
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130 chan?” I ask weakly as I stumble towards you. You merely smile, dark
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131 eyes shining with the inner beauty that made me fall in love with you
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132 in the first place. I throw myself into her arms, you stagger back
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133 under my assault. Sobs wrack my body as I hold onto you tightly. I’ve
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134 missed you so much. There’s been so much I wanted to tell you, but
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135 words escape me right now. I want to hold on to you for eternity, to
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136 never let go again. I can feel your fingers brushing through my hair
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137 and I feel myself sobbing more uncontrollably at the memories. Looking
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138 up, I see tears in your own dark eyes. Oh, Hotaru...
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139
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140 ~If I should leave this lonely world behind
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141 Your voice will still remember our melody
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142 Now I know we'll carry on
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143 Melodies of life
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144 Come circle round and grow deep in our hearts
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145 As long as we remember~
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146
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147 I want to hear you promise me that we’ll always be together, that you’ll never leave my side again,
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148 but its enough for me just to have you here with me now. I know that this time we don’t need promises like
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149 that. Because this time I know that we’ll always be together, even if one of us dies. Because you were with
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150 me through every step I took while you were gone. Just as I’d be there with you. But I’m so glad to have
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151 you here like this nonetheless. Clutching onto you tighter, I bury my face against your shoulder.
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152 Your answer to all of my unasked questions sends a warm spark through my body as your lips
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153 press against my own. I feel myself kissing back with all the strength I can muster as the tension from the
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154 past few years drains away from me in the space of seconds. I feel alive again in your arms. Truly alive.
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155 “How..?” I ask softly.
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156 You just smile again and kiss me softly. “I love you, ChibiUsa-chan.”
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157 I love you, too, Hotaru. And I always will.
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